DISCUSSION: Being Rude VS Constructive Criticism

Constructive criticism:
Giving advice while also respecting their work as they put a lot of hours into it.
Example: I like this but if you don’t mind, maybe this this and that could this this and that. This is because this this this might that that that. But it’s up to you, it’s your story. Was just giving some advice.

Being rude:
This is and this is so out of place, why is this this and that blah blah blah.
Also this this and this is blah blah blah!
It needs to be this this and that.
This story is stupid!

Can you spot the difference?


Where do you draw the line between rude and constructive? I draw the line with when they only have complains there sound a bit like insults and dont say anything helpfull

example a review I got for my story which I would say is pretty good (and so do a lot of others), she said it had to many mistakes to continue, but she didn’t mention any of the mistakes she thought it had, only that she didn’t like the way i made the CC, she said her self the story was good but she felt like saying it wasn’t good enough to continue reading

what she said felit like asking if this dress was pretty and they said yes and gave it to them and they said no way I am waering that

giving a review can be rude, because sometimes peoples stories are just bad, but if you just tell people you think it’s bad without giving them advice on how to improve you shouldn’t be doing review

again example I just myself gave a review on a story where it was jumping from scene to scene barely spending two lines in each, I asked a lot of questions if some of those scenes where important, gave advice on adding more dialogue to the scenes, and even send her a few videos to help her writhing.

Should someone asking for constructive criticism be prepared to deal with rude comments?
Yeah they should, you want honesty in a review, but mostly you want help, if nothing in the review helps it was a waste to get it

Should people be held accountable for being plain rude if someone asks for constructive criticism?
yes, I think so, when you give a rewiew you are there help the person improve the story not ruin it for them

How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the constructive criticism they receive? usually friendly, I had a few who asked and got angry because I wasn’t there really bad story was amazing and I loved it, if you can’t take criticism you shouldn’t get a review, now I can understand disagree, but if your response to been told your story arent good is to insult the person who said that you aren’t ready to put your story out in the world,

How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the plain rude criticism they receive? depends, if the person are just rude and don’t help or give advice, I think the best would just be to write, thanks for the review it was very unhelpful I had hoped for some advice which you didn’t give any of, actually what you said was kinda rude,

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Constructive criticism is when you say what you think straight out without any avoidance, but in a way that can benefit you, the reviewer, and the receiver. Meanwhile, being stuck up rude is when you say it so bluntly and offensively, does not help receiver at all but instead makes them mad. Here are examples of how they’re different:
CC: “I really enjoyed this story, but I think it would be better if you fix this, or change this.”
R: “No offense or anything, [if someone says no offense, it always comes out offensive or at least, 50/50 of the time] but your story really sucked, and you might wanna do it all over again.”

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thing is, people will always provide comments, either in the form of polite constructive criticism or “hate” whether you ask for it or not. once you put your work out on the internet, you must be prepared at all times to receive all types of feedback. it’s up to you how you handle this, but remember that two wrongs never make a right, so if someone is being rude to you, you shouldn’t be rude back.


Here’s the deal:
There is a line between rude and constructive criticism. But there are always two sides to the story.

People work hard on their stories and they want to be recognized, but they also want feedback. But they’re hurt because the feedback isn’t what they wanted.


Maybe their story just isn’t good, and you have to give a lot of pointers. Why lie to them? It’ll only hurt them further. And I think that sometimes, it’s better not to sugar coat things.

In my opinion, give good criticism, but be aware that the other person has feelings too. And that it’s really important not to destroy their confidence. If they’re making a lot of mistakes, maybe offer to help them fix a couple?

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When I’m reviewing a story (I’ve done it a couple of times) I start off with listing the things I liked about the story. If I find something I don’t like about the story, I tell them point blank “I don’t think this fits with XYZ,” “I think this might be problematic,” etc. and say it in a very specific way so they know exactly what to fix. I would also provide potential ways it could be fixed.

I once read a story (on a different account) and the second episode included sexual assault so the LI could save the MC as their way of meeting, but the directing was well-done. I read that part and told them that the directing was well-done, however it confused me as to why they included SA, and they said that they wanted the LI to be the MC’s hero. I said “Okay, but there are better ways of portraying that without using such a triggering topic. Here are some examples:”
Point of this was that I gave them a positive, then I fed them the negative with ways to fix it.

Constructive criticism is something you think that the writer could benefit from hearing (This scene is kinda pointless, this zoom in scene x was messed up, there was a grammar issue/misspelling when MC was talking to BFF, ect).
Being rude is giving them negative feedback they can’t work with (the story sucks, this scene sucks, this directing is bad).

(sorry if none of this made any sense, I hope I got my point across tho)


I can totally do that for you. I love reviewing stories and giving the author ways to improve :blush:


it’s a tough question because everyone’s different. Something that doesn’t seem rude to me might be perceived as rude by someone else.

I mean, there are obvious rude comments, like “this story is boring / bad / I hate this / etc”. There’s nothing constructive here, it’s just their opinion. And while they’re entitled to that opinion, there are nice and not so nice ways to express it.

don’t say “I hate this story, it’s so cliché”, say “I think this story uses themes that are too recurrent in stories and I didn’t like it for that reason”. There’s not much constructive criticism in the second option either, but at least it’s said in a more respectful way. On time I got a DM that said like “not to be rude but I hated the ending.” like, 1) it’s rude 2) at least tell me why so I can try to fix it

constructive criticism is fine and even welcome, I personally get some from good friends and it has helped me a lot.


When you are putting down the content or insulting it instead of offering advice for improvement.

Yes. No matter how good you think you are. You CAN’T please everyone.

Of course. Regardless of what they’re doing, people should always be held accountable for their accounts.

Thankful for the time and effort put into the criticism, and take it on board without taking it to heart.

Explain that they think what they’ve said was rude and unhelpful.

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The main difference to me is having a reason to back up your opinion of something as well as ideas on how to improve. Being rude is “this sucks” or other awful comments without an explanation or helpful ideas.

I draw the line at obvious obnoxiousness and the sense that the person is simply being mean and trying to diminish something or someone.

I think that someone who asks for ‘constructive criticism’ should think objectively. Some people are helpful and won’t sugar coat what they think; while others are simply trying to tear someone’s dreams down. There is a difference between blatant honesty and giving someone a different viewpoint or tips to improve/explanations for why you think something and being just mean to someone with nothing helpful.

If you ask for something, be prepared to hear things that you may not like. But the bottom line is that it’s your art/story/song/life… .if you don’t want to hear negative/constructive viewpoints, don’t ask strangers to read/view/comment on your things. That said: the people asking for the constructive criticism should be prepared to take things into consideration.
It’s not mean to say: " I think the nose looks a little off/weird- but here are some tutorials that may help/I’ve used to get better at noses." Whereas, it is mean to say " Your drawing is hideous, you should just give up on art period. You suck at it!". See the difference- both say something negative about the subject- one is respectful and helpful while the other is just rude.

Learn to recognize the difference- respond to the respectful helpful people and don’t give the time of day to the people trying to tear you down or make you feel like you can’t do something or at the very least- that you can’t improve.


It’s not a clear-cut line. I’m not one of them, but there are blunt and ‘brutally’ honest people out there which some people will indeed acknowledge as blunt, whereas some will find it rude. So it’s more of a case-by-case basis. Could be unhelpfully kind, constructive, blunt, or just plain rude. Also, saying you’re just being brutally honest is NOT an excuse to be outright rude.

Yeah. There are rude people in the world and just because you asked for constructive criticism, it doesn’t mean rude people won’t come along and be rude. I’m not at all saying it’s okay to be rude (it’s def not)- I’m just saying, the world isn’t a perfect place, and there will be unkind people. However there are also a lot of kind people in this world who can help you really improve and be a valuable part of your learning journey!

If they are rude, yes. I also maybe feel like you don’t get to decide how people feel about what you say. Yeah, some people are overly sensitive and do need to learn how to take constructive criticism, but sometimes there’ll be disagreements and feelings will get hurt. You don’t get to decide if the other person is hurt- that’s something only they can decide. Maybe in some occasions, if they are being too sensitive in your opinion, you could apologise that they feel hurt, rather than for what you said. Like, “I’m sorry you feel hurt.”

Constructive criticism aren’t commands. If you really don’t like it, then you don’t have to take it on board. But if you’re asking for it, you should really be okay with receiving it and hearing if there are any things that could be improved on. There’s a difference between constructive criticism and praise. Constructive criticism will 90% of the time, not be 100% praise, and if you get angry at the person for pointing out mistakes in whatever you’ve made, then you should have asked for praise instead. Anyway, generally it’s nice to be mature and respectful about it and thank the ‘reviewer’ for their comments and time, and think about it and how you can use their advice to improve.

It will be hard, depending on who you are, you may be quaking with rage or sobbing, but try to handle things maturely. I don’t feel like shouting at them and starting drama or revenge wars etc. is the right way to go, because it’s just going to get bigger and hurt you more and maybe even them. End the war before it’s started- ignore them, say ‘alright’, whatever you want to do. Personally I feel like starting drama isn’t in your best interest.

Also sorry, this is a hot mess of a reply (just like I’m a hot mess of a human LOL) as this was written post-mental-breakdown so pls forgive me :joy:

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I do reviews, so I do try to make the line between being rude and giving constructive criticism as clear as possible. Even if it’s not their intention, constructive criticism can come off as rude. It doesn’t always help, but i always try to include a disclaimer that I’m not trying to be rude.
If you point somethign out that you think was poorly done and just say it’s bad, that’s rude in my opinion. But if you say it’s bad but tell them how to improve it, then that is constructive criticism.
I think the person asking for feedback should be prepared to have the person not like their stuff, or point things out, but they shouldn’t have to expect the person to be rude about it.


Example. I ask someone if they can read my story and provide me feedback/thoughts. They come back and say I read your story and it’s trash. That would be considered rude. However, if the person said your story is not for me, but here are some tips to make it better. That is constructive criticism.

Should people be held accountable for being plain rude if someone asks for constructive criticism?


How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the constructive criticism they receive?

“Thank you for your advice/thoughts/opinion, I will take all of this into consideration.”

How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the plain rude criticism they receive?

See, I’m the wrong person to answer this because if you decide to be rude with me, I’m coming back harder. So, I guess someone can say “Thanks for your opinion.”

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Where do you draw the line between rude and constructive?
Well, I can pretty much tell when a person is rude based on their words. For example, “Your story is crappy and poorly written.” Obviously, that’s not constructive criticism, that’s someone who is being rude and discouraging. Name calling and saying rude things about an author’s story, is when I draw the line. They’ don’t give any type of advice or encouraging words on how an author can improve, instead they make disrespectful comments and statements.
Should someone asking for constructive criticism be prepared to deal with rude comments?
Yes and no. Everybody has different opinions and different ways of saying what they mean. Some people are brutally honest while others are nice and humble. You just have to be ready to accept both point of views.
Should people be held accountable for being plain rude if someone asks for constructive criticism?
I do think so because at that point, a person is just being discouraging and mean toward that author who is asking for constructive criticism.
How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the constructive criticism they receive?
They should be willing to hear people out and except their advice or help. If a person asks for it, they have to be willing to hear what people have to say about their story. Otherwise, there would be no need for constructive criticism.
How should someone asking for constructive criticism respond to the plain rude criticism they receive?
This is sort of a tough question to answer, but I think a person should just say okay and thank you in response to rude criticism they receive. There’s no use of going back and forth with someone or starting an argument.


I’m currently doing reviews and I try to be as cautious as possible to make sure my wording is positive and constructive.
I do this by choosing my words carefully (not using derogatory words like “this isn’t good”, “I don’t like this”) and offering advice on things they can improve on. I make sure to tell them the things I did enjoy about their story and encourage them to keep going.
I also Let them know that they are under no obligation to take my advice as they’re solely my opinions.

I had someone review my story before then publicly post their “grade” out of 10 and the “review” which was extremely harsh, rude, and had a lot of “I don’t like this” and “you should do this” tones instead. I mustered up the courage to like their post to show that I did read it, but I didn’t comment further nor will I contact that person again. I was so embarrassed that it was public for everyone else to see. It kind of scarred me so I’m very cautious when asking others to review my stories :confused:


Oh no! I’m sorry that happened to you. I hate when people put your story on blast like that and talk about it. That’s being mean instead of encouraging you to maybe make a few changes or telling you that your story has potential.


I see you girl I see you :face_with_hand_over_mouth:




I appreciate that, and you are very right.
They hadn’t done any reviews by the time I requested so I didn’t know what they would do, but I felt so bad for some of the people before me when I saw what was said about their stories. Just very harsh and unnecessary.
So as a reviewer, it’s very important to me to help in the most positive and constructive way possible :slightly_smiling_face:


This might be just rephrasing of what I said earlier, but if you’re writing reviews with the intent of helping authors with their stories, part of that is making it a goal to give reviews that won’t kill said writer’s passion. A lot of greats probably wouldn’t have made the art they did later on if somebody had smothered their passion for it early.

Not saying at any time that it’s your responsibility to be any writer’s personal cheerleader or give a review to anyone and everyone who asks. Don’t neglect your mental health or overextend yourself. I’m just saying everyone starts somewhere.