Looking for someone to review the first chapter


I am in the process of starting a new story and I would greatly appreciate it if anyone is willing to check it out. I would like to know what you think of it and if there is anything I should add or remove in the first chapter so I can know whether the plot is heading into the right direction or not. Just DM me what you thought of it after checking it out.

As a token of appreciation I’ll review the first two chapters of your story and let you know what I think of it and give you advice and help on anything such as: directing, coding, characters, and the plot of the story itself.

If you don’t want to do it, that’s fine. But if you do, I’d greatly appreciate and I will return the favor for your time.

The story is called Aphididae 5051 and it’s about a teenage codebreaker who finds herself involved in a conspiracy involving a private company.

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6042065180688384

This story hasn’t been published yet, but it should still load via link. Let me know if the link doesn’t work. Thanks.