Granted, but you would be lazy to do other things.
I wish unicorns were real.
(same, and I have no heart to actually corrupt this because my emo heart can’t take it)
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Granted, but it’ll only last for a day
I wish that we didn’t have to talk about … feelings
Granted, but only for an hour. After that, you will have to talk about feelings all. The. Time.
I wish to be a decent editor.
Granted, but you’ll lose all of your work, digital or not.
I wish I didn’t snack so much.
Granted, but you won’t be able to eat any of your favorite snacks
I wish I could run a mile in under 5 minutes
Granted, but every mile after the first would take over 5 hours to run.
I wish I would stop biting my fingernails.
Granted but u will bite your fingers 
I wish to finish 3 chapters before fantastical contest’s deadline.
Granted, but they’ll all be rushed, weighing in at about 150 lines per episode.
I wish my stomach would stop hurting.
Granted, but after that your feet will start hurting.
I wish I could move somewhere better.
Granted, but your current place would get demolished.
I wish I could be like Doctor Strange.
Granted but u will be too strange
I wish to ace all my exams.
Granted, but then you will get a F- on every other test
I wish I had— Friends…
Granted but they will all be fake.
I wish for unlimited data to use everyday
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Granted, but your phone would always be stuck at 1% of its battery charge.
I wish I could see my friends right now.
Granted, but they would be able to see you too.
I wish there was a system of ‘children can divorce their parents’ 
Granted, but you’d have to pay $10,000 to use it.
I wish I remembered to charge my tablet more often.
Granted! But you will never remember to charge your phone.
I wish I knew where I left my earbuds.
Granted, but you’d forget where your house keys are.
I wish I could get places faster.
Granted, but time will stop.
I wish there was no more suffering in this world.