If I wrote this story would you read it? Or change it?

I can try a liittle bit.
A lot of what I see in Mafia related stories is your classic bad boy. It’s okay if he kills people I guess since hE haS a tRaumtic pasT. I also see the main LI being completely fine with his Mafia life (which I mean I would be out of there in seconds.) These type of Mafia cliches can be harmful especially to younger audiences. And the way the bad boy treats the LI is kind of toxic. It might help as well if your characters experience consequences for their actions.

The Mafia should be portrayed as it is: dangerous and NOT good. I don’t really know much about the Mafia, but I do know that I’ve never seen it portrayed correctly. You might be able to find some documentaries or articles online.

(You don’t have to read this next part.)

One of the main reasons I started writing/coding my story is because after watching a lot of Marvel movies, I was tired of how the characters could kill people without batting an eye or not experience any real consequences. I wanted my story to subvert those expectations and for my characters to experience the consequences and they won’t be able to kill without thinking twice.

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