Reviewing an Unpublished Story


#1

I’ve recently started a new story that I’m SUPER excited about writing, but I’m only on the first 12 or so minutes of the first chapter so far :lying_face: I was wondering if anyone would be willing and interested in checking what I have so far and giving me feedback on whether it’s good or what I could improve on :slight_smile:
Here’s the link if you’re interested:

And the temporary cover:

EDIT: Please mind the cover, my backgrounds and overlays haven’t been approved yet :poop:
Also, I’ve been debating whether or not to make it very Limited CC or no CC at all, so any input on that would be great too :raised_hands:


#2

what’s it about?


#3

I haven’t changed the summary in a while lol sorry
It’s basically about four friends, two of which are humans and two that are supernatural creatures, and basically goes through their struggles in the mysterious town that they’re in and the surrounding supernatural territories until the eventual “downfall” of two of the characters.


#4

I’ll be changing from each of the character’s perspective, but for now I started with only two of the four characters since I really want to flesh all of them and their families out in the first 3 or 4 episodes.


#5

Sounds good! I’ll look at it as soon as I have some free time. I’ll contact you then :slight_smile:


#6

That sounds great, thank you so much! :smile:


#7

Hey, I checked out your story. I think it’s great so far. The only thing I would watch for, is to much narration back to back. Also maybe cut some time on your author note.


#8

That’s actually what I’ve been thinking about so far, haha
I knew I made the intro pretty dialogue heavy and I’ve been trying to figure out how to deal with it so far. Thanks for the feedback! :sparkling_heart:


#9

You’re welcome, I loved the beginning lol. Maybe take some of the middle out. I would keep the statement about the characters opinions etc…


#10

Yeah I’m DEFINITELY gonna keep that because I know there are some people who can take things the wrong way lol
And thanks for the advice again!


#11

Is anyone else willing to review my story? :stuck_out_tongue:


#12

Omg I’ve just read the sneak peek holy crap I love your sense of humour! Your characters are great and soooo interesting (I especially like Jupiter, she’s badass lol)


#13

Your directing is great! Especially for an unpublished story! I don’t think this is your first time writing, your coding skills are too elite :joy:


#14

If you’d ever like to check out my story, Trapped (published with 8 chapters and still ongoing)

Then here’s the link!

I need feedback too haha


#15

Awww you’re making me blush, stop it :sparkling_heart:
And I’m glad to see that my jokes weren’t just funny to me lol :joy:
Thanks for the feedback, and I’d love to read your story! It’s the least I could do :grin:


#16

Thank you so much! I’ll be sure to follow up on your story often! Remember to @ me when u add something new!


#17

Sorry, I was busy with class lol
For sure! :grin: :raised_hands:


#18

I hope u enjoy my story if u decide to check it out :wink:


#19

Bump :poop: