Lyndas Honest Story Review Thread


Need honest feedback on your story? Want to know how you can improve or how to make you story better? Then here is the right place.

UNDERSTAND THAT IM GIVING MY HONEST OPINION AND FEEDBACK (dont get butt hurt)
NO DRAMA
NO BULLYING
I WILL ONLY REVIEW YOUR STORY ONCE. UNLESS YOU COME BACK LATER ON AND SAY YOU FIXED OR CHANGED IT TO MAKE IT BETTER

Review Format:
Link of your story or title of your story
Cover of your story
Your author name
What its about?
What you want out of this review? (Example feedback or ways to improve)
Also i will read the first episodes of your story 1-3 (if i like it then i will read more)
Review waiting list:
@elliewrites.episode (Blurred Lines)
@Unicornlover346 (back to back)
@Unicorngirl2 (captive desire)
@Madhu (Black hearts golden desire)
@Ray_Edwin (My Kalona)
@Geegtfo (Break Away)
@RJGSB (CHAOS)
@2c67e84e97b44cc5bbd3 (Love Pill)
@mollie.stories (Uniformed Saviour)
@Geegtfo Beyond Repair

Stories currently being reviewed:
@RainbowCat (Project Humanity)
@Days ((Un)eligible Bachelor)
@elliewrites.episode (Blurred Lines)
@TLdax913 (Dark Essence)

Stories reviewed:
@Aims1141 Compulsion
@Daddyissues Dirty little secrets
@Days (Un)eligible Bachelor

Best stories reviewed so far:
@Aims1141 Compulsion
@Days (Un)eigible Bachelor

Thought to do this thanks to @xetic love you girl :heart:
Lets get to reviewing.

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LYM girl! :heart:

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:sob::heart:

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Link of your story or title of your story Compulsion. The link is: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6725446713540608
Cover of your story Not made yet!
Your author name Aimee. A
What its about? Zyro Morte is sent on death row. He’s given the chance to extend his time after the FBI need him for a mission. Simple? One problem, he has to jeopardize his soulmates family!?
What you want out of this review?
Your honest opinion and what I can improve on!
Thanks so much!

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Thanks for this thread! I really want to know your opinion about my story! If you can, you can give me some tips! :slight_smile:
The Title: Dirty Little Secret
Author name: Anongirl
Description : Briella Hart, a native Californian new girl in town, finds herself stuck in detention after crossing paths with hall monitor, Grayson Sanders. It’s time for payback!
Link : http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5833300720615424
Cover :
PNG

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Okay your story is first! Im going to read it now! :heart:

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Great! Thanks so much again! :heart:

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I will read your story after @Aims1141 :heart:

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No problem :heart:

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Title of my story: Adventurous: Project Humanity

Cover

Author name: Dreamer
What it’s about: In a world without sadness, your father starts a little project. What happens when you take part in it? Will you find your place in a world with new possibilities, new feelings?
What I want out of this review: Mostly feedback, I’m not sure if I give the right information to make the reader want to read more, or if it’s even understandable what it’s about.

Thank you! :slight_smile:

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Okay will read your story after @Daddyissues :heart:
Currently reading @Aims1141 story!

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Take your time! :slight_smile:

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The Title: Clue: Staples Family On the Double
Author Name: Alyssa
Description: COMING SOON
Link:http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5190338763620352
Cover: COMING SOON
NOT FINISHED WITH !ST EPISODE

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Do you review unpublished stories?

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DAYS OMFGG HIIII!!! I haven’t spoken to you in ages!!!

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Okay @Aims1141 i read all your episodes and here is my honest review.
Episode 1 (customization): i thought it was really cool how you have their names and they moved and stuff. It really made me intrigued. Also i love the splash made by @Mouse.Episode if im correct it was amazing.
Episode 1 (jail scene): I love love love how you introduced your story. Instead of having a chain of splashes you had an amazing opening scene I love the overlays in this scene it helped capture the theme. The music was on point and it wasn’t overwhelming which i really liked. Also i love how you introduced Zyro and Agent jay. Making me what to know more about them. Which is a + when trying to get people to continue to read your story. Showing Zyro and Agent Jays relationship made me curious of what zyro did. Making me want to read more +. And the directing of this scene is so flawless and amazing + :heart:
Episode 1 (Kendra introduced scene) i liked how you showed her and introduce her. And the timed choice a was great asset.
Episode 1 (Zyro walking into bestfriends apartmemt scene):
This scene was sooo funny :joy: i loved how he made that joke as if he was dating Julian it had me dying of laughter. And how the girl was like you deserve better. :joy::joy: Also i like how you didnt just cut to when Zyro banged on the door. But you showed what was happening before Zyro came. Which helped me understand what was going on +. Also you showed Zyro and Julian which helped with character development. Making me more intrigued in each character.
Episode 1 (hair dying scene):
I loved this scene it really helped develop Julian. Also the mirror scene really took it to another level +. I seen many stories do it but sometimes it looked funny with you it ran so smoothly and looked great. And i know it takes a lot work to do that and many people don’t notice/ know that. I loved the hair dye overlays they were so cute and funny. And really help show what was going on +. Also i loved how juilian threw the gun out the window and it hit agent jay that was really funny. And the coding there was spectacular +❤
Episode 2 (Kendra and Salima) i loved how you introduced Salima she seems like a very cool character. You can really see that they care for each other. Even if Kendra can be crazy sometimes. Also i like how Kendra is curious about what her parents do which makes me want to read more to find out +.
Episode 2 (dinner scene): I love how the choices you make can reflect what happens. Very good addition :heart: Also can i just say her parents are asses:joy: Asher is asshole and her mother just stands their and doesnt say nothing. I makes me want to know what happened and why are they like that towards Kendra +. Especially when telling her that what she wants to do as a job and stuff is wrong.
Episode 2 (spying on father):
It makes me really curious on how powerful her parents are +.
Episode 2 (Zyro and Kendra):
The way the meet was pretty cool. I like how it should that they may have more to say about each other in the future +. And how Zyro blackmailed her to help him. And umm Kendra shot him! Kendra got alot to her :joy: which i like :heart: Also ANGELA SLID IN HIS DMS. Im dead :joy:
Episode 2 (Julian in car scene): This was so funny and showed that Julian is really funny and also has more to him. And that he knows more about whats going on. Making me want to know more about him. And the song he was listening to had me dead :joy::skull:
Episode 2 (drug deal): The person who was suppose to give 50k to the guy have me dying. He was so funny. And the fact that he said fuck this shit im out had me dead The worker dude also sees Kendra which can create a problem in the future.
Episode 3: I love the Zyros bitch phone call overlay with agent jay on the toilet it was so funny. And very cool. I lile how we were able to click on the phone for Zyro to pick it up +. Very good touch! Angela told agent jay that Zyro pulled a gun on Kendra. That had me shook :joy: Also the fact that we know that family is Zyros weakest it really makes me want to read more to know about what happened in his past +.
Episode 3 (Miriam): Miriam took me by surpise because i thought she was just chill. But she may be related to Zyro which makes me want to read more and know why she was shocked by finding it was Zyro and that he has a death sentence.

Overall: i love love love you story 10/10 It was so so great. And my pleasure to read it. Your episodes are not short and very well directed. Overlays amazing. Zooms amazing. Characters amazing. It reminds me of amazing stories like adrenaline or framed. I really enjoyed it. I cant wait to see your story get big one day. If you make anymore episodes please let me know i would love to read them again. You should be very proud of yourself :heart:

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yes i do! :heart:

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OMG HEEYYY! I have been off the forums for a while as life has been kinda crazy but how have you been girl?

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Aw brilliant - here is a link to it (I need to warn you there are a handful of errors but I wanna look more at the readability)

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What its about?
What you want out of this review? (Example feedback or ways to improve)
Just the format of a review request.

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