Reviewing your stories

Will happily review any story. Here’s my format:

(What I liked paragraph)
(What needs improvement)
(how to improve)
(rating out of 10)
(If you want anything else, just tell me)
due to personal reasons I can only do three reviews per day


Hi! I’m Rebecca and I was wondering if you would provide feedback on my story. I’ve only written the first episode but I am unsure if I should even continue writing it. Please let me know what you think.

1 Like

Hey Can u review my story? Its my first one.
Its called "Black Hearts, Golden Desires
05a684466238b104eb35ac757fdd4e636dc9791b_2_362x499 "

I would love a review

My story The Star Necklace

Description: you are the most rich girl in your country in addition you’re famous but what happens when the Star Necklace uncovers your true identity

I will get back to you as soon as possible.

sure! you’re 1st in my queue. will get back asap

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Hey ! Would you mind reviewing my story ?? I’m in the same position as @rebecca8890

No problem.

name of story plz?

I’m going to send the link :

Would love a review on my story !


Genre: Romance & Comedy

Description: Married at first sight, uh? Seemed like a good idea until Maya found out that the perfect match she was supposed to be with turned out to be everything but what she dreamed of.

Chapters: 3 (on going)

No CC, Limelight, love interest

Please :hugs:

Love customisation
The conversations feel a bit stilted. To keep them fresh add in different animations.
The conversation between her and April are great and realistic.

Angry hangup doesn’t go with her mood

good choices
great directing

I think you should add full stops in narrating.

conversations between alex and Emily are good

word choice ‘adjourned’ is a bit odd and doesn’t fit the moment

I understand after a loop you need a pause, so try using less looped talking to keep the conversation going.
more animations

the flirting moves a bit too quickly. brad just left. have some decency alex!


I love the plot and I think you have a really good idea, just focus a bit more on really polishing the animations!

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good plot idea, original and fresh
controversial topics are a great compeller
great English for not being a native speaker
original backgrounds and great overlays
great narration
realistic characters
take out some of the transitions maybe, as they have a slightly chaotic feel
great directing
love the diversity
text effects are used oddly at times
the characters are realistic and the antagonist has views to disagree with which is very effective

cultural representations are accurate

these are genuine problems people face, it is a very compelling plot

when jehad is giving birth to bahieyeh it seems very unrealistic, her pain is not heartfelt. try text effects and zooms
unnecessary flashbacks after bahieyeh birth

I really like your ideas! 9/10

1 Like

the cover I really like. simple and compelling
I don’t think that the government would pay for any of this as it doesn’t have enough money.
the characters are realistic
the awkward pauses actually got a laugh out of me!
I thought the survey was online?
also I think you should let us answer some of those questions and use them later, e.g
DREAMBOY (talk_neutral)
So, I heard you’re looking for a [trait] guy?
the friends are great
I actually feel sorry for max! (good thing)
actually love max
please continue!

1 Like

My story: © Tribe of Malapinchi
Author: Jannah Jackson
Genre: Thriller/Mystery/Horror/Fantasy/Adventure
Description: Toss into a land of the sun, magic, lies and dark secrets in Asia. Can you survive, solve the havoc and save everyone before it’s too late? CharacterCustomization
Episodes: 6/7


Ahah thank you ! Yeah you fill out of a form but then you go and see someone to make sure everything is okay then they call you back, and I will use this later on the story don’t worry !
Thank you I am glad you liked it :heart:

Thanks so much

Thank you so much for your help, I will edit and improve it right now!

hiya sorry! I will definitely check this one out and review it but I may have to push it a bit later. you should get it back today? sorry to disappoint.

1 Like