Break Up [GAME]


#1

This game was one of my favorites and most memorable and hilarious game on the original forums.

Here is how it goes:

Player 1 will name a person (Whether a celebrity, a person here on episode, a character from a book/movie. Whoever. )

For example: Harry Potter

Then, Player 2 will need to post why they are breaking up with that person (Preferably in an extremely overdramatic way)

For example:
I’m sorry Harry, but this relationship isn’t working out! It’s not you, it’s me. I just feel like your feelings for Ginny/Hermione is just to great! I don’t think you love me anymore! Also, I just can’t be with a wizard, when I’m ajust a muggle! Imagine the teasing our (Imaginary) half-blood children would get from the nasty slytherins!

I’m sorry Harry, but we’re done!

You can either write in the point of view if yourself, or another character in the movie/book/Whatever etc It is up to you!

But please, be appropriate with your break ups and don’t be too mean. And always remember to leave the next person for someone to break up with so we can keep the game going

The first person needs to break up with: Wreck-It Ralph from Wreck-It Ralph

(A link to find previous Break Ups brought to you by the amazing Mehek: https://sta.sh/218jm9bf2gdw)


#2

Dear Ralph;
You may seem like a software at first, but you’ve became an authentic malware. You are written in Java, but I’m more like HTML. We are not similar, we are just too different.
I hope you find a new wife, someone you could make a strong connection with. There’s no wifi on me.
XOXO, LumTwo

Oh, I forgot!
Your next person is Kim Kardashian.


#3

Dear Kim,
I don’t even know why I started dating you. Whenever I’m around you, there is so much drama! I’m always being swamped for news about Kylie’s child, or being asked for more drama about your sisters, who by the way are kinda biatches. Also, your butt is totally fake. Sorry not sorry.

P.S. Also…I think you are married?

**sorry if I offended anyone who likes the Kardashians.

Your person is…Logan Paul


#4

Logan,

I’m sorry. I can’t date a meme. Enjoy life.

Your person is … Grumpy Cat


#5

Dear Grumpy cat ,

I’m sorry, but I’m not a furry … When I sarted dating you, I was high on questionabl drugs and it made me like a furry …

Your next person is Lizzie Bennet


#6

Look, Lizzie, Liz, Snuggle Boo. When we started dating I was totally down for like you know everything but you, uh changed. Change in ways as if I am pretty sure you and my BF changed places. Sorry, bye.

Your person is uh the couch


#8

Sorry bro

But I just can’t date furniture … I’m not fucking Belle .

Your next person is Raoul (from The phantom of the opera)


#9

Listen, I know you love me and all, but you’re like, wayyyy to clingy. I prefer the Phantom anyway. Why? Because he’s, like, willing to kill for me and everything, so… yeah. Hope you have a good life?

Next person: I don’t know, a ninja turtle?

R.


#10

Ninja turtle, I’m sorry I can’t date you anymore. I mean you’re a turtle. Why would I even date a turtle? And I really don’t like ninjas soo… Bye forever, buddy.

Your person is Tom from Tom and Jerry. (so random)


#11

Dear Tom ,

You spend more time with that mouse Jerry than with me … I think there’s something about yourself you still didn’t figure out … Also it’s kinda weird dating a cat

Your next person is : Pickle Rick lol


#12

Dear Pickle Rick,

This isn’t going to work. AT ALL NO I DO NOT CARE WHAT YOU SAY

Your Tinder profile showed a picture of Thomas Brodie-Sangster so I clicked and you came to our date… and I noticed you were a, um, pickle and a pickle with CLOTHES MADE FROM RAT GUTS

You did get my gifts but they were all… horrific. I do not enjoy the heads of your enemies or the weird weapons you make.

So go crawl back to the sewer and rot there because you were a horrible boyfriend!

xoxo,
Blu

Next Person: Pepe


#13

Pepe, I don’t even know why I started dating you. I mean… Was I drunk? Why would I ever want to date a frog? And a frog like you? People may like you, pepe, but I DO NOT. You’re the most annoying creature in the world. I’m sorry but I have to break up with you.

Next: Winnie the Pooh.


#14

I’m sorry Winnie, but we have to break up. I feel like this addiction of yours is tearing us apart. You never spend time with me anymore. its always honey this, and honey that. I just can’t take it anymore.

Next: Spongebob


#15

Spongebob … gasps

LOOK I’M DONE WITH EATING WET MEAT AND ALMOST DYING WHENER I SEE YOU … I can’t breathe underwater … So I’m breaking up with you … If this breaks your heart … GO HANG OUT WITH THAT SQUIRREL YOU’RE ALWAYS WITH!!

Next : Lily Allen


#16

Lily Allen…you sound vaguely familiar, but I have no idea what you’re known for. In fact, my first thought when I see the name ‘Lily’ is ‘Harry Potter’s mom’ and that’s why we need to break up. Because first of all, if you are Harry Potter’s mom somehow, she’s dead and I need to move forward with my life and get over you because I know you’d want me to be happy. Also dating someone else’s mom is weird. And if you’re NOT Harry Potter’s mom, we still need to break up because it’s clear that you just can’t be a priority to me. It’s not me, it’s you. Become somebody I recognize and then maybe we’ll talk.

Next: JK Rowling


#17

Joanne, I am sad to say this, but I am breaking up with you.

I won’t lie, the beginning of our relationship was beautiful, I was mesmerised by the world in your head and your words enchanted me like a spell, I thought you were the one that would make my life a love story and that being your partner would be the best thing in the world. But I was wrong, I was so wrong and so blinded by my admiration that I couldn’t see it.

I couldn’t see how your words were cheating me, how you lied to me all of this time, how you ignored my ideas and feedback and turned a blind eye whenever I proposed something that was different to what you had in mind. And the worst of all, I couldn’t see how you never cared about me, and yet pretended to do so. At first it was only with your stories, but with time it turned into something else, something worse. And it was like being dragged around in life by someone who couldn’t even notice I was there. And then you chose him for your movie.

It took me a lot of time and countless of your fans claims to notice what you were doing to me, how I was withering away to become your lap dog, and i can’t do that anymore. I’m putting myself first.

I hope you realise your mistakes one day, until then, this will be the last time I’m communicating with you.

Next: John Watson


#18

I’m writing about the Arthur Conan Doyle version of him. I haven’t watched the TV show.

Dear John Watson.
Your admiration for Sherlock has gone too far, dear. I asked you what you wanted to eat for dinner last night, and what was your answer?: "Chicken because it is Sherlock’s favorite food. He is brilliant, he even knows objectively what’s the best food created by humanity. I ALWAYS eat chicken."
I…I am speechless. When we went to the park a week ago, I asked you what was your favourite British historical figure. And you answered: “Oh, of course it is Sherlock. He is the reincarnation of intellect and intelligence. He is the cleverest man I’ve ever met.” R-Really?
You keep talking about his brain. Is that a more attractive thing than, ahem, me?
The next day, we arranged to meet at the cinema. We were going to watch It. Every time a character was in danger you said: “If Sherlock was here he would…” The whole film was about some children who were chased by a homicidal clown, so your comments were quite numerous.
Seriously, you need…uh, to be less obssesive about his intelligence.
I break up with you, unless you stop talking about his brilliance.
XOXO, LumTwo.

Your person is… Mickey Mouse.


#19

Dear Mickey Mouse,

I’m sorry but I can’t be with you for multiple reasons. 1) You seem to pay attention more to Minnie than me. 2) You’re a mouse. 3) Aren’t you like 90 years old? (saw that from a meme lol) No offense…

I’m sorry, but this is the end.

Your person is…

Mr. Bean.


#20

Mr Bean? We’re breaking up because Bean is the worst last name I have ever heard. Ever. That’s all I have to say to you.

Your person is…Jennifer Lawrence!


#21

Hey, J-Law!
It was okay for a while, I loved how quirky and relateable you were, but you’re now just too relateable to be related to.

Sorry.

Your person is Selena Gomez