Hi I just finished the Red curtain! (Sorry I only had time to read episode 1)
Plot
Right at beginning he comes out. That choice makes the story feel very rushed. I feel like we should’ve gotten time before he decided to come out to his family. Maybe at school he talks about it with Beppe and he encourages him to come out to his parents. Then it’d make more sense on why the MC would call Beppe afterwards. I feel like the way the parents responded wasn’t very realistic. Yes, people do kick out their kids but the word choice could’ve been phrased in a more serious, realistic way. The episode was extremely short.
Directing
It was okay, but as we moved scenes it felt very harsh and not smooth. Try using spot directing and transitions.
Characters
Love how supported Beppe and his father was.
Choices
There were no choices, I’m very disappointed. That could just be how you want the story to go.
Grammar
You used punctuation incorrectly for example. “Yes, Bep, I do.” That is incorrect it should be “Yes Bep, I do.”
Summary
Your ideas are out of this world, pour your heart out x.