Romance Help Please

So I have hard time trying to introduce romane in my story

  1. Because its a vampire vampire hunter love
  2. They can’t stay together long because they break up
  3. She was assigned to kill him
  4. I try to avoid cliches
  5. When is it to early to bring in romance?
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As far as introducing the characters, I think you’ll be fine introducing the love interest in chapter one. However, you shouldn’t have them be together romantically that early on, since it’s a cliché “love at first sight” situation. I feel that it is best to introduce the love interest within the first chapter so the readers can get to know him and all the drama in your story starts to happen. Maybe your vampire hunter could find him and think “It was at this point I knew I had to kill him”. A unique turn on this you could do instead of instant love because they’re both attractive (the most annoying cliché to me IMO) is have them go from enemies to lovers. The vampire hunter chases him down but the vampire always gets away. He taunts and teases her, saying she’ll never catch him. Then maybe one time she catches him, but is distracted by how attractive he is up close and in person. She finally starts to see him romantically, as does he. Their relationship crashes and burns, being they are two totally different people. They fight all the time. This would not be cliché since I rarely see fast breakups between a love interest and main character. This is just a suggestion tho :woman_shrugging:

Can I send you a preview of my script?


Episode 1
@transition fade out in 3
music music_latinguitarpop
@cut to zone 2
@ENZO stands screen left AND ENZO faces right
@pause for 2
@ENZO walks to screen right AND ENZO is walk_sad
@pause for a beat
@ENZO walks to screen left AND ENZO is walk_sad
@ENZO faces right AND ENZO is deepbreath
@ROSE enters from right to screen right
@ROSE is tinker_loop_rear
ENZO (talk_angry_accuse)
Where the hell have you been? I was worried sick about you!
ROSE (talk_neutral_deny)
Calm down. I just walked through the door and you didn’t even give me time to organize my thoughts
ENZO (talk_happy_hand_raised)
Oh organize your thoughts take all the time in the fucking world
ROSE (talk_reassure)
Oh good at least we’re on the same page
ENZO (talk_angry_arms_crossed)
Rose! I’m done playing your games just tell me where you were
ROSE (talk_angry_stubborn)
Or what? You’ll tell our parents? You can’t their dead!
ENZO (talk_awkward)
Are you drunk again?
ROSE (talk_exhausted)
Look Enzo, I’m fine I’m not hurt just tired so can we continue this in the morning
ENZO (talk_sad)
Yeah I just worry about you sometimes
@ROSE exits left AND ROSE is walk_exhausted
@ENZO is deepbreath
@transition iris out in 3
@ELI stands screen right AND ELI faces left AND ELI is text_phone_neutral_loop
readerMessage Meanwhile…
@pause for a beat
@JAX enters from left to screen left AND JAX is run_athletic
@JAX is cough
@ELI is arms_crossed
JAX (talk_afraid)
I have some bad news and some bad news
&ELI is arms_crossed_angry
JAX (talk_sheepish)
So the first thing is that Carter escaped from prison
JAX (talk_arms_crossed_loop)
And then…
The words Jax said went through one ear and out the other
The only thing I could focus on was | animation:flash:3 , bold , color:blue , italic | Carter
My younger brother, the guy who made my life a living hell
He had broken out
&JAX is shocked
ELI (talk_angry)
Stop fucking talking Jax!
&JAX is nod_loop
ELI (talk_angry_accuse)
Go get Zoey and tell her to get her ass in here
@JAX exits left AND JAX is run_athletic
@pause for a beat
@ZOEY enters from left to screen center
ELI (talk_doubtful)
Did you know about this?
ZOEY (talk_neutral_deny)
Know about what? What are you talking about?
ELI (talk_angry_arms_crossed)
Zoey you know damn well what I’m talking about
&ELI is slap_face_receive
ZOEY (slap_face)
Calm down!

So Rose is the MC and Eli is LI
I have it planned as to where the next morning she gets a call saying a vampire killed 6 people and injured four more she is then furious because her parents were killed by vampires when she was younger

Moved to Share Feedback since this is about a story plot. Make sure to check out our Forum Tutorial for more info about where to correctly create topics, and feel to PM me if there are any questions. :wink:

Besides some minor grammar mistakes, I think your plot and dialogue is good! It’s really intriguing and I would read the story. I like your idea to have Rose get the news a vampire killed and injured someone. Maybe then at the end she could say something like “I knew at this point I was going to get revenge, and kill the vampire that did that.” Overall I will check out your story when it’s published. I usually do not like vampire stories, but yours is not cliché at all and seems to have interesting characters.


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