Need some help with story description!

Hey guys! Need some help coming up with a good, yet concise enough description for an action story I’m about to write with a friend. Here’s some background info to help:

Holden, the male main character, is a detective who gets fired from his job after going too far to investigate his father’s mysterious death. He got too obsessed trying to figure out the killer that he became unbearable to work with and crossed some boundaries. Even after getting fired, he wants to continue to investigate but since he can’t get help from the cops anymore, he somehow ends up connecting the case to a gang and decides to get help from its rival gang (which is the female main character, Sage’s gang. What they don’t know yet is that they’ve had a past together, when they were kids.

Let me know if you need any more info to come up with a better description :slight_smile:

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Before I make your summary more concise I guess my main concern is what do you mean by materialistic? Based on your description alone of Holden it seems a bit out of place…? What I am really trying to say is that what you really meant and if so how materialistic is he?

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Well, I guess that part of his description really isn’t necessary for the summary so I guess I should take that out. I took this chunk out from the whole storyline we wrote out so I forgot to take that work out :joy:

Okay so let’s try this:

Consumed with the desire to uncover the truth about the dubious circumstances shrouding his Father’s death Detective Holden finally snaps and crosses the line. After his severance from police force there is now nothing holding him back. The case leads him into the criminal underbelly where he allies himself with Sage, a fierce gang leader with a cryptic past to discover the truth.

So how does this sound?

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that sounds amazing! But I’m afraid it’ll go over the character limit of 180 :grimacing:

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There is a character limit of 180…darn that sucks. Let me see what I can reduce it to!

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ik! they definitely need to make the word count longer, it’s too short :woman_facepalming:

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Okay it is not as fancy sadly :sweat_smile: but I am pretty sure it is under 180 characters

Consumed with investigating his Father’s death Detective Holden crosses the line. Now jobless the case leads him into allying himself with Sage, a gang leader with a past.

They should really make the summary a bit longer it seems really hard to boil a story down into two sentences…

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it fits! I absolutely love it, thank you sm for helping me out :blue_heart::blue_heart:

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Of course! I wish you good luck with your story! :blush:

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