Amealia's Honest Reviews Re-Opened

READ THE ENTIRE PAGE BEFORE REQUESTING!!!

Hello to all of the aspiring authors who this may concern! My name is Amealia and I know that when writing you tend to go through your story many times and once you are one hundred percent sure it is great you want to publish it. You go to publish and its great until someone points out a mistake or a way it could be improved. Your confidence leaves in three seconds flat. I understand this!!! I deal with this same issue myself. That is why I created this thread, so none of us need to go through that.

Please Note: These are my opinions and may vary from other reviews you may get! I will be honest on this thread. This is a review thread not a debugging thread.

I tend to focus on the plot more than anything. I will talk about all of the other aspects of your story in my review as well but I feel like the plot is the most important part.

Make sure to tell me you have read my review as these do take time and I don’t want to do them for no apparent reason and post your story once. This is not a spam thread!

Fill out this form while asking for a review:
Title:
Author:
Genre:
Cover: (if you dont have one yet it is alright just say so)
Description: (as long or as short as need be)
What do you want me to pay attention to most?
How many episodes should I review? (I will only review the first three at maximum because this takes time and I am also setting time aside for my own story)
Any other things I should know: (Who made the art, English is not native language, etc)

In my review I will talk about the following things:
Title (does it relate to the story), Diversity (races, sexualities etc.) Relationships, Flow of the story, Realistic conversations, zooming, spot directing, animations, choices, plot (does it make sense and will it last), and originality

If you would like here is an example of a review I did for @Turtle_Cat on her story Save Me, Hero! .

Title: After only three episodes I am unaware of how the title relates to the story itself but as I have said I have only read three episodes and It may relate to something in the future if so it should not be a problem.

Diversity: Your story had people of mostly white decent while few people were not I would try to include more diverse characters but this does not change the meaning of the story so this is completely up to you I saw no relationships so I can m=not really say much about the character’s sexualities.

Flow: The story flowed relatively well but I feel like instead of timeskips throughout Hero’s day there should be something that leads her to what she may be doing next.

Realism: The conversations between characters were very realistic and were filled with emotion rather being very monotone. This was easily one of your best things.

Zooming: Your zooming was very well done but something that you should be aware of is the “No-Zone” you may or may not have ever heard of this. This zone is a small bit at the top and bottom of the screen that do not show up on devices like the i-Pad or any device with a different aspect ratio than an i-Phone 6. For more information on this “No-Zone” go to this link . . . https://www.episodeinteractive.com/write/guides?active_guide=commands

Spot directing: Your spot directing was great and I saw absolutely nothing wrong with it as it all made sense for this story and each scene within it

Animations: Your animations were put to use in a very good way. They were there when needed and cleared up any confusion concerning the character’s emotions

Choices: The choices were good but I would recommend that the outfit choices all have a name rather than “outfit 1” and “outfit 2”

Originality: This story is very original I have seen many stories about powers but I think this is a very good idea on how to make a story involving powers. I do not normally read stories about super powers but this one kept my attention throughout.

Plot: The plot is understandable and leaves no confusion to the reader but the holes within it leave for just the perfect amount of foreshadow and mystery to keep the reader interested in the story.

Other Notes: The story contained a few bugs here and there.

I would say your story is overall a very good one. I can proudly say I will be watching out for updates as I will definitely be reading!

Waiting list:
@Roy
@Writer_SA
@JannahJackson
@Zey
@episodeans
@piki.episode

2 Likes

Hi there, thank you for making this thread!
I’d love if you’d give my story a shot and send across a review. :blush: Here are the details:

Title: Sidereal
Author: aprilish
Genre: Fantasy/Romance
Style: Limelight
Blurb: An unlikely turn of events brings Dahlia from outer space to outside Felix’s window. Join them on their star-crossed journey as they cherish the wonders of being worlds apart.
What you should pay most attention to: Everything I guess? :rofl: The directing and plot mostly
How Many Episodes you should review: 3 preferably, but till wherever you feel like reading
Other things: -
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5063859204587520

The covers~

cover
coverrrrrr%20(1)

Thank you so much! :heartbeat:

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I added you to the waiting list :grin::blush:

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Thanks for the thread!

Here’s mine…

Title: Shado
Author: Roy
Description: After tragedy, Roy returns to civilization a changed women. She begins her crusade, determined to put things right, with the help of her trusted people,waging a one-woman on crime
Instagram : roy_episode
Style: Ink
Chapters: 7 and ongoing
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5108744574074880

Shado_S9_posterThumb_cEh8zzozgE

What you should pay most attention to: Everything
How Many Episodes you should review: After reading 3 if you feel like continuing you can

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I just added you to the waiting list :grin::blush:

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Thank you… I hope you like it…

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Thanks for the thread
Here is mine
Title: Target
Author: SRS
Genre: Mystery
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5961930186752000

Cover:
Target_Hs_posterThumb_9pldVMRdcq
Description:
When murder cases start to appear in your new city, you get a strange feeling they’re linked to your mom’s homicide and that you’re the next target. Will you, and with help, be able to find out who the killer is or fall victim? Family secrets, lies and betrayals await you.

How many episodes do I want you to review? 3 please

Any thing else: Nope

Thank you! :grin:

1 Like

Title: The title works. I can understand how it relates to the story by the end of the first episode.

Diversity: In the first episode their could have been more diversity but considering some characters aren’t from earth I wouldn’t worry to much about it. The second episode doesn’t have to many characters in it so I would say the same thing as the first episode. In the third episode there is a little more diversity so I just suggest to gradually add to that.

Flow: In the first episode I could tell you were trying to get all of the information in as fast as you could and because of it being part fantasy it can be hard to make sure the first episode flows well, I would try to add in some more and make it a bit longer and add some filler scenes in it that aren’t important to the plot just to give the reader some time to get used to the world. The second episode starts to slow down and gets a nice plot. Things start to smooth out and the speed calms down. It all flows together well. The third episode has a nice flow. Nothing feels choppy or forced it all flows together nicely.

Realism: The things the characters say in the first episode seem for this story genre as realistic as they can get. The second episode is far more realistic with what the characters say and I wouldn’t think of changing any part of that. The third episode is where some of the realism in what the characters are saying gets complicated. Felix gets angry fast and it may just be his personality but I don’t know that yet but from my perspective at the moment it just seems unrealistic that he would get so angry when Dahlia is dealing with negativity from others.

Zooming: The first episode zooming works to enhance the story and it doesn’t make anything odd either. The second episode zooming is the same as the first. The third episode zooming has no complaints from me.

Spot directing: The directing in the first episode although simple it works, it gets the point across and leaves no confusion of conversation. The second episode is the same as the first in this topic. The spot directing for the third episode is the same as the first and second.

Animations: The animations in the first episode are good. They work to make sure the reader knows what is going on. The second episode is the same as the first in this topic. The animations for the third episode become more dramatic which for an episode story is good so good job on that.

Choices: The first episode had choices that didn’t seem important to the story but it is good to have them there to give the reader a feel for your story and writing. The second episode had some choices that seemed relatively important of course I don’t know if they really are or not. The FAQ at the end of the third episode helped to clear up any idea of choices not mattering.

Originality: As of episode one your story is original. I haven’t seen one all to close to this. The second episode still hold the originality. The originality from episode three was not what I was expecting. I was expecting her to forget about her past a good chunk and just focus on Felix and it was refreshing to see a story that didn’t follow that typical plot.

Plot: The plot of the first episode is a little fast so I would add some filler scenes to give the reader a chance to think about the plot and information they are being given about the world. The plot of the second episode is much better than the first. It slows down more and gives the reader a much more comfortable speed while still giving them information about the plot. The plot for the third episode is nice. How Dahlia doesn’t forget about her home and her necklace and how she says how she is just pretending everything is alright to keep herself grounded really stood out to me and really seemed to play key points in the plot.

Other Notes: I just want to say congrats you got me hooked on your story. I added it to my favorites and that is most certainly where it is staying. It is a good story. If I were to have come across it any other occasion where I wasn’t requested to read three episodes I wouldn’t have continued to read after the first episode because the plot speed of the first episode confused me a lot more than I would have liked. I am glad I came across your story like this for that reason though.

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You have been added to the waiting list.

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Story Title: © Tribe of Malapinchi
Author name: Jannah Jackson
Genre: Realistic-Fantasy/Mystery/ Adventure/Thriller/Horror
Cover (With symbolic meanings of the cover inside the story)


Short Description:
New Description:
Tales of the Old Asians warned that WW2 scars still plagued the exotic-cursed tribe in the mythical land at East South East Asia. The land of Sun, light & black magic, lies and dark secrets. Can you survive, solve the havoc, cleanse and heal, save and free everyone? Or die in vain?

Old Description:
Toss into a land of the sun, magic, lies and dark secrets in Asia. Can you survive, solve the havoc and save everyone before it’s too late? FullCC/MiniGames/Tappables
What do you want me to pay attention to the most?: Plot, Flow of the story and realistic conversations
How many episodes to review: 3
Additional Info:

  1. Chapters are generally slightly longer than most episode stories…given because of the nature of the plot.
  2. CC: Yes
  3. MCs: 3 but you have to figure out who they are. Of course the first one would be the CC character.

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5909308359180288

1 Like

Oh my god. What a lovely review!! :scream::scream::scream: This was so constructive and helpful—I’m out of words! Thank you so much!!! :sob::heart: I’m so glad you enjoyed the story. I completely understand what you mean about adding in filler scenes; it’s now that I realize how rushed the plot might seem. Thank you for all the advice you’ve given, and for the motivation too! It really means so much. Thanks for the billionth time for taking the time out to do this, Amealia! :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts: Have a great day!

1 Like

It was definitely worth the read! You have a good day too!

1 Like

Title: Bio-Hysteria
Author: Zey
Genre: Action
Description: In a world where genome editing is available only only to the richest, a group of bio-terrorists tries to restore the natural equilibrium. Is violence the only option?
What do you want me to pay attention to most? Directing as I want to improve in that field, but if you spot any other big mistake, I would like to know!
How many episodes should I review? 3
Cover:

Summary

image

Title: Going Back Home
Author: Scarlet B
Genre: Adventure/Drama
Cover: Rosewood_8i_posterThumb_9JZfi6GhaU
Description: Anna decides to give Wintervale a shot. After all, this was the place where their parents met. But when her sister was framed for a crime she didn’t commit, what will she do?
What do you want me to pay attention to most? Grammar, plot, char development
How many episodes should I review? 3 please
Any other things I should know: the 3rd (and 4th) chapters are better than the first two
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6508859730558976

Hi Amealia! Thanks for creating this thread!! I look forward to the review and definitely be as honest as possible-- I will appreciate it. :’)


TITLE: HEARTSTRINGS ATTACHED
GENRE: FANTASY/ DRAMA/ ROMANCE
AUTHOR: PIKI
DESCRIPTION: Rewind, Relive, and Revive. A story about the encounters of love, friendship, betrayal, and… TIME MANIPULATION! Unravel the string of truths embedded in time w/ the top-dog team.

What do you want me to pay attention to most? I would love to hear what you think about the pacing and whether there are any confusions or questions about anything-- such as the plots or the backgrounds, etc. I would like to hear what you think about the characters so far as well if possible!

How many episodes should I review? I have 3 episodes so far and I would love if you could review all three. :smiley:

Any other things I should know: I made my cover, but I recognize that its a little pixelly and not the best quality :’) The first episode is a bit longer then the second and third chapters! :face_with_hand_over_mouth:

1 Like

Hello! I would like 3 episdoes.
I would like you to focus on my grammar, directing and characters/character development.
Name : Right Beside you
Plot : After a traumatizing event, Nadine’s health turned upside down. Can she recuperate after visiting an Eating Recovery Center? It’s up to you. [CC/LL/POINTSYSTEM/CHOICE MATTER]
Episodes : 3
Status : On going
Gerne : Drama & Romance
Style : Limelight
CC : Available
Link : http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5251847875788800
More about my story : My story contains advanced directing and a point system . There will be 3-4 artscenes as well. I’m also using new backgrounds , instead of the ones on episode’s Art Catalogue.
My IG : nellyy.epi

Story Cover [Made by me] :

1 Like

Hi Amealia! thank you for doing this, can you review my story?
Title: The Society (of Haverford)
Author: Scarlett:
Desc: Romeo of the House of Blue Eagle meets Juliette of the House Red Sparrow. One from fraternity, one from sorority & both despise one another.
CC ⁠— Choices Matter ⁠— LIMELIGHT
pay attention for: how the flow of the story goes, is it natural enough? Is the story interesting? Is the plot going to slow?

link:

The_Society_Vq_posterThumb_3hA7iMsZWV

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