hey lol 
all alone
I’ve always loved the urban ambiance. The fast-paced, lively atmosphere. It can be a beautiful thing.
Just as I love the city, I’ve always loved people-watching.
Sitting on my favorite bench in Central Park, one of the many benches along the most populated path, was my favorite pastime.
“Did you hear Maggie’s pregnant?”
“Please, man? I just need a couple more days.”
“Don’t ever call this number again, you-“
I always wore these snippets of conversations I heard, wrapped around me like a blanket– comforting me by filing the silence. I smile softly when I hear passerby’s whisper ridiculousness into their phone, and frown just the same when I hear something heartbreaking. But the feeling never lingers. I usually only hear a sentence or two, after all. Good or bad, I suppose I should be happy I don’t suffer from any long-lasting emotions. If you ask me, I’d say I prefer being an empty shell. What, too morbid?
I cross my legs, leaning further back onto the bench. The weather was comparably poor, rather crisp, cold. I shivered slightly, wrapping my jacket around my body tightly. I had days like these every now and then, where the comfort of noise was nowhere to be found. The only sound gracing my ears was that of the wind. The sound of the city wasn’t nearly as personal, nor was it comforting.
I slipped my phone out of my pocket, reflexively. No new notifications. Sigh. I always did that. Looking for something, anything that would drown out the silence. Anything to distract me, anything to occupy my thoughts. The city was bustling, as usual. But my favorite spot always seemed more dull in the fall.
I took a breath, standing up with my crutch. Slowly making my way down the path. Birds fluttering, the soft sounds of nature clashing with the harsh city noises. As discomforting as it can be, I’m almost grateful for the loud nature of the city. It wasn’t the same as human connection, how could it be? But it held me over. It kept me sane. It eased the pain.
“I love you.”
“I hate you.”
“You really want pizza again ?"
The blanket wrapped tightly, all around me. The soothing noise resuming once again.
God, I love the city.