Opinions on story description

I am currently working on my story Shadows of the Elite and was wondering if the description would pull readers in:

Description: A death sparks a transfer, romance, and secrets. Can Narelle handle it all?

  • Yes I would read the story!
  • It could be tweaked…
0 voters

I tried to keep it short :sweat_smile:
If you chose the latter, feel free to leave opinions down below👇

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I like the title it actually pulls in really well, I would make the description a little more in depth if possible.


I love the title!
If you need any help with the description let me know :slight_smile:

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Thank you, I debated the title with another one, good to know ppl like it!

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The description is too short and vague in my opinion :sweat_smile:
Can you share a longer plot synopsis? Then I’d be easier to help you create a longer description :smiling_face:

So the idea of the story is a girl named Narelle(as mentioned in the description) and her best friend dies, which ofc causes her to spiral and make bad decisions. Roughly after a month of her friend dying Narelle’s mother has had enough of her antics and sends her to live and go to school in her grandmother’s hometown. Most of the story will take place in the school setting.

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Love the idea! Here are some description ideas:

  • Devastated by loss, Narelle’s bad choices force a fresh start as her mother sends her away. Can a new town & love mend her shattered heart?

  • Her best friend’s death leads Narelle to a low place. In order to bring her back up, her mother decides to send her away. Is this a chance to heal the broken pieces?

  • After losing her best friend, Narelle hits rock bottom. Having enough of her daughter’s bad decision, Narelle’s mother sends her away. Can a new place and a special someone help her rise again?

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These are good thank you! I will take them into consideration

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I personally like the description and name. There are things that could be added to make your description a little stronger but it’s really good!

Thank you!

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