NEW FEATURED STORY: My First Everything


#143

Can I just say that
A) It’s driving me literally insane how it keeps switching between spotlight version and normal version. Like please. Stop. You’re not Choices.
B) Shane and Ryder (Shana and idk) legit have no lives and just follow the mc around like puppies. If someone I liked couldn’t choose between me and some guy I’d be like “Well I guess I’m not good enough for you to decide” and then I’d leave them.
C) This story is so awfully written I really hope it’s a parody otherwise I don’t know what Episode has sunken to.
D) Shane is the dumbest person of all time. Why tf did he date Amanda in the first place??? And why did he only start actually talking to you after you had Ryder’s attention?? Like, I get they’re trying to portray he’s jealous, but this is too much
E) One thing I am gonna say that’s positive is: OMG I literally love the best friend. She’s utterly goals and I just want her as my bestie. Like can someone send her to me???
F) The intro made no sense at all. I think we all can agree on this point. It was just so much information and the main character legit said “Who are you?” to her best friend… Like wut.
G) What the actual frick is wrong with the police officer? I don’t think it’s legal to arrest me if Ryder won’t come out of my house (when technically, I don’t even want him there)
H) Where is the main character’s mom while all this is going down??
I) “I’ve been wanting to tell him I liked him ever since Kindergarten but I back out every year. This is my last chance”… Gurl I don’t even need to tell you how crazy you are I think this phrase speaks for itself.
J) “You punched your dad???” Well first off, he looked 100% like a burglar / serial killer and secondly, he’s been following me everywhere like some creep. Um sir how do you not know where your own house is? Do you really need to follow your daughter to figure it out? You know you can text your wife? Even tho you’ve been gone for 17 years which sounds totally realistic.
K) Why can’t I customize Shane? He’s ugly.
L) Amanda looks like a blonde fake biatch with a heavy spray tan. Gurl get a grip. Btw I don’t think wearing a red club dress to school everyday is “appropriate attire”
M) So… Lemme get this straight… You and Ryder live in identical but totally different houses in identical but totally different neighborhoods? Okay. Sure.
N) Why did Ryder/Shane even accept to be Amanda’s date? Like, just because you can’t be mine doesn’t mean you have to go with the bitchiest of them all.
O) Hehehe I kissed Shane in front of Ryder just to annoy him
P) So… Why is Ryder allowed to walk around school shirtless again?
Q) Did Shane have botox?
R) “I’m trying to pay attention to what the professor is saying” gurl this is literally the only scene where you’re in a classroom.
S) Where is the rest of the school? Oh right, it’s Spotlight.
T) Amanda your face is fat.
U) Gurl there are doors behind you yet you ask “Who’s at the door?”
V) I don’t like your underwear Camille. It’s tacky.
W) Poor Neal, I liked your onesie tho.
X) “Are you guys twins?”
“How did you know?”
“It’s definitely the jackets.”
Yup it’s definitely the jackets btw I love you background character gurl
Y) Who buys a 2 million dollar guitar? Buy rap snacks instead.
Z) Just because I wanted to finish the alphabet.
AND THAT’S 26 REASONS WHY… Idk.


#144

I’ve only just read the first chapter but I’m going to have to agree very strongly about this:

I like to try and be polite and subtle about things I don’t like but there are no words better than insanely awful story. It is so poorly written and it’s moving on way too fast.
The characters have minimal depth and we know nothing about them. They’re incredibly shallow and Episode doesn’t do anything to make me like them - they create no bond between reader and characters.
Parody or not, this could have been done a lot better.
Also, I couldn’t agree more with this:

Awful intro. I was so confused. I honestly have no words for how confusing it was to me.

Also, the Spotlight thing kind of confused me but it may be because I just prefer normal version. However, I just don’t think Spotlight fits this story.


#145

^All that :skull:


#146

So as shallow as much of this story is, it does occasionally make me laugh. The “bad bae” love interest asks the MC to prom by setting the grass on her front lawn on fire in the shape of the word PROM. WTH??? What a complete weirdo. Thankfully, you can make the MC react like, “What’s wrong with you!? Call the fire department!” Such an pathetically awkward and misguided display of affection. Ladies love when you light their lawns on fire!

There was also a moment where you can distract a gym teacher by claiming you see a shark in the locker room, and he runs away. Then the narration says, “It would be years before he realized there was in fact no shark.” :laughing:

I wish they just scrapped the romantic overtures and fully embraced the parody.


#147

Isn’t that a Fall Out Boy reference? I think they did that for one of their music videos.


#148

It wouldn’t surprise me. Was it a romantic gesture there too?


#149

It also happened to be a parody of high school cliches, so tick for Episode?


#150

So…

this latest chapter is embarrassing.

LOL


#151

Well that’s umm, such a unique gesture…

He could have caused her house to burn down lol.


#152

Shane looks like Shane Dawson, and it makes me wanna vomit a lil in my mouth each time lmao. Shana does too (lol the name and being an equally ugly female counterpart)


#153

I think I have officially warmed to this ridiculous story. In the latest chapter, I filibustered my way to a jailbreak by boring a cop to sleep and then sneaking past him. :upside_down_face:


#154

My feelings are mix with this story, because I haven’t decided if it’s a parody or not.
The writing is god awful, directing is amateur for a featured story, the back and forth from spotlight to normal sometimes gives me a headache, the characters are over the top ridiculous, and the story is filled with maximum cliches! However, I find myself very entertain by it. Reminds me of Not Another Teens Movie, except it’s a parody.

The story is so laughable bad that Episode should just change the genre from Romance to Comedy and promote it as a parody/satire story!


#155

I agree. I wish they would give up on the parts that are supposed to be romantic and just embrace the parody. I think this story is most entertaining when it allows itself to be truly absurd.


#156

I don’t understand why they wouldn’t do that to begin with when the thing they say about it is exactly that “this is a satire, with a point to parody the bad boy cliche” …lol

I am not the most observant, so I didn’t realize that it was in the wrong category, but it totally is a satire. lol