Hello Darkness, My Old Friend . . . (Things We Will Probably Never Get As Authors or Readers)

So, I’m really bored and it’s late where I live. When I’m bored and it’s late, I get to thinking and you know what I just realized? We will probably never EVER get these things that I’m about to list. We’ve asked for it for 5 years. Some of them we’ve even seen done. And yet, there are no updates or progress on them. So, let’s get into this depressing list.

1.) Different body types.
Sorry, people. In Demi Lovato and Pitch Perfect, both Demi and Fat Amy had different body types than we’re used to seeing in Episode and yet we have not had even ONE change in the body types (maybe other than tattoos and scars which seemed despicably easy to add, but I digress).

2.) Children and non-creepy looking old people.
Sorry again, but there are NO stories that I’m aware of with this and no one has EVER said this was in the works.

3.) Stories that belong to be in the featured section.
I don’t know the qualifications it takes to be a paid author, but it’s clearly an Illuminati conspiracy because I can’t recall ONE author that didn’t rely on overdone cliche’s to drive their stories since the paid author and Episode team-written stories program. (Not to say none of them weren’t decent or even better than that.) And on top of that, it’s gotten WORST over the years. I seriously doubt any thing of substance will ever be promoted on the Featured shelf and that’s just how I feel.

Feel free to add to the list below.

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  • The hairstyles in featured stories. I mean, this isn’t impossible, but it’s unlikely? They’re beautiful and I want them :sob: the ones in College-ish are amazing! I look somewhat like ME!

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YES, thank you! And have you noticed that every time a featured story has an original plot it gets taken down after like 5 episodes? cough Instant Princess cough cough Envy cough.

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That’s what I said! The College-ish hairstyles are so gorgeous, like ugh!

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Again, it’s an Illuminati conspiracy, lol.

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