R4R- Read my story and I'll read yours! *Honest feedback!* [CLOSED]

Hey guys! After a two year hiatus, I’ve just published my first story! I’m super excited about it and I would love to have your opinion. Once you read my story, follow the format I used for my story (below :arrow_down:) and I will read the first three episodes and give you honest feedback! Thank you in advance! :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

EDIT: I AM LOOKING FOR DETAILED REVIEWS OF MY STORY. I THOROUGHLY REVIEW THE STORIES YOU LEAVE ME, AND I WOULD LIKE THE SAME FOR MINE! THANKS!

Title: Idolized
Author: Linnie R.
Genre Drama/Comedy/Adventure
Episodes: 4 (ongoing)
Episode Description: After meeting a mysterious man during a girls trip to Las Vegas, you find yourself tangled in international celebrity drama. How will you fare as you face limelight and love? CC
Full Description: During a girls trip to Las Vegas, you meet a mysterious man in a night club. Turns out he’s a runaway South Korean pop star, and it’s up to you to save him. What will happen as you enter the South Korean limelight and start to fall in love?
Bonus: Customize YOURSELF & THREE FRIENDS!
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6045484953436160

Half my characters are South Korean and half my story takes place in South Korea, so if you can help me with Korean honorifics and other aspects of Korean language/culture, I will give you a shout-out in my story! I tried my best with it-please understand that I mean no harm with anything I may have gotten wrong! I want my story to be as realistic as possible.

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Moved to Promote Your Story since this is for R4Rs. Make sure to check out our Forum Tutorial for more info about where to correctly create topics, and feel to PM me if there are any questions. :wink:

Sounds good! interested in a R4R?

Yes please! What’s your story’s details?

Just Published my new story Tyre Pressure. I’d love it if you checked it out. I put alot of time and effort into this.

Description:
Tessa, a skilled mechanic, gets the client of a lifetime when billionaire Reid Hodge brings his car to her garage. How will things play out?

Covers:


Link:

Ty! @ND.epy (My Insta)

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Ooo, looks good! I’ll give it a read and come back with my review! :blush:

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I’ll do the same

Let’s do r4r

MY story The Star Necklace

Description: you are the most rich girl in your country in addition you’re famous but what happens when the Star Necklace uncovers your true identity

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I’ve read 3 episodes. But my passes ran out… so far it’s such a good story! Great directing and a pretty original plot/narrative. Cant wait for more.
Proof:

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Hey I would love to do a r4r with you! :blush:

Story Name: Loving Desire
Author: L.R
Genre: Action
Status: 5 episodes (more coming)
Style: INK
Description: Serena, Leo, Emily, and Ethan. Four bestfriends who are feared through the world. What happens when the man who raised them is murdered and they have to meet his brother

Story Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6404186313719808

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I also added your story to my favorites and will read it soon! :blush:

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HI!

Thank you for starting this thread!
I’m interested in a r4r! :slight_smile:
I’ll read your story and DM you screenshots when I’m finished.
here is my story info:

Title: Dark Essence
Episode: 5
Genre: fantasy/romance
Style: Limelight
Instagram: @tldax913.episode
Description: When the darkness inside threatens to break free & destroy everything you hold dear… Will you seek comfort in the ones you love or allow your Dark Essence to take over? (Lim CC)

Link:
http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6025752143069184

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My story name is “if I can’t have you” Link is

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I finished reading your story, and I have to say I love it! You definitely got yourself a reader here.

Review for Tyre Pressure

+
Your story is incredibly original- I love the idea of a girl mechanic falling for the rich guy. I also really enjoy the Cinderella twist of them meeting at a masquerade, and the tie-in of her shoes. I am also really curious to see how Tessa came to be a mechanic, especially with her accident. Most of all, your directing is absolutely PHENOMENAL! Half the time I was reading, I kept thinking to myself: “How on Earth did she do that?!” Absolute 10/10 on that end.

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The biggest issue I could find was your punctuation and syntax. In several scenes, there are missing punctuation marks, periods where question marks should go, a bit of sentence disorganization, and there was also an instance where you had “were” instead of “we’re.” Your story-telling is great, but with a brush up, it will be even better! A great tip I’ve given to writers in the past is to read your sentences out loud to see if it makes sense before you publish your work. It sounds silly, but it really does help! I do it all the time, myself.


Overall, your story is wonderful! I can’t wait to read more. :blush:

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Thank you so much! :two_hearts:

I just finished the first three episodes of your story- I love it! I’ll definitely keep reading.

Review for The Star Necklace

+
Your plot is so original! Personally, I love stories that deal with other cultures (all of my favorite novels are by foreign and indigenous authors). I love how you integrated multiple plot points that tie together- it keeps the story moving and the reader guessing. As of episode three, I’m curious to see how Mayah’s fame ties into the rest of the story- is this how her family discovers her? What will her grandmother think!? I love it. I also have to add that your directing is GREAT! Your use of props is amazing!

Now, I usually put comments on grammar/writing in the negatives section since it’s something I’m very particular about, but your skills are very good! I’m very impressed that you speak three languages, I sure as heck wish that I could! Your story-telling ability is very strong, and you appear to have a firm grasp on the English language. There’s a couple blips with word order, but I know that comes from language-learning. You still get your point across and it doesn’t distract from the story. Keep up the good work! If your ability to tell stories is this strong in your third language, I’m sure it’s stunning in your native language!

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The one flaw I could find is one particular use of sound effects. I love sound effects in a story as they add another layer of immersion, however the gibberish “male_voice” and “female_voice” clips you use are a bit off-putting. It could just be me, but I personally find them creepy! :joy:


Overall, your story is great! I can’t wait to see what happens in future episodes! :two_hearts:

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@Purva @TLdax913 @Loverxoxo added! I will read them and have a review for you in the next 24-36 hrs! :two_hearts:

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Thank you soo much I will also read yours also

Tell me any correction to do

Tysm! I’ll take that into consideration.