i dont know. its how you write it. sometimes something there works great in one story suck in another. or if you say something in the wrong way. and how you show it.
Moved to Episode Fan Community since this is related to Episode stories. Make sure to check out our Forum Tutorial for more info about where to correctly create topics, and feel to PM me if there are any questions.
For example, if you keep telling about the problem, the reader is gonna get bored because he/she is here to read a story to keep him entertained. The information you dump on him will not be received well.
An interesting way to do it would be show, instead of tell. Don’t tell about it. Don’t make them talk about it. Show the deceased person facing that problem or something!