@Marshmallow_O - Mystery on Hanging Hill Lane
1st Episode
- The one major thing I noticed is how u spot-place characters. To make them look further you place them above the ones who are closer. I advise to put them on the more or less the same eye-level, but play with scaling, like in the guide below. I see it everywhere tbh, in school scene too.
Guide
- “Guess what” speechbubble could be placed higher.
- Chicken but xD
- Liked how you make that overlay-background overlay thing before customization.
- “You are right…” in convo with Leilani. When MC says this line, the zoom is still on Leilani.
- When MC and her friend are talking bout evening plans, u used for both of them for at least two times in the row similar animation (I think talk_neutral). maybe put the other, cause tbh when you put similar animation for even 1 character, for more than 1 line in a row, they start to look like robots.
- You work really well with overlays, but spot commands really bug me. Guys in the hallway (with MC crush) are higher than lockers.
- “Birth giver, sperm provider” xDDDD what
- When MC walks to her brother room, you show like all her path. I get it, you are very good with overlays and stuff, but maybe try to cut off unnecessary parts, that are just for directing, rather than for the plot and character development, cause they might seem like fillers.
- When MC walks to the door (after the ring) I see Bea’s hand on the edge of the screen. Place her a bit further.
- Sure. Go to a sketchy place. that is to die for
- The first scene at Hanging Hill Lane. Same old, spot commands for all the characters.
- Sometimes you zoom on characters, that kinda cuts them a bit. Dunno if it is intentional. It bugs me a bit, so I mention this. (when Kai says "All I want to do is to find my sister) - this is the first time I noticed.
- I got until the end of chapter one without any comments. I honestly loved it. Kinda reminds me of The Saw xD Just less bloody xD Your chapters are quite long. I’d say you could even split them in half, and the length would still be decent.
2nd Chapter
- Ok. So I finished 2nd, and I don’t actually have anything to say about directing, 'cause everything is great.
Overall.
So I finished 3 chapters.
I mentioned things I think you could fix in regards to directing in 1st episode part, and most of them are reoccurring. These are spot placements, and the way you zoom, that kinda cuts characters a bit.
Now to the plot. I liked the plot, it hooks you kinda fast. Very engaging. I wish we would learn more about other characters tho, not just MC, Ash and Storm, but maybe we will in next chapters.
I loved the story, and will continue to read it 