Everyone seems so different in this world and somedays when people comment on different things like “you work too slow” or “why are you so jumpy/on edge” “why can’t you just…” “you don’t look depressed/anxious.” “It couldn’t be that bad” I could go on I wish I could lend them my body for a day so that they see and interact with the world the same way I do they would realise:
I do things as fast as I can, when I speed up my mind can’t process it the same then I make mistakes. It’s not proven but it’s expected to be part of the way my epilepsy effected my development in my early years.
You wanna know why I’m on edge/jumpy? If you had walked in my shoes you’d know, you’d also know I can’t help it.
I may not look depressed or anxious but on the inside I am constantly questioning my every move and word, assume the worst of a situation, worry about a lot of different things, putting myself down, feeling like I’m worthless and feel like I’m in a pit forever falling deeper
I just wish people would be a bit more understanding because if you could really be me for the day you’d see why I am the way I am
Yeah, everything would be so different if criticizers and others could see through the eyes of the person they’re against. Everyone has their own perspective and problems, so…
I can totally relate. I’m currently on a hiatus from teaching because I was becoming so jumpy I’d scream if someone disrupted me while I was working. I couldn’t seem to keep up with things. My mind would be working on overdrive trying to solve multiple issues at the same time and in the end I’d just freeze with my mind going 100 miles an hour.
I bet there’s a way you could code this into your story. I would love to read it. One of the best things we can do as writers is invite people into our world. You’ve inspired me.
