🍵 Merlin's story review and proofreading for all stories [CLOSED]

Brutally honest!

Reviews and proofreading.

Perhaps you’re a new writer who needs guidance or maybe you’re an experienced author who needs second opinnion? Please fill all the requirements below. This thread is not for R4R

Please make sure you carefully read all the information that is required for the reviewing/proofreading! So that I don’t need to separately ask you to fill all the requitements.

Pending The longer the line the longer it takes to get a review. Be patient

What will you get?

  • Review on first chapter
  • Constructive review
  • Help with coding
  • Honest opinnion as a reader and as a writer
  • Helpful tips
  • General guidance
  • Friendly and professional communication
  • Posting review here down in the comments section
  • Posting positive review on my Instagram page @episode.merlin
  • i also work with epy.bellisimas and the stories that impress me the most will get a shoutout from their page!

What do I review?


I will write the summary combining the following:

  • Story lenght (short/long)
  • Coding (mistakes/errors/zoom/speech bubble/narrator/direct spoting)
  • Script (makes sense/easy to follow)
  • General flow of the script (slow/fast)
  • Character build-up (how many/how relatable/development/personalities)
  • Choices (how many/how complex)
  • Art (cover/art scenes)
  • Backgrounds
  • Animations
  • CC
  • Overlays
  • Does it make me want to read more than one chapter?

What do you need to do? -> Read carefully!


Fill all the requited information because it’s important for me to be able to recommend your story or find it from the app in case the link doesn’t work:

  • Story title
  • Genre
  • Story description
  • Your Instagram @
  • Your Episode user
  • Story cover
  • Link to your story

What do I expect from the writer?


Do not apply for a review if not agreeing with the following!

  • Professionality
  • Friendly communication
  • Ability to accept any constructive critisism
  • Accepting help
  • Active feedback
  • Credit

For more Episode related content/reviews/interviews/tips/tricks and future projects follow me on IG @episode.merlin
I also work with @epy.bellisimas and the stories that impress me the most will get a shoutout from their IG page!


Ended review for @EtherealWitch
IG @aite.writes

1 Like

Hi! would you please review my story?
Story title: Under the Starlight.
Genre: Drama, Mystery
My episode user: @Ashh.episode
Here’s the story description:
The story is about an agent, the youngest and one of the best in the agency. She is assigned to protect an emotionally-unavailable loverboy. Emabark on a secret mission with her, disguised as a college student, who know maybe you’ll find love on the way, and maybe answers-to the puzzles posed by some deeply buried secrets.
I don’t have an instagram account and i Dont have the story covers in this device rn, so sorry for that :sweat_smile:
Here’s the link to my story :slight_smile:

1 Like

To be burtally honest
I have nothing to say really. The story is great. I would definitely continue reading it.
But there are a few things I want to pont on.

  • Always have speech bubbles away from faces. There was a few accidents like that but nothing that can’t be fixed by simply moving them for particular scene.
1 Like

To be brutally honest
Coding is nice, practically no errors.
I find the idea of the story is extremely really good but there are a few things I want to point on.

  • Spoting error in the beginning when leaving caffeteria.
  • Chapter is too long. Nothing significant happens durning scenes. Cut the long conversations and devide them between chapters so the work and coding won’t get lost. The perfect lenght for a chapter is up to 3000 lines. It makes your work easier and also makes following the story much smoother.
  • Not enough choiches for such long chapter. So it gets boring eventually.
  • Add more action.
  • Unexpected ending. Add cliff hangers, personal touch and promotion to the end. For example narrator text “The end of the first chapter”.
  • I recommend for the cliff hanger have the two dreamers meet in the end of the chapter one. Doing so will guarantee that the readers will want to read for more. It also makes things interesting.

I love the idea. I’m a big fan of any kind of big love stories. Especially such mystical romance ones but would I continue to read it as it is right now? No,

Thank you very much!

1 Like

Oh and one more thing. The dreamers don’t really have to meet but you could make the readers think that they met. Make it as one big dream. Then either of them wakes up in the behinning of chapter 2 so there is no actual real meeting irl :grinning:


I would like a review, :green_heart:

1 Like

Thank you so much I appreciate you for helping me out :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: :heavy_heart_exclamation:

1 Like

To be brutally honest
I will contact you in IG for better guidance and help on this story.
The idea of the story is good. Characters are all fine but I must point on various things.

  • Cover is not the greatest. Change the face of the MC on the cover because at the moment it is not appealing. I would also change the text part and make it a bit more sofisticated. Maybe make it girlier since the story is about girl in the man’s world.
  • Story description should include love interest.
  • Laggy beginning. Confusing. Too much of the blinking and flashing. Narrator text placement too low. Cut the cover from the beginning and change the “Turn up the volume” part because it was not readable due to the flashing. Better to find something more simple for the volume part.
  • CC on love interest gets lost after choosing body type and jumps back into default settings so basically there is no CC on that particular character. Find the error. Or bring choosing the body type in front of the CC.
  • Speech bubble errors -> they are often out of the frame, covering faces and at least in one case the text was out of the frame of the speech bubble. Use custom settings on the speech bubbles and correct their placement and size.
  • Character hight difference compared to backgrounds. Characters are either too big or too small for their background. They are often too big/small compared to each other. Always match your character to you backgrounds and any other characters.
  • Characters out of the frame. Use direct spoting to bring them away from the edges of the screen.
  • Overlay errors -> Find better overlays. Make sure you place them into right layers. One of the current ovelays is just a cut-out with white a square around it and this is a big no-no! Resize the overlays to match their surroundings and the hight of the characters.
  • Restaurant scene too long and nothing significant happens turning that time. Also check for the hight difference in the restaurant. Guys are somehow much bigger than the girls although guys spot behind the girls. The more far behind the object the smaller it is. So the guys should be smaller and the girls should be bigger. Also one of the guys is out of the frame. Use direct spoting to correct their hight and placement.
  • Chapter too long. Cut the long dialouges and devide them between the chapters so your work and coding won’t get lost. Perfect amount of lines would be up to 2000-3000 lines (excluded CC). This will make your work easier and the story much more readable.
  • In the beginning you say if “I have some mistake let me know”. This is also a big no-no! Delete it. Readers are not your reviweres. Correcting any mistakes turning published story will mess it up for the current readers. They would have to read the last read chapter again and nobody wants to do that. You want to keep every reader you have. This is why it is so important to fix everything before publishing and have it all proof read and reviewed.

Would I continue to read it as it is? No

1 Like

Okay thank for the review will make those changes

1 Like

Up. Up

Hi. I’d like a review.

Story Title: Viral
Genre: Mystery
Story Description: After a pandemic mysteriously displaces you and your friends’ parents, you determinedly seek them out - only to discover their disappearances were just the beginning…
Instagram: N/A

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/4518230484647936


1 Like

Sounds good.
You should really get an IG account :smiley: you’re missing out. Most of the community is there.

1 Like

I want to, but I don’t know how to get followers and I don’t really have a steady update schedule haha

I’ll definitely look into it, though

You’ll get them by following them or promoting your IG acount in the end of every chapter of your story.

That’s true, I think the only thing holding me back is the fact I don’t have many readers anyway.

Thanks for your advice :slight_smile:

1 Like

Hey! You already helped me with your interview ideas. I hope you won’t mind giving me second opinion.

Title: Shado
Author: Roy
Description: After tragedy, Roy returns to civilization a changed women. She begins her crusade, determined to put things right, with the help of her trusted people,waging a one-woman on crime
Instagram : roy_episode
Genre : Action
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5108744574074880

1 Like

Over all it’s a nice story and I liked it. I’m gonna take a screen shot and post it on my IG!

Positive side of the first chapter

  • Nice beginning
  • Nice cc
  • Nice choices
  • I like the point system and the complexity of it!
  • I like the theme of the virus
  • Correct overlays and speechbubles
  • Correct coding
  • Nice backgrounds

Down side of the firts chapter

  • The chapter is way too long!!
1 Like