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/-/ Created's Reviews /-/

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  • /-/ Created's Reviews /-/

    I figured I might as well! If you want you story to be reviewed, all you have to do is post in this thread with the usual description of your story so I know what I'm getting into. I'll try to be as honest as I can with my feedback, so keep that in mind. Please follow the template below when you submit your story for a review in the comments!

    I will at the very least read the first 3 episodes of your story, but if I am interested enough I will obviously keep reading. The amount of episodes read will be mentioned in the review. I'll try to get reviews done as fast as possible, but it might take a couple days at most. Good luck with your stories everyone!

    Title:
    Author:
    Genre:
    Episodes:
    Style:
    Description:
    Link:

    (And as for a shameless plug, I wouldn't mind for anyone to check out this thread in return! )

  • #2
    Title: Beauty And The Beast
    Author: Raeesa
    Genre: Thriller
    Episodes:5 (still more to come)
    Style:Ink
    Description:He is the leader of the Mafia
    She is a Nurse
    He takes lives
    She saves lives
    What happens when these 2 collide
    Link:http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6000369958256640
    Last edited by R.A; 11-07-2017, 02:55 PM.

    Comment


    • Created
      Created commented
      Editing a comment
      Thank you for submitting your story for a review! As a fair warning, the incoming review will be quite negative. I reviewed the first 3 episodes.

      Story: I wasn't a big fan of the story. I think it's something we've seen quite a lot before, so there wasn't enough originality added to it to make it stand out. It was fairly predictable as well, which didn't help either. The whole relationship between Stacy & Mason escalated a little bit too quickly for my tastes and ended up feeling very forced because of that. One positive point is that I did like Stacy & Mason both reacting to the spy's hospitalization in episode 2 in the same scene. I thought that was nicely done.

      Characters: The characters were felt very cookie cutter. They didn't have much of a personality too them outside of their role in the story. Tough mafia boss, scared victim... I think there can definitely be more flavor added both them and the supporting cast. The supporting doesn't feel very memorable either, except for the police agent as he had a big moment.

      Dialogue: I felt the dialogue was a little bit cringy at times. For example, you seem to have a tendency to make your characters swear a lot, even if it's not really necessary. Using words such as ''slay'' 3 times in one scene also makes dialogue feel a bit superficial. The spelling and grammar could on occasion also use some help. The two biggest points, however, were with the punctuation and speech bubbles. I haven't once seen a period, exclamation mark, question mark, comma etc. within this story. That can really make the text hard to read and comprehend at times. You should really improve on that. You also have a tendency to end your speech bubbles in the middle of a sentence to then continue the sentence in a new speech bubble. That can end up being quite annoying, and you should really use full sentences within your speech bubbles.

      Directing: There were quite a few points with the directing. Some of the backgrounds you've used were very pixelated and/or stretchy, which doesn't really give off a good aesthetic. There were occasional hiccups with overlays being in front of people when they shouldn't as well. You seem to have some trouble following the whole ''show, don't tell'' rule. Sometimes you don't really show enough, while other times you also add in things that aren't really necessary and just hold up the story. An example of the former would be the narrator saying what's happening at the start of I believe episode 2, when you should really just show it. An example of the latter would be the shower scenes or MC making a coffee. The punching and shooting could also use quite a bit of work. Your characters sometimes do not have a talk animation during speech bubbles (mostly when they speak multiple lines consecutively), which I think is a result of you not adding an animation to every line and instead just pressing enter for the next speech bubble. There were also some issues with the panning in the bar in episode 2 as well as a red transition on the highway in episode 3. One positive point is that you're already quite a way along with spot directing, so while it could use some refining you're already doing quite a good job!

      Choices: There were very few choices in the first 3 episodes, and none that made any real impact from what I could tell. I know you said at the end of episode 3 that there'd be more choices in later episodes, but the first 3 or so episodes should really be the ones to hook a reader. That's why they really have to be some of the most impressive chapters in a story. I felt like I was really reading a book instead of playing an interactive game, and since that's Episode's strong suit, you should really make use of it more!

      Overall: Overall I'm sorry to say I didn't enjoy your story very much. It could use a lot of polishing and refining, and I suggest you'd take a look at the characters and writing to see how you could make your story stand out more. I hope you see my review as constructive criticism that can help you moving on, as I'm not trying to trash your story or anyone's here! I hope this can help you improve it.

  • #3
    Title: The Darkness Within (Limelight)
    Author: Zayen
    Genre: Fantasy
    Episodes: 6 (ongoing)
    Style: Limelight
    Description: Tragedy descends the day your ability emerges. Will possessing such ability prove to be a blessing or a curse?
    Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5805209858867200

    Hope you'll enjoy it

    Comment


    • #4
      Here’s my story:

      Title: Projection!
      Author: Karlon Artis
      Genre: Comedy
      # Of Episodes: 5 (ongoing)
      Style: Limelight
      Description: Harry Stevens is looking for his big break in the world of musical theatre. But what will it take to get there?
      Link:http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6046875219918848

      Comment


      • #5
        Title: Cryptic Killer
        Author: Mia T.
        Style: Ink
        Chapters: 3 (ongoing)
        Genre: Mystery
        Description: Strange murders and a case bigger than you could imagine. As secrets spill will you want to discover the truth?
        Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5845486620770304

        Comment


        • #6
          Title: Falling for a Superstar
          Author: Ni
          Genre: Romance
          Episodes: 6(Ongoing)
          Style: Ink
          Description: Nicole unknowingly kisses a Superstar. Revelation, Differences, Acceptance! In the world of fame, can true love win?
          Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6115422028038144

          Thankyou so much for doing this.

          Comment


          • #7
            I've recent revamped my story with more advanced directing techniques and have published nine out of the eventual 18 chapters (+ an epilogue) –– so if betrayal, obsession and superhuman abilities are your thing, you will definitely enjoy the read!

            Title: Wings of Light
            Author: How_Novel
            Genre: Fantasy/Action
            Style: Ink
            Episodes: 9 (ongoing)
            Tagline: Power, fear, and fascination.

            Description: Discovering power comes at a cost, in the form of sharp lies and dangerous new characters. *character customizations*
            Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5462039907270656

            Comment


            • #8
              Hi, I really appreciate what you are doing.

              This is my story.

              Title: The Job Of Love
              Author: R.episodeofficialù
              Genre: Drama (Mix of Drama/Romance/Mystery)
              Style: INK
              Episodes: 23 (ongoing)
              Description: Will she open her broken heart to a cocky lawyer despite all the secrets he's keeping?Passion, lies and betrayal await.
              Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6340998113001472

              Instagram: r.episodeofficial

              Thank you

              Comment


              • #9
                Here's my story

                Title: Finding Ourselves Together
                Author: Kat Valentine
                Genre: Romance/Drama
                Episodes: 9 (ongoing)
                Style: Ink
                Description: See that girl, what's her name? Lia. She's changed a lot, not in a good way. What happened to her? Well...
                He happened.

                Link- http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6269696848166912
                Instagram: @kats_episode

                Comment


                • #10
                  Hey! Thank you so much for offering reviews!
                  I am new to Episode and I really need some advices:

                  Title: Involved
                  Bio: You discover that you are involved with the strongest mafia. But when you realize it, the war has already started.
                  Style:Ink
                  Genre: Mystery/Drama
                  Author: Lilia

                  Comment


                  • #11
                    Title: Speak
                    Author: J. Miley
                    Genre: Drama
                    Episodes: 38 (Ongoing)
                    Style: Ink
                    Description: With a dark past surrounding her parents' death and unable to speak, Liz tries to find a way to move on with her life.
                    Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6660427486068736


                    Thank you!!!

                    Comment


                    • #12
                      I would love a review

                      Title: Joanna
                      Author: HopelessRomantic
                      Genre: Romance
                      Episodes: 20
                      Style: Ink
                      Description: Follow Joanna through the trials and tribulations of first love. The awkwardness, the thrill and the passion
                      Link:http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5140942971600896

                      I will check out your link and your star power: overnight idol for you tonight and tomorrow

                      Checkout this story, on the Episode App! If you like it, support the story by passing it along!

                      Comment


                      • #13
                        Title: Love Quest

                        Author: Katie and Maddie

                        Genre: Romance

                        Style: Ink

                        Episodes: 5 ongoing

                        Description: After a tough breakup, you are on a quest to find love again. But, is being on a TV show a real way to find love?

                        Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5416940223594496

                        Instagram: @thetalk_maddie and @kt_episode

                        Comment


                        • #14
                          Hey, guys. I just published my very first story. Could you please review my story???

                          Title: Where do we go from here?
                          ​​​​​​​Author: Lawful Evil
                          Genre: Mystery
                          Episodes: 3 ongoing
                          Description: Have you ever heard about a miracle? No? Let the story show you the world of magic, spells and poisons.
                          Style: INK
                          Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6330841475842048

                          Comment


                          • #15
                            Hey guys! This is my first story
                            I'd love to do read for read!

                            Title: COMA
                            Author: anys
                            Genre: drama
                            Style: Ink
                            Episodes: 6 (NOT FINISHED!)
                            Description: You'd do anything to study at the college of your dreams. But what happens when 'anything' makes someone fall into coma?
                            Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6459320850055168
                            Instagram: @anys.episode

                            Why you should read this story: I really made an effort to create a story that is unique and challenges stereotypical views. I also included LGBT choices as I want to be as inclusive as possible!
                            I love writing stories and the more people read my story the more motivated I'll be

                            COMA.png

                            Comment

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