Amberose's Live Thoughts on Your Stories

Aw, no worries. You’re very sweet. Glad to hear you’ve got more episodes ready too :blush:

My story: Thriller: Tribe of Malapinchi
Author: Jannah Jackson
Genre: Thriller
Story style: All the 3 episode styles: LIMELIGHT, INK, Classic & Spotlight (for all 3 styles)
Description: Toss into a land of the sun, magic, lies and dark secrets. Can you make sense of the havoc you were tossed into and save everyone before it’s too late? CharacterCustomization
Episodes: 5
Instagram: @jannahjackson

1 Like

@Sunset_Shimmer - The Story of Avalon

  • So clever for you to add a disclaimer that the directing might not be compatible with tablets! I was only just told the other day that things were getting cut off in m own story when read on tablets lol

  • The fact that the prince is one of the MC’s is intriguing. I do like reading from male POV.

  • hahaha. nice horse.

  • There was a little moment whee the gates background popped up before the guards. Try spotting the guards with & instead of @ then have your transtion:
    &GUARD1 spot XYZ
    &GUARD2 spot XYZ

  • I’d recommend some close up zooms when MC and Cathleen see their parents, if only because Cathleen looks high as a kite being stuck in that one position. So some close ups of the characters talking will make that hidden.

  • The fairy flashback was cool. And I like that you’ve used the tattoos and new LL features. Towards the end, there was a small problem with Moonbeam and Hazel standing on top of each other, I think you meant to have Moonbeam walks to screen left? And then when Novus enters, he’s not visible on screen.

  • Episode 1 was a great length, and for the record I haven’t noticed any grammar mistakes of overuse of ‘Of course’, ‘But’, ‘And’, or ‘However’

  • Episode 2 starts and I’m actually surprised to see this is a short story… With your description, I was anticipating at least a 10 episodes story, so… I’m interested to see how you plan to pull this off as a short.

  • The subtle way you turned the shopping for one dress into choosing between three dresses felt very natural.

  • I’m guessing you have plans to put something behind the mirrors when doing Marabella’s hair and make up?

  • Just so you know, same thing with the guards at the beginning of the ball, they pop in after the transition when they should be placed before it.

  • I also like the chimes you play with the transitions.

  • Lol! She got changed in the bushes :joy:

  • Whoever the BG character is that’s talking to Cathleen needs to move back a few layers.

  • And Rowena’s little group look scaled a little too bog for where they are standing. Use the curtains for reference wen placing them and imagine what size they are in comparison to the curtains.

  • Good spot to end episode 2. Rowena makes me laugh.

  • So I read on to episode 3, but I think you’re still working on it since Rowena is finding the dress again which happened in episode 2

  • Randolph and Quentin :laughing::laughing::laughing:

  • Ooh that got violent very quickly! Poor Marabella

  • I liked the glimpse we got of the pirate (I’d been waiting for her since I read the description)

  • The barrel idea made me laugh

  • I enjoyed watching the prince basically interview everyone LOL

I wouldn’t be able to tell you which version to pick honestly… Both have pros and cons. LL had better costumes for the fairies (especially males), ink had better outfit for the king, ink has males who aren’t shorter than females by default, but LL has a lot more options within CC… so yeah… I really don’t know :confounded: I know I wasn’t helpful there, but I quite enjoyed reading it so keep me posted on when you publish whichever version you do because I’d like to read on.

1 Like

Thank you so much for the review! Even though I saw the notification, I was afraid to read the review. But, I’m glad you liked it.

When I was planning it out the story expands longer than I thought lol. So, it’ll be at least 8 episodes. I’ll have to take that note out of the story.

I think I’ll stick with the limelight version lol. I’ll go back and make all the corrections you suggested to.
Thanks again for taking the time to do this!

1 Like

AHAHAHAHA, I’m dying that you were scared to read it… Sometimes I am scared to read replies lol
Anywho, good luck with it when you publish! I really do think it’s great so far

@S_Unique - The Four Horsemen

  • It’s off to a great start with the prologue and I like that it sounds like it’s going to maybe explore angels? That’s a subject I’ve always loved reading about.

  • I love how you’ve described the town. It reminds me of this short-lived TV show I really liked: GCB.

  • So I chose to run after Delilah, and your readerMessage tells me I got 5 points, but like… why? I understand this is a choices matter story and you explained that points would be used with your author’s note at the beginning, but I am wondering what specifically did I get those points for?

  • Denise summoning Lucifer made me laugh - I think because of episode’s singing animations, they just look so funny.

  • Oh, she died… Now I feel bad for laughing… I do think the news of Denise was kind of skipped over a bit and would have liked to seen a bit more focus on that.

  • UGH! YES! When John makes that comment about people only caring/going to the funeral so that they’re “good” people. That is some straight up truth!

  • Be wary of info-dumps. There was a series of John’s thought bubbles with nothing actually happening on the screen. It might look better to have some kind of slow zoom/pan or to have John or Kit doing some animation while his thoughts were being read.

  • Something minor but after the… I’m going to call it a dream (?), your filter reverts back to colour before the transition. You might want to change it to @reset hsl in 0 with your next background to skip it fading back into colour at the wrong part.

  • Another five points! Do I get points for pursuing the “ghost”?

  • I like the wing overlays you’ve used. It’s nice improv considering it looks like it matches the female wings.

  • I’m kinda in love with your narration in episode 2 (you should be proud, because I’m often not a fan of this)… Just some of your lines are really powerful!

  • I would have liked if William had more of a story to why he lost it and caused wars - only because I guess I liked reading about the other two horsemen so much that I was looking forward to more.

  • I like the secretiveness of why Delilah is the fourth horsemen. It’s intriguing, you gave away just the right amount of info.

  • As everyone starts to leave the room, I notice it doesn’t look like William is standing on the ground, so be sure to spot him a bit lower.

  • I’m laughing at the insults about weight, considering the body types are the exact same hahahaha!

  • Idk if this would be something you’re up for, but going to suggest is anyway… You know that trick where people upload the backgrounds as overlays to make it look like they’re fading out? It would look cool if you did that for Hana and William so when John sees them, it actually looks like he’s seeing them while they’re invisible.

  • Wait, Delilah’s son? Oooohh!

  • The drive to Earl’s seemed really quick. Like blink and you might miss it kind of quick!

  • I’d be so annoyed if I were John with Earl’s response. Idc how quick the drive was, I’d want answers! Lol.

  • Small typo: “Either his dying” should be “Either he’s dying”.

  • Another small typo: Delilah in the library says “I though so” – thought - you’re just missing the ‘t’.

  • Delilah saying “God is back” reminds me of this TV show Preacher. If you don’t watch the show, this comment will make no sense hahaha.

  • There’s something I’m really loving but also hating but in a good kind of way about your story - I really can’t tell if the horsemen are the “goodies” or the “badies”.

  • I’m so sorry to keep doing this, but another typo. Beginning of episode 3: “Just because humans protray us has the four horsemen” - I believe you meant ''as" instead.

  • It’s nice to hear more about the curse now, you give away just the right amount of details to keep drawing me in.

  • “I thought no one new about that” - new should be ‘knew’.

  • OOOH YES! We get to find out why William fell! (Disregard earlier comment)

  • There’s so many layers to this story already. Like, I’m probably just reading into far more than I should but I think for the type of story you have, the mentions of faith and religion are done in such a way that even if people weren’t following Christianity, they’d still find this interesting and would probably even find some lines relatable.

  • Nadia is right… and I can’t believe you’d make Grace be a backstabber! (It’s more shocking since she’s real)

  • The comments about how Delilah smells creeps me out hahaha stalker vibes

  • His memories dreams are so interesting - they make me start speculating.

  • How did he wake up in his bed?

  • I stayed at home to read because I don’t like Kit - not sure what it is, but I don’t trust him. I think maybe he’s just a dope.

  • It looked so cool how she “took” her first soul. Nice overlay.

  • I feel like I must have imagined her referring to him as her son… Because now they seem like they might have had a relationship or something.

  • All I can think is how annoying it must be to code in those wing overlays all the time! Ha! I hate coding overlays

  • “You should never mess with something bigger then you” - “then” should be “than”.

  • Just curious, where did you get the idea for this?

  • Careful when you use a fade in transition, because unless you give a character command in the next scene, they’ll still be doing that same command (so John was kissing the air for a while haha)

  • Woah, 1000 years ago?!

  • “I won’t, I promise” … next minute “I lied” :joy::joy:

  • You know what? I actually find that kind of bratty that he’s asking her to take him into the sky… Entitled much?

  • OMG… Watching Lucas has my like :hushed: Now it’s all coming together.

  • I dare say you’ve probably had this question before, and you probably answer it in your story later on, but I still have to ask, why she wouldn’t let him die? They could still be together in heaven, no?

  • WTFFFFFFFFFFFF That curse is just… cruel! You’re evil!

  • It’s kind of weird to watch them kiss since he’s been reincarnated so he’s only 16/17, but she’s like 1000 years old (or more)… Where I’m from, we call women like her cradle snatchers :wink:

  • Hahaha at the car returned. I knew Kit was a dope, thinking it was sushi…

  • When John enters the forest, he cuts straight in front of a tree.

  • You’re such a genius and I;m such an idiot… I didn’t even realise this all linked back to Denise with her happy Episode singing animation that made me laugh way back when. You’ve really thought this plot through

  • Typo: Did you putt a protection spell on your nephew yet? Putt should be put.

  • I like Ivy hahaha! And I probably shouldn’t, she seems evil.

  • Aw William’s confession could have been so much more romantic… Typical guy, confesses right before there’s about to be a battle.

  • I feel like they’re scaled too big in the library, Kit, Hana and William that is. This is during the part where it’s now November. They looks taller than the bookshelf.

  • My only problem with the party scene is how small the tables look in the background. But your BG characters and spotting is great.

  • Omg, I just know John going to get the candles is a bad idea!

  • And I was right!

  • :hushed: It didn’t work?

  • Ok, I was about to say I would actually be ok if that was the ending. Like a sad ending… but then I see “Choose” and I’m like whatomgit’sgonnagetmoreintense!

  • Wait, no no nope. I don’t like this at all. I want to go back and have him die. Delilah is acting ridiculous in episode 10.

  • Um, I take back my last point, now that I see what you did there…

  • He’s John’s father? Wtf HOW?? Need answers omg.

  • The stabbing (?) of Hana wasn’t the smoothest of transitions. Maybe try adding times to your overlay shift commands (@overlay knife shifts to XYZ in 3) so that it looks like it’s actually falling?

  • Nice explanation about the Michael/John thing. I’m satisfied.

  • In the library, when Rebecca and Della are tinker_loop_rear I’m not sure what it’s supposed to look like they’re doing.

Wow, I’ve reached the end! Really interesting plot. I’m quite fascinated with this and tbh, I never would have guessed it would be something so intricate with the plot. Just be careful when proof-reading :wink: Maybe another set of eyes would be helpful to spot those typos before you publish.

Thank you so much for your review. Why do you get points for going after Delilah? You’ll understand in the end if you keep reading :blush:
I had never used filters so I’m definitely going to try the way you said it- thank you for letting me know. You definitly read wrong not her son xDD the background of the car ride going to Earls is really fast don’t know why :woman_shrugging:
I’ve never seen preacher :rofl::rofl:
The idea? I like fantasy story’s and story’s about angels and then I just thought what have I never read about before? And this is what I came up with. I just thought it would be different :wink:
Actually I don’t get that question a lot- if she had let him die I wouldn’t have much of a story to tell :joy::joy::joy:
Hana scene in episode 10 was very difficult for me it was a nightmare working with that overlay so I’ll definitely try your suggestion thank you again.
It was supposed to look like they were playing the cards.:rofl::joy::joy: i trued searching for overlays of cards and tables to really give the idea they were reading the cards but I didn’t find anything suitable :pensive:
Thank you for letting me know about the mistakes, I may ask you to be my proof reader in the future.:blush:
Going to fix the spot directing/size in the library scene, they really look to big :scream:
Thank you so much for your review and I’m glad you liked it and hope you’ll continue to read it.:blush:

1 Like

Oh gosh! I feel so terrible now thinking they were mother and son for like four chapters. I’ve been reading this story at night for three days so in my sleep deprived state I must have imagined that one lol

I’m amazed you totally thought this all up. It’s just so thought out and you really cover everything within it. I definitely will be continuing (in case you couldn’t tell how engrossed I was by this review) and absolutely, if you ever need a proof reader, hmu :laughing:

1 Like

Again thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my story :heart_eyes::kissing_heart:

1 Like

Hey @amberose
I would love if you could give my story a read + your opinion as well <3

My Story:
Author: May Laugh
Title: Trouble Twins
Instagram: maylaugh_episode
Genre: Romance (and a little comedy, too.)
Style: Ink
Danger. Passion. Love.
Always standing up for each other, going through thick and thin. That is what these twins are all about. But can they really master every chaos together?



1 Like

Hey, I was wondering… would you mind reading my story again? Your first review was really helpful and I think I’ve improved since.
I totally understand if you don’t want to read the same thing twice.

As a young writer, you find inspiration in an unexpected place. Is the hot firefighter you wrote about really just a figment of your imagination? When your book becomes a movie, you’ll have to choose: lie or risk losing everything! CC, INK.

:heart: Nelles

1 Like

Aww :sleepy: I love return customers. Of course I’ll read it again


@Kaskaydee - I reckon this is an ideal thread for you :heart:

Amber is so so helpful!!


Nawww :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

1 Like

Hey! Can you do a review of my new story?
Name: The fragments of the past

Author: Kate B

Instagram name: kateb_episode

Description: Gang life is dangerous and after a tragedy Lily is not the same, will she ever believe in love again?

Chapters: 3

Genre: Action/ romance

Style: Ink


1 Like

@fcukforcookies Jukebox Hero

Before I start, can I just say how much I love your cover? It just feels like there’s a whole theme to it. Really cool!
And also, can I just say I love your forum user name? LOL!

  • So for the first line of Chloe’s narration, consider rewording it to “I knew that I was going to be a star, since I was little”.

  • Ooh, nice idea to have it set up like a youtube video. And I’m impressed by the guitar. Here’s hoping they make it a real prop for LL though, I imagine it can’t be easy to direct that overlay.

  • Ahhhh your spot directing makes me want to cry. So beautiful! And all your BG characters look like you actually spent time designing them.

  • I’m half like why is she sitting down talking to us when she should be working? But then the customer speaks to her, so I do like that element of breaking the fourth wall - but only if this remains a constant throughout the rest of the story… And I feel like it will too, so this should be interesting.

  • Aha, your chef makes me laugh… And Boris isn’t a name I’ve heard in ages!

  • The backgrounds at the diner are super cute.

  • Holy shit, is this opening credits? Oh my, yes it is! I love it!

  • I wonder why one of your choices is in the premium box? Since choices matter, is this your not so subtle way of telling readers the best option?

  • Aw, your cheerleader uniforms are so cute. Loved the cheer routine! I would hate that coding, but you’ve pulled it off.

  • Hahahaha Cong is pretty funny too. Formalities, lawsuit, classic :laughing:

  • Ooooh I see where this is going what with the choir club and all… (I think…)

  • Oh strooth, I just realized what this whole diner thing reminded me of. Did you ever watch 2 Broke Girls?

  • First choice in episode 2 - change the spelling to “interrogate”

  • So… I’m actually pretty sure now that you’ve seen 2 Broke Girls, because a lot of this feels really similar… (like the pony comment, and the stranger in Chloe’s bed,)

  • And thinking about it now, Joy is kinda like Sue from Glee. It’s like a mash up of some of my favourite shows from a few years ago.

  • “I’m to exhausted to fight,” - you’ve used the wrong to/too, it should be too.

  • Chloe called Samantha Lucy… Was this on purpose?

  • I’m reading your disclaimer about the lyrics thing at the beginning, an I’m fairly sure you’re still not allowed to do more than 5 lines of a song just for giving credit to the composer, I think it still stays at the 5 line limit :confused: I could be wrong, I might have to check after writing this - EP 4 EDIT: Or is the disclaimer/you saying you have had permission from the composers that you can use more lines provided you credit them? It’s a bit confusing to understand, but if that is the case, how does that work in terms of songs that don’t give you permission. Like in the auditions episode, there were a few songs, but I believe it only allows up to 5 lines of any one song, which would mean you wouldn’t have been able to have Like a Virgin AND the song in the shower, in the same episode, since adding them together would have been more than 5 lines.

  • Oh gosh, you are a talented coder. I’m just in awe of Charlotte’s intro.

  • Charlotte and Liam = Rachel Berry and Finn… This is a mash up.

  • When Liam is backstage after singing, you will need to spot direct his speechbubble as its tail is pointing the wrong way.

  • Seriously. Where are your backgrounds from? They’re so adorable!

  • Uhh another similarity with 2 Broke Girls (Natalya). To be honest, I am concerned…

  • Er… The shower singing… Isn’t that also something from Glee? Granted, I don’t think Elijah is the equivalent to the one who was discovered singing in the shower either.

  • Lol, I chose not to go to the shower, because um… yeah she’s a teacher. That’s a bit weird if I tell her to go in to the mens shower :sweat_smile:

  • Episode 4 - Chloe at breakfast says “You make me sleep on the coach” I believe you mean to say “couch”.

  • Show tattoo, show cleavage or show both? HAHAHAHA

  • Oh… Nice to see my choice outcomes play out with the principle.

Righto, so I first want to say you are extremely talented at what you do. I really enjoyed this and you made all the character’s movements flawless as well as directing. I’m still worried about that song lyrics thing (perhaps you can clarify it for me if someone from Episode has said you’re allowed to use more lyrics if a composer allows you to?). My main concern I guess is just how many similarities I saw between 2 Broke Girls and then later on Glee. I honestly wouldn’t even know how to determine if this was too close to the originals… I don’t work for Episode, so it’s not my place to determine that, but personally I felt like some scenes/plot points were taken straight from the shows, and even some of the character’s personalities felt too similar too. I would really urge you to maybe contact support to double check that your story has varied enough from both shows. It might be a case of changing a few scenes around? I’d just really hate to see this get taken down because I did think there were some great original ideas within your story and you’re extremely talented.


First of all. Thanks a lot for your work :slight_smile:
To your comments.

All your mentioned grammar issues ar fixed now. Thanks a lot.

BG characters. When I read other stories, I hate when people don’t customize Episode characters and just put in sample ones. That’s why I’m doing it :smiley:

Boris the chief. My ex name is Boris, so yeah :smiley:

Premium boxes are kinda that kind of choice, that will do more to the story. When both are gold, it means both of the choices influence the story.

yeah. I am a huge fan of a lot of series, and I kinda wanted to make a story with all all this mash-up. Some characters are really inspired by tv personalities, but I tried to give them my own breath. Chloe and Sam tandem is based on Caroline and Max relationship, I wanted it to be dynamic, when one has a “bad girl with big mouth” vibe, and other is more shy. Charlotte is more of a classic Rachel, but I kinda want to add a darker vibe to her. About shower scene, I just needed Chloe to find Elijah, but didn’t know how to make him sing in school, so I remember about that Finn scene :smiley: Natalya was added actually because I am Russian, and I wanted to add something I am totally familiar with :smiley:
I kinda have to agree with you. Maybe they are too similar at some places. Maybe I really should rework this all a bit. As I’m working on the 5th episode, I feel like I’m going more and more from these similarities. But still… I didn’t want it to be like a copy mash-up of series, but maybe I failed here. I have to rethink everything now, I think, plus that thing with songs lyric. I can’t write songs like at all, but what I meant by “free to distribution”. I just found one author singer that have a post on his website that his songs are completely free for public distribution, if given credits. So I thought this could work. Maybe I should ask Episode.

Anyway thanks a lot. I have a lot to think about now :slight_smile:

1 Like

Couldn’t agree with you more about background characters.

Good luck with it all! I really think support will be able to assist you, and hopefully you won’t have to change too much because I’m sure you must have put so much time into this already xx (I think I just picked up on the similarities because I have seen every episode of both series)

1 Like

Hey! I’d like a review of my new story!

Title: TATYA: Professor Fever

Author: Giselle C.

Genre: Drama

Style: INK

Story Description: Tatyas life has been a series of unfortunate events. The only thing keeping her going is her love for law. Will the new hot prof keep her from achieving her goal?

Instagram: @gisellepisode

Small Cover:

Large Cover:



Anyone who wants to do R4R please PM me or DM me on IG. Send me an SS and I will guarantee you 3 chapter reads!

1 Like

Hey, thanks for coming back, but I’m sorry I can’t do a review for you… I’ve already done 2 for you, both of which you never replied to let me know if you found it helpful or if you even read it at all. The second of which you never even “liked” the post, so I’m not even sure if you’ve seen it still to this date.

Something I’ve added to my OP:

And since you’ve added this to your post:

I’m inclined to believe you don’t want my review. You may have just copied and pasted this from other posts that included this already, and that’s totally fine! But it does make it feel like you don’t care about a review from me. Sorry :pensive: