I really really really like your story and I am going to continue reading it once there is updates.
Cover: I really like the stance of the characters in the cover. It’s really interesting and catches your attention immediately. I do think you could do more with the background to make it more eye catching. But the cover is still pretty good.
Title: I really like your title. It’s to the point and shows what your story is about.
Description: One again I like your description, it automatically makes you wonder about Hero’s true powers and drawn to read your story.
Directing/editing: The first chapter’s editing fell somewhat flat. I felt as if there was too many time skips and didn’t let you get properly introduced to the character.
However, chapter two was amazing. I love how you started off with a flashback which rose our suspension to what has Hero gone through in her past? Also, the directing and dialogue is perfect. Now I really got to see who the characters were and how they react in certain situations. Also big props to you for giving choices on how Hero acts and responds to things. Readers will certainly feel a higher connection to the character because it can resemble their personality. Lastly, you foreshadowed wonderfully giving readers the subtle idea that Hero has extremely strong powers that are soon to come.
Chapter three was when the plot finally began to take off, and it was incredible. I love how specific you are on characters abilities and powers, making us properly understand the setting and plot. Also you had really well plot twists just in chapter three! This will for sure keep reader interested and help you gain views. I was so shocked to learn about her brother and I immediately wanted to know why did he erase her mind? What happened in early on in her life?
Overall: Overall, I can’t wait for the next update of your story. There was a rocky beginning, but the first 50 or so lines on chapter 2 made up for it. Just keep doing what you’re doing, and you’ll certainly attract way for readers.
Rating : 8.5 / 10