Hey could you check out my story and give me some honest feedback

More feedbacks are appreciated :blush: :pray:

How do I choose what I read? What device are you using? My iPhone won’t let me chose.

So I’m editing my first episode right now, is there a way to share the edited version without publishing it so people can compare it with my published first episode?

Not unless you make it as a new story in your portal and share the link to that one :grimacing:

Ok so I’m listening to your advise and trying to rearrange the scenes a bit, I’m going to update the whole first episode then, would you be inetersted in reading it again when I did and share your feedback once more and tell me which one is better? I’m going to save the other ep just in case.

1 Like

Absolutely :slight_smile:

1 Like

Thank you!
I’ve updated it now, I rearranged scenes, cut some stuff out and changed some dialogues a little. Like you suggested I tried doing the flashback scenes where I thought it kinda fit, not sure if it throws the reader out of the current scene though.

1 Like

I like how you’ve done it a lot :grinning:
A couple of things I would recommend now with these changes is:

  • Maybe play around with filters. For all the flashbacks, it could work if you change the hsl (if you want to do this but don’t know how I can link you a guide)
  • Since you still show most of the characters asleep/waking up after Beverly’s scene but before the auditorium one, I’d still state their name. Either in the narration box like you already have, or you could get fancy and make name overlays? The only thing is that you’d need to wait for approvals of you want to try that. But it’s something to keep in mind anyway :slightly_smiling_face:
1 Like

Yeah I was thinking to add an overlay of the story name at the end of the little “intro” where he stands infront of the school, names overlays sound good too I’ll jus have to figure out first how to create them haha.

1 Like

There’s some great websites that you can use to generate word overlays. The two I’d recommend are:


1 Like

Thanks so much for your help, I’m really grateful!

1 Like

No worries :smiley: Good luck with your story. I’ll def be continuing when you update

1 Like


This topic was automatically closed 30 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.