I smile. “That sounds really good. I’d like to meet other people who know ASL. I mean, I don’t mind talking, but I can’t really hear myself anymore so it kind of feels weird.” I say, shrugging.
I can’t let him hold all his emotions in. So, I start to cry, welcoming Rae’s embrace.
Aidan: God damn it, Beth. Beth: Don’t even start, Aidan. I wipe my eyes, a little embarrassed.
“Because of me? He hasn’t talked to me yet, how could I have made him cry?” I ask. I haven’t said anything to trigger his PTSD, so why is he crying?
I was still sleeping. I was so happy. This is the best thing.
“Okay baby. I’m sorry you we’re thinking about negative things baby. You will be great love.” She smiled at him.
“We met here. It was actually my first day here. He had been here for a while already. I was on the roof drawing when he came up there. He was looking over the edge and I was scared he would fall.” I giggled here and there as I was telling the story. “We started talking and we clicked. Then one thing led o another and we ended up dating later that night.”
She feels Layla. She puts her hand on her stomach. She says quietly ”Don’t kick too much or u will wake daddy…” she smiles.
“Hey buddy are you ok? I’m sorry if I made things worse I said some things that I shouldn’t have.”
As I lay there I feel my daughter kick. I stay asleep. I here Kay talking to her. I smile big in my sleep.
She thinks He looks so cute sleeping She stays awake a little more. She lays next to him. She starts to doze off again.
“Baby girl they weren’t all bad things it’s just thinking of everything from here since when we met, to the Gabe I used to be with the hiding and lying, to the stabbing, to the getting arrested for Bryan’s crime to you being pregnant to now this. But I am scared about what’s going to happen and if I actually will be a good dad. But I will be fine.” I smiled back at her and to also show her I was actually okay. I just didn’t tell her the part about how I do kiss Jess and wish to talk to her again or that I’m scared I’m going to mess up and she’s going to divorce me. But that’s stuff she doesn’t need to know about.
I was sleeping good. I wasn’t waking up. I love my little family here.
“Okay baby.” She said. She wasn’t sure if that was all but she was letting it go. She didn’t have the energy to fight with him or sit there and tell him he is hiding something because she wasn’t really sure if he was or not this time.
She wakes up after a few minutes. She is really hungry. She sees Leo sleeping and he looks so peaceful and she doesn’t know if she should wake him up.
I could tell she believed me but knew there was more. I don’t know what to do because I love her and want to tell her but I mean my thoughts are harmless. I wouldn’t actually do anything to hurt Rose. “Babe I know your thinking I might be lying but I’m not. I agreed to our rules of no lying or hiding things and I meant it. I know if I don’t keep that promise then I will lose you and I do t want to lose you. I love you with all my heart.” I then kissed her again and got up. I held her hand and we started to walk to the cafeteria.
“Food here I come.” She giggled. “Baby let’s move on please.” She said to him with a smile. She didn’t want to dwell on it.
I felt she was awake and at this point I couldn’t sleep anymore. So I opened my eyes. “Hey beautiful. What’s up? Are you hungry?”
“Hey babe…yea I’m hungry. But I could go by myself id u want to sleep more…” she smiles.
“I’m awake love. What kind of boyfriend would I be to make you go by yourself?” He sat up and smiled at her.
“That’s true…let’s go then…” She stands up and walks with him to the cafe.
“He scares me too but hes our little fighter.” I lay down on my bed.
We walk down to the cafe. “What do y’all want baby?” He smiled as he asks her.