Portraying Polyamorous Relationships/ Polygamy

Community Episode Fan Community
1

So, I’m an Indian and polygamy is illegal over here. As a child, I thought that it’s illegal all over the world. However, during this pandemic I came through some YouTube channels which show and interview people in a polyamorous relationship. Most of them were a married couple and another person. But then, I saw a video where three people get married. So, now that it involved law, I thought of doing some research and found that it is legal is many parts of world.

I’ve always been against such relationships 'cause in ancient India, kings had many wives, which lead to horrible consequences as it involves “sharing a person”. Let me be honest, I’m not at all open-minded when it comes to such relations. That’s why I want opinions and views.

Honestly, I could’ve done research on Google but I wanted opinions and discussions by people in a platform where diversity is so huge. So, I want your views on polyamorous/polygamous relationships.

  • What are your views on such relationships?
  • Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?
  • In which part of the world is this cool?
  • Some tips on portraying such relationships.
  • Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?
  • Why are you against/ in favour of these relationships being portrayed?
  • Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?

Also, add things that you wanna add apart from these.

EDIT:

Let me clear out the difference between polygamy and polyamory.

Polyamory

20210912_080829
20210912_080829720×833 48 KB

Polygamy

20210912_080850
20210912_080850720×421 49.3 KB

Polygamy is also both ways just like polyamory. One woman with many men and one man with many women- is polygamy while two men, two women is polyamory. Also, polygamy is the term which is used when they are married.

9 Likes
2

But again this is just my opinion if anyone out there is in this type of Relationships and are happy and comfortable then good 4 you and hope it works out

Sincerely
Ren ®

I don’t know why I just signed that but thought it would be fun :joy:

1 Like
3

I think if are over 18 people have the right to be in any consensual reletionship no matter how it is, and this case all adults, properly all agree on it, its not cheating, let them be happy

but personally I dont like this

personally no,

Dont know any really, its not the norm.

Like any reletionship I think trust, honeasty play a big role.

personally no

I am not against, its just not a thing I have an interest in.

properly not more than the mafia stories about drugs murder and kidnaping.

2 Likes
4

I’m not opposed to polyamory in fact i don’t really believe humans were meant to be monogamous creatures although im not like a major advocate for polyamory because I think that it takes a lot for it to work out and definitely not suited for everyone. Im not a fan of polygamy when it’s like one man has many wives, but i don’t see anything wrong with relationships that have more than two people. It would take a lot of communication and a lot of boundaries for it to work but if you can make it work and everyone in the relationship is happy im all for it. I’ve also thought about having a polyamorous ending for one of the endings in some of my stories but didn’t think it would be well received. But yeah I’d read a story with a polyamorous relationship if i liked the story. As far as impacting young readers It really depends on how it’s portrayed. Again if it’s a healthy relationship with lots of communication i don’t think so but i can see it becoming an issue easily.

A lot of people talk about it in the sense that you’re “sharing” your person with i kinda dislike as an idea i don’t like to think of it like you’re sharing anything because there should be mutual understanding from all sides which is why it would be a lot of work and take a lot of communication. I personally don’t like to think of my monogamous relationships as we belong to each other. We don’t we are our own individuals who choose to exist together love each other and support each other and i don’t see why we couldn’t choose to love support and exist with more people. Even if you do think about it like “we belong to each other” than all of you should belong to each other and you should all be each other’s person. I don’t think the relationship would work out if you loved one person more than the others or had one person you thought of as your own with others tagging along. But then again as long and there is a mutual understanding who am i to say

You could also think about it in terms of an open relationship where two people are in a relationship but are cool with each other seeing other people which again takes a lot of communication and boundaries to work

With that being said i don’t really know a lot about polygamy/polyamory or their history that’s just kinda my general thoughts on relationships with more than two people in them

4 Likes
5

My general consensus on the matter. One thing I’ll note, OP, is I believe you’re conflating the two when they’re different in practice. To my understanding, polygamy is the act of taking multiple spouses; and culturally, in many countries, this manifests as one male with multiple wives under a sort of hierarchy. Polyamory, on the other hand, is having/desiring multiple partners in a mutually consensual relationship. This may manifest as a four-person relationship where everyone is dating and supporting each other; person A, B, and C in a relationship where person A dates persons B and C but persons B and C only date person A while still aware of the other; two spouses in an open relationship; or a multitude of other ways. The main difference being the consent and equality present in polyamory that may be lacking or absent altogether in polygamy. People who are actually polyamorous, please correct me if necessary. I’m not a fan of polygamy as I’ve generally seen it used as a patriarchal device to overpower, usually young, women, though not always. I’ll answer the rest of your questions with polyamory in mind, then.

  • Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?

I wouldn’t mind it if I thought the charcters in the relationship all suited each other and were mature enough to handle it. I will say: I’ve read my fair share of stories where the two male love interests had just as much chemistry with each other (probably more) as they did with the MC, and the whole plot would honestly have been a lot more interesting if they all realized that.

  • In which part of the world is this cool ?

I can only speak from experience as a northerner in the U.S., but I think most in my area would be indifferent to or passively against it. This may be something more socially acceptable on the west coast but likely not in the South.

  • Some tips on portraying such relationships.

I’m not sure. Research, as usual, comrade.

  • Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?

Once again, if it suited them.

  • Why are you against/in favour of these relationships being portrayed?

I’m indifferent.

  • Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?

Portraying accurately? No.

4 Likes
6

Thank you for making that distinction between polygamy and polyamory! I conflated the two as well and polyamory is definitely what i was referring to in my original post

3 Likes
7

This is so interesting. I need to comment!

Honestly, I don’t understand them. I really don’t. I can’t picture a functional relationship between more than two people and if someone came up to and told me that they’re in a polyamorous relationship, I’d gape at them. I wouldn’t shame or hunt down anyone over this at the end of the day, though. Never. I’m a tolerant guy.
The fact that I don’t understand or disagree with it doesn’t mean I’ll be a jerk.

I mean, why not? They’re a thing in real life. I’m portraying one myself in my ongoing story, Never Too Late. It’s a cool challenge; depicting something you don’t quite relate to and kinda disapprove of in a positive manner. Whether we like it or not, these relationships exist, so I wouldn’t mind if I saw more stories like that.

Probably nowhere. Most people don’t take polyamorous relationships seriously. Society calls it cheating and letting your partner cheat.

The same tip I’d give to anyone writing stories about anything. Please, make all the characters involved three-dimensional. Give them an actual personality. Additionally, if you feel like it, acknowledge the issues these relationships face, both intimately and socially.

Absolutely. I’m open-minded. However, it has to be portrayed in a way I can get behind, which means I want developed characters… and I’m very picky.

I’m in favour because there’s nothing inherently wrong with these relationships. Everything is consensual. The people in these relationships are valid and don’t bother anyone.

HAHAHAHA young people read things like My Bad Mafia Boy, Pregnant By My Teacher and In My Bed!!! It would be a little unfair for anyone to say that this would hurt young reader when the app is what it is.

7 Likes
8
  • What are your views on such relationships?

It is definitely not for me and I wouldn’t do it. However, if it is fine with other people and it isn’t harming anyone else then let them do them so long they are happy.

  • Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?

Personally no as I am not comfortable with it. However if you do I am sure there will be people who are interested!

  • In which part of the world is this cool ?

I’m not that sure…

  • Some tips on portraying such relationships.

Especially since you aren’t that sure about certain things on this topic , research is really key. This way you can portray polygamy accurately.

  • Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?

Once again personally no, but I’m sure there will be others who are interested!

  • Why are you against/ in favour of these relationships being portrayed?

I’m just not comfortable with it and it isn’t my cup of tea… :sweat_smile: However I do support those who choose to go this route as it doesn’t harm others and it makes them happy.

  • Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?

Depends on the maturity of the reader. But then again there are so many stories about getting pregnant, kidnapping, intimate scenes in various stories that if you portray polygamy properly and accurately it is not gonna do much harm. If anything it could even educate them.

2 Likes
9

Hope that helps

1 Like
10

I find this interesting too so I’d like to share my opinions!

  • What are your views on such relationships?
My Answer

In my early years, I never knew polyamory and polygamy existed. At first, I didn’t understand.

But now I’ve come to realize why people are in polyamorous relationships, and the reason being is they don’t find all they need and want in a relationship just from one person; they find them in multiple peoples instead.

  • Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?
My Answer

Yes, of course. As long as it shows a healthy balance between all the involved people in the relationship and does not degrade other people for not being in a polyamorous relationship.

It’s very very important that this is portrayed in a healthy way in Episode stories, for young readers to understand (who have never been exposed to his kind of relationship before).

  • In which part of the world is this cool ?
My Answer

The United States of America. Of course other parts of the world too.

  • Some tips on portraying such relationships.
My Answer

I’m not an expert on polyamory but I’ll think of some tips.

  • Include bi/pan people
  • All people in the relationship consent
  • Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?
My Answer

I usually vision the main character as myself so it depends. Because I am monogamous, I would not choose that lifestyle. But if it’s an interesting story, sure!

  • Why are you against/ in favour of these relationships being portrayed?
My Answer

I am in favour of it, but also think the writer should be cautious.

  • Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?
My Answer

Young people (typically, not all the time) have not heard of polyamory and polygamy. A negative impact it would have is if the reader isn’t able to have the choice to be in such relationship or not.

As well as seeing jealousy.

I would like to say: I’m not saying polyamory is a bad thing at all.

People have different preferences and it’s okay. I myself could never be in that kind of relationship, but people who want to, it’s okay. Different people see love in different ways.

3 Likes
11

Polygamy is not necessarily when it is “one man, many women”. Yes, in ancient India, this was generally practised and that was because kings were in battles and had to make as many descendents as possible. Also, for making alliances with as many kingdoms as possible. I’m not trying to justify this patriarchal practice but as for the definition- polygamy is of two types- polygyny and polyandry. Refer to the edit part of the 1st post for details.

For this, I’ve seen a lot of videos, in which not everyone likes each other. One was a relationship of a pansexual, homosexual and straight person (these are the terms they used for themselves). I don’t know if this was at all mutual or if this is what mutual means (they were kind of friends, tho did not share a great bond).

Thanks for this. :hugs:

I honestly never thought of it like this- so thanks :blush::hugs:

In literally every video that I’ve seen- they’ve confessed that they are jealous when they see their love with the other person. So, I think, portraying that it necessary. However, in a healthy way, I guess?

2 Likes
12

Haha wow yeah, from what polyamorous people I’ve seen, they say “I don’t like jealousy” or argue that jealousy isn’t good and they should be more “free”. But no, you’re absolutely right. I see you’ve done research.

2 Likes
13

To be honest I’m not opposed like their love life ain’t my buisness.

I’ll just simply stop reading that story once and for all!

Got no idea! But I live in India and during the kings times they had many wives and stuff. SO I’M NOT A FAN OF THAT RELATIONSHIP

None

If it does make sense to me it’s fine?

I have nothing like that but probably in the middle

To be honest I don’t know maybe? cause they might think that you can juggle around two boys/girl together?

3 Likes
14

I’m more or less not a fan of it and against a polygamous relationship. I’m not even sure how it can be a healthy relationship. There is a show (don’t remember the name) about women escape those types of relationships.

Sure why not. It’s fictional after all.

From my research polygamy is cool in some African and Middle Eastern countries, but every other country it is (at best) frowned upon or (at worst) illegal and criminalizing.

:man_shrugging:

I’m not sure, depending on the story I guess.

No legitimate reason that I can think of.

I would say yes.

3 Likes
15

I’m an anthropology major and none of my research has ever indicated that early H. sapiens or any member of the Homo genus were polyamorous.

3 Likes
16

Good to know! Like I said I said im not super Educated on the topic, just spilling my thoughts

2 Likes
17

No problem.

1 Like
18
  • What are your views on such relationships?
    What goes on in someone else’s love life is none of my business. I’m a little older than most of you guys, but really, what you think is “weird” or “immoral” to someone else is completely normal and accepted. If it doesn’t involve you or affect you, mind your business (respectfully. lol)
  • Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?
    I think as long as research is done and you don’t let your own biases affect the way you portray the characters, it would be an interesting idea as it’s uncommon on the app.
  • In which part of the world is this cool ?
    I’m from the US and while not totally common, there are religions that go by the ‘old’ ways and a man can have several wives-- although to avoid legal issues, they usually marry one legally then ‘marry’ others in a ‘religious ceremony’ without getting an actual marriage license. People have strong opinions on religions like this - they either think its weird/wrong/‘unnatural’ and then there is a majority of people who believe as I do : mind your business. :joy: And there are unreligious poly relationships out there as well that have nothing to do with a religion. so :woman_shrugging:
  • Some tips on portraying such relationships.
    Don’t portray it as ‘creepy’ or ‘weird’ or rife with jealousy. People who are in such relationships tend to be very accepting of all parties and have a ‘schedule’ of sorts to keep time spent among the couple ‘equal’ (I.e. 3 days a week for independent time for each partner with alternations every other week on the 7th day, Specified date nights or anniversaries. Others really don’t split their time and prefer to be all together.)
    Best advice is do research, check out blogs and youtube and interviews etc. and make your characters WHOLE people-- don’t define them as just their love life.
  • Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?
    Depends on the premise of the story. Would I want to watch a bunch of jealous, hateful people who constantly vie for the time of the 3rd. No.But, if it wasn’t like that, I’d give it a shot.
  • Why are you against/ in favour of these relationships being portrayed?
    I think it would maybe help people learn that there are more than one type of relationships. I would still advice that you need to do research and fully develop your story and characters.
  • Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?
    It depends on how its done. If you treat the polyamorous characters the same way you would treat a straight or gay/bi/trans characters relationships and personalities, I wouldn’t see how it would negatively affect anyone.
    If you make it toxic af and horribly biased, I think that would negatively affect readers and make them less accepting of other peoples’ choices.
3 Likes
19

Honestly, religion does not bother me, but what bothers me is law.

Well, jealousy is there in such relations. We cannot just ignore it (I’m saying it after watching interviews). But I think it’s portrayal should be in correct proportions.

It is exactly like that (at least for the initial days).

20

This is very interesting so I’ll share my thoughts.

What are your views on such relationships?

I think that as long as the participants are consenting adults, it’s okay. But for me, who has grown up around only monogamous people, it is kind of alien.

Would you want them to be portrayed in an Episode Story?

It would definitely be interesting, yes! It would also be great representation for people in these relationship, if done correctly.

In which part of the world is this cool?

I can’t speak for other parts of the world, but some parts of my country is highly conservative, so it will definitely be frowned upon.

Some tips on portraying such relationships.

While I don’t much about it, I would love to see believable and realistic characters. I want to be shown why they’re in that relationship. I don’t want to see characters who are there only because they are characters in a polyamorous/polygamy relationship; I want to understand them, to sympathize with their decision, and to understand a little more about those kind of relationships and how they function.

Would you read a story where the MC is in such a relationship?

While I personally will not choose for myself that relationship, I will find it interesting. What would give drive me to actually read it, though, is if I think it has good writing, or if it has elements that I love seeing in stories.

Why are you against/ in favour of these relationships being portrayed?

I am not very good at sharing the person I love, especially since the concept of monogamy is so deeply ingrained in my brain already.

Do you think portraying these would have a negative impact on the young readers?

It will definitely impact them, but not necessarily negative. I think it would give them perspective of how the world works, that yes, some people are in this types of relationships and it works. It would definitely be a make it or break it thing, where it’s one or the other.

2 Likes