Reads & Reviews {Rantaro} 😽 CLOSED

Good day, everybody! Welcome to my Read & Review thread.
Here I read (wow!) your suggested stories and, if you wish, review them.

:warning: There are a lot of people waiting for their reviews!
Until I finish them, the topic is closed!
Thank you!
:warning:

Need more reads?

Just post the link to the story and note that you leave it for reading purposes only.
I’m okay with people who don’t need anybody’s opinion or are too shy to ask for.
Besides, we all know, that the amount of reads matters.
I’m looking for some stories to read anyway.

Looking for a review?

Again, post a link to the story with descriptions and (preferably) covers.
Write down everything you think I should know about.
And, of course, note that you will wait for a review from me.

What to wait from me:
My overall impressions when I first saw the story and after I read it (up to 3 chapters).
Thoughts about plot.
Thought about directing and how it works with the story.
Graphics and music following the story.
*Spelling and grammar BUT! English is not my native language. I check for mistakes only where I’m confident that there’s an error. I’ve studied long enough to notice some.

Please note! I am not a professional critisizing master in any way. If you want a review from me, it means you’re looking for a third party’s opinion. And I’ll share what I think about your story in a friendly way. Even if I didn’t like it at all. Of course, ways to improve what you already have will be written, too.

If I READ your story, I’ll like the post :heart:
If I MADE A REVIEW, I’ll reply to your post AND tag you. :tanabata_tree:

4 Likes

I’d love a review and will wait for one.

Title: Oblivious
Genre: Comedy
Episodes: 8 (on going)
Description: When socially awkward Leanna catches the eye of equally awkward Kai things can’t get more awkward, can they?

My story has no sound.

The_Quiet_One_v3_posterThumb_IVzzERr8wY%20(1)

1 Like

Hey, I would love for you to read my story.:slight_smile:
Here’s the details to my story in case you want to check it out.

Author: S_Unique

Title: The Four Horsemen

Genre: Fantasy

Style: Ink

Description: 4 Sins. 4 Angels fell. 4 Horsemen rose. A curse was casted. And the battle of good vs evil is about to begin. CC/ Choices matter

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5482099054608384

image

1 Like

I would love to!

Genre: Adventure/Fantasy/Comedy (If that makes sense)
Title: Save Me, Hero!
Author: Turtle Cat!
Plot/Summary: After powerless Hero moves from a town where everyone has superpowers, she gets kidnapped by a group of fugitives who are forcing her to join them. What will she do?
Style: Ink
This story has 4 episodes
Cover:

HERE’S THE LINK!

1 Like

I’d love to get a review (unless you don’t have time for another one :sweat_smile: )

Here are the details:
Title: Dreams and Nightmares
Author: Dreamer
Genre: Romance
Style: Ink
Description: Scarlet had a rough past and it looks like it’s not getting better after she was bought by some mysterious guy. Will she ever turn her life from a nightmare to a dream?
Episodes: 16 (more coming soon)
Instagram: dreamer.episode
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5452320906543104

My first language isn’t English, so there are probably some mistakes (although I checked about a hundred times :sweat_smile: ) And it’s my first story.
The beginning might seem a bit cliche, but there’s much more to it than what you think. There are many small things, that matter later on (maybe you’ll find them :wink: )

Thanks for offering to do reviews!

1 Like

Hiya! I’d love a review if you can :blush:
Title: Marionette
Genre: Drama
Teaser: Life as a teenager is fun right: partying and making the most of childhood? Well not for Isabelle. She didn’t get the teenage future she was hoping for.
Style: Limelight
No. of Episodes: 5 so far but more coming soon
Cover: Marionette%20Cover
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/4773114578599936

1 Like

@The_Saminator, hello! Since I had my passes I decided not to waste much time.

:sparkles:What I thought at first: You had written somewhere, that this is your first story, right? I’d say it looked like so but THEN it stopped looking like that. I went on guard because of the covers you had… It seems you worked on them yourself, and boy if I know how hard it is to make a cover. But I’ll talk about it later.
:sparkles: What I think now: I think… don’t judge a book by its cover. Your story is amazing! Even more, seeing that it’s the first you wrote! Good job. I’m absolutely reading it till the end.

:sparkles:Plot: it is the plot that is the strongest in your story. It’s funny, it’s different, it’s intriguing. The characters work together really well, I FEEL that friendship, I FEEL the awkwardness of the moment. That’s where new authors rarely pay attention but you nailed it.
One love for Abigail :heart: my fav!

:sparkles:Directing: so here is when I actually noticed it’s your first story. BUT it’s not bad at all! I must say, that you tried and you got it right most of the time.

Directing points of interest & mistakes
  • It was funny watching Leanna go weeeee~~ when she first appeared for customization. Wee~ for moving-sliding characters whose animation is static at the moment.
  • When it is time to change some clothes, you actually pause before changing it and after Leanna changed the text immediately blocks the way. To see the outfit properly I needed to choose another one and look at it while the first pause effect is working. Not so convenient.
  • Zooms! You use a lot of zooms - which is good - but sometimes they are just too slow - which is bad. You also seem not to use ANY effects between the scenes, like fading and zooming. The change of scenery is too sudden, I suggest you make a black transition between them.
  • But don’t you ever change this EXTREME ZOOM when the characters’ faces are so dope and like what?? That works PERFECT! LUV LUV!
  • Do you know the difference between “is doing” or “starts doing” commands? When the characters are talking to each other, they sometimes make those awkward pauses while somebody does something else. It works for Leanna and for funny moments, but sometimes when, like, two dudes are talking, it seems like they pause for nothing. You can make a character do something AT THE SAME TIME while another one says something. Try it out.
  • Sometimes people appear out of nowhere when the scene changes. To prevent that, set character positions right after the scene changing line. Don’t worry, if the place is fading, they will also be fading with the screen.
  • What’s with the pointing fingers animation while zooming on the face?..
  • You work with positions and height differences really well! Congrats!!

:sparkles:Graphics: here I’ll talk about the covers. Just… too much pink and violet set of colors. The background looks too empty. Then this Abigail pic that warns you about strong language… it was even circled with more pink color - badly circled - although the IDEA behind that is super cool! The size however doesn’t add up and it looks cramped. I think if it was just her face & shoulders on a more neutral background with the right sized file, that alone will do a better job. And in the end all those pixels are showing!
I’ve seen a lot of good artists who might help you fix these pics on the forums. Cause it’s really sad, it’s these pictures that doesn’t add up with your skill.

:sparkles:Language mistakes: there were two, but don’t worry, that’s okay.

  • (2nd chapter) Kai places my hand on his chest as she tries to calm me… OMG Kai is suddenly a SHE?
  • (3rd chapter) You’re room is huge! But I’m not a room…

That covers it all, I think… Nice job! You might think there’s just too many directing mistakes and notices, but really, that’s the only thing I could pick on and seriously, this is an outstanding job for an upcoming author already! If you can do THIS now, what magic will you cast later?

3 Likes

I was not expecting all this but I really really appreciate all the criticism back (how else can I approve, right?)
I am going to write it all down so I can honestly work on all that you suggested. I know the first episode is crap compared to the rest and I have thought about fixing it. I should fix it lol
Coding like many others literally scared the crap out of me when I first started but I actually spent a month watching tutorials and writing a cheat sheet before I started.
I really appreciate you taking your time breaking all of this down and I am taking it to heart snd will work on this. Thank you so very much.

1 Like

Feel free to check out my story. I would like a review please.

My story: Thriller: © Tribe of Malapinchi
Author: Jannah Jackson
Genre: Thriller/Mystery/Horror/Fantasy/Adventure
Story style: Secret Surprise :wink:
Description: Toss into a land of the sun, magic, lies and dark secrets in Asia. Can you make sense of the havoc you were tossed into and save everyone before it’s too late? CharacterCustomization
Episodes: 5/6
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5909308359180288

Cover still in Review: (One of my new covers… still havent decide haha)

My episodes are rather long… 20 mins about there just to give a heads up.

1 Like

I’d like a review
Title: Behind Closed Doors
Author: JessDeBest
Genre: Drama/Mystery
Style: INK
Story Description: College is all fun and games until you discover what’s behind closed doors. Students disappear one by one, and you’re going to get to the bottom of it.
Instagram: @iwrite.stories
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6459913677111296

2 Likes

I’d like you to read my story

Title: A Criminal’s Love
Author: episode.vel
Genre: Drama/Romance
Style: Ink
Chapters: 11
Discription
Loving Crystal Was Amazing but I Cant Keep The"JUST FRIENDS"Title
A Choice Between Her & My Daughter is a DILEMMA. She’s The Poison I Drank & I Don’t Know Where To Find The Cure

Everybody, thanks for your replies and stories~!
I’ll try to finish reading and making reviews for them as soon as possible, probably one review per day.
Due to a lot of requests I’d like to close the topic for a while :sweat_smile: :smiley_cat:

2 Likes

Take your time

1 Like

I’m sorry, I didn’t catch… You’d love to what? For me to read the story? Or making a review on it?

1 Like

I would love to get a review. Sorry if that was missed.:sweat_smile:

1 Like

Alright, hello again, @Turtle_Cat :smiley_cat: I’m ready to share what I think.

:sparkles: Overall… good. Real good, but not perfect due to my own preferences. I rarely read stories about superheroes so I can’t say much but I feel the vibe of old marvel cartoons and early x-men if you get what I mean haha. Like, a team of people working together each with their own power… Nice!
But why is her name “HERO”? That kinda bothered me the whole way…

:sparkles: The plot was okay. Again, it’s me who cannot judge this genre properly. However, what I felt was that the plot lacks unpredictable things. I guessed right away that Axel was her brother. I knew going back home wouldn’t be that simple. Also, about shoving the swapping girl into their hideout, it would be way cooler if readers didn’t know beforehand that there was a problem behind that. More secrets! More riddles! Your story needs that.

:sparkles: Directing is nice! You work with fading effects, overlays, zooms well! The nighttime in the first chapter felt like I was in some kind of an RPG sleeping at the inn. I also liked how you did the wardrobe choices showing every outfit beforehand THEN allowing to choose. The opening picture zooms are very cool! How you move the screen around from face to face then to the title… :heart:

There was an issue when the family first moves in their new house. You zoomed in then left it that way and I was waiting for a minute there until dad finally walks past the scene while looking at his big belly cause it’s still zoomed…

Some of the CCs didn’t show up but that’s my bad I guess :c

:sparkles: It is nice to hear some music going on in your story, but leaving some scenes silent is an okay thing too. Your first chapters were filled with tracks so much! - it think there was no silent scenes at all at first - it becomes somewhat annoying.
:sparkles: Also a bit about character design. Give them some unique clothes! MORE unique. They are special, they have super abilities, then why are they dressed the same style? (except for the telepathic guy, there’s something special about his costume I remember) I mean, they should have their favourite colors and fashion choices, right?

:sparkles: There were LOTS of teeny tiny mistakes here and there, I even lost track of them, so I suggest you just check the script again. Wrong letters, doubled letters (bbitches!!), missing ’ and putting ’ where it shouldn’t be…

Keep up the good work! Hope you’ll make this story into a masterpiece someday! :kissing_cat:

1 Like

Hello, @RainbowCat, and here comes your review! :smiley_cat:

:sparkles: Speechless. Just speechless. Your story is awesome in many terms. You warned me right - it did seem cliche at first, but it quickly escalated into something else. I’m really happy it didn’t turn into those “I’m sad and alone but now I’m powerful and here’s my man we’ll kick your butt” type.

:sparkles: The plotline is amazing. The story digs deep and it’s usually hard to keep those dark notes but you manage that great. Yes, there are many traumatizing events happening and I’m glad you pay proper attention to show all the difficulties of this kind of life without sugarcoating anything.

:sparkles: I didn’t see any language or directing errors out there. No wonder, it’s episode 16 out already and even if there were any mistakes and flaws, you’ve corrected and polished everything long before I got to the story. You don’t seem to use any zooms and other effects that much but your story doesn’t need them.

:sparkles: It’s kinda cool you have special outfits for the gang! Shows it works like a big badass family. Lazy (maybe) but cool.

Don’t know what else there is to say. Awesome work, really! I hope your story gets all these reads it deserves, it’s a gem. :gem:

1 Like

Omg thank you sooooo much :sob: I’m so happy you liked it and really understood the meaning of it! Thank you for taking the time to read and reviewing it! I put so much effort in this story and I’m so glad someone likes it and doesn’t see it as the cliche story!

1 Like

Hello! I’m sorry but it seems something’s wrong with your link. Did you paste the correct one?
And is your story error free? I mean looping kind of errors which doesn’t show on script but makes it impossible to read irl.

Episode throws me in some kind of advanced reading mode, where I can move between scenes and change my flags like I am the editor myself, watching how the story works in the app. And although I tapped through the text like I would do reading a story, it stops after a certain scene and I can’t do anything after that.



This is how it looks like for me when I tap on the link to read it.

Flagged the post and wrote a bug report for Episode team to notice just in case it might be a serious problem.