Roni Reviews | Very Detailed and Honest First Episode Reviews {CLOSED DO NOT ASK FOR A REVIEW}


#1

Hey everyone it’s Roni! I have recently created a thread for covers, intros and outros so if you would like one go and check it out! As you can see from the title i will be reviewing your stories. I will only be reviewing the first episode because if readers don’t enjoy the first episode they will most likely stop reading your story. I am a very honest reviewer so if your feelings get hurt easily you may want to find someone else. I will be giving out brutal constructive criticism in order to help you intice readers into continuing your story.

"You don’t get a second chance to make a first impression."-Will Rogers.

Please do not ask for a review if you’ve already asked on another thread and/or platform.

  • I do not appreciate people wasting my time.
  • And honestly if you need 5+ people to review your story it just tells me you’re not very confident with what you’ve written.
  • Also please don’t just read your review and ignore it, i have given up my free time to read and review your story so the least you can do is thank me.

Please fill out the form below for a review of your first episode:

Review Form

Story Title:
Author Name:
Story Genre:
Story Description:
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes/No

PLEASE READ.
Please please please don’t ignore your review! I cannot stress enough over how much effort i put into them! If people continue to ignore my effort i will stop reviewing stories, thank you.

This is what one of my reviews looks like :sparkles::

Review Example:

Author/s- @PrettyEri
Title- Kotton Kandie.

Plot:
I thought the storyline was fragmented and forced at times due to the amount of information you thought you needed to clarify to the reader. No twisty plots nor rich characterization and no deep dive into a certain kind of behavioral psychology. This was more of an analysis of obsession, and morality on the characters’ motivations and relationships. You didn’t use flashbacks nor did you use forshadowing, these techniques can be very important because they give insight into a character’s current motivation and emotional state. Flashbacks show an event that happened years before the story begins, which is vitally important for the reader to know in order to fully understand the tension or mysterious circumstances of the current story.
Average plot score: 2.4 (Equilvalent to a high C)

Episode Length:
Personally i like episodes to at least hit the 15 minute mark, your first episode took me around 5-8 minutes to read. Which isn’t terrible if the content included makes up for the length, however you didn’t include any valuable content that i took an interest in. Most of the scenes were unnecessary and/or quite tedious. I would’ve liked to see a better starting point, perhaps showing what Kandie has faced in her past that had such an impact on her she felt the need to attend therapy sessions. Although you made the main focus point of the story quite clear i do feel like you forced the cliffhanger at the end of the episode to get it over and done with.
Average episode length score: 2.2 (Equilvalent to a low C)

Grammar and sentence structure:
There wasn’t many mistakes regarding grammar and the mistakes included weren’t at all noticeable. Your overall spelling was pretty good despite some minor errors in the midst of sentences. You doubled your punctuation alot in order to make points (??) instead it may be better to use (?!) this way your grammar looks more professional and clear. Other than those errors and a few random speech occurances, your grammar didn’t cause me any problems. In time and with practice your grammatical skills will provide readers a valid reason to read your story.
Average grammatical score: 3.0 (Equilvalent to a low B)

Characters
Your protagonist, Kandie, was quite a confusing character judging on the way she handled certain situations. The reasonings behind her impulsive descisions weren’t always clear and explained with this in mind readers may not consider her a likeable character. For example the scene in the school when she ‘fought’ a teacher wasn’t necessary as it only proved that Kandie’s character isn’t very intelligent, this scene also turned her job into an unrealistic situation. Your characters are people. Regardless of what they’re doing in your story, they’re whole, real people. They have their own experiences, their own motivations, their own wants and dreams. Don’t write a woman “like she’s human” because she is human.
Average character score: 2.2 (Equilvalent to a high C)

Directing:
The visual elements of your story weren’t exactly ‘jawdropping’ as i didn’t notice any advanced experimentations other than general directing skills. There was nothing wrong with your directing, in fact i noticed no errors with it apart from your opening scene where you as an author introduced the protagonist rather than allowing her character to unfold gradually to the readers. You used zooming a few times however i noticed many more scenes in where the use of zooming would’ve improved the general aesthetic of the scene. The spot directing could’ve been better as you could’ve included more of a variety of background characters to properly set the scene and highlight the main focus points.
Average directing score: 3.0 (Equilvalent to a low B)

P.S. Thank you so much for patiently waiting for this review, i hope it was worth it!
I look forward to seeing how your story will progress. - Roni x

Thankyou! If you have any questions don’t hesitate to ask :blush:.


#2

Thank you for this!! :heart:

Story Title: Soccer Moms: Blast to the Future
Author Name: Winter05 with Episode Royalty
Customization?: Limited
Style: INK
Genre: Drama
Episodes: 6 [COMPLETE]
Story Description: All it takes is one shot to change your whole life. Win or lose, nothing will ever be the same.
Instagram Names: @winter05.episode with @penroyalty
Story Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6395210318086144

I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes

~ Winter :snowflake:


#3

Great thread but this shouldn’t be in the art resources section :slight_smile:


#4

Hey, thanks for doing this!

Story Title: I’m So Confused
Author Name: Savanna W.
Story Genre: Drama
Story Description: She’s always been confused about boys, friends, drama and well…life. What happens when she loses her memory and is more confused than ever?
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Mostly. I really should perfect this episode, so brutal honesty is needed.

Just to warn you, there is a lot of swearing in the episode from the beginning, so if you’re offended by that don’t read it. There’s already things in the episode that I know I need to change, such as the scene at the start. All constructive criticism will be taken and if you can, tell me what I need to change. Another warning, it does seem a lil’ cliche in this episode, but I promise it’s not in the other episodes. If you have any tips to fix this, can you please tell me? Thanks again :blush:

Btw, are you DMing us with the review and what exactly are you reviewing the most?


#5

That was an unitentional mistake. Thanks for pointing it out!


#6

I will post the review on here when i’m finished. I will review the whole first episode in alot of detail so i’ll be focusing on the main aspects of the story, and giving you constructive criticism. :heartpulse:


#7

Okay, thank you! Would it be okay to DM me mine, if you do it? If not that’s fine, but I think I might prefer it :slightly_smiling_face: :two_hearts:


#8

Of course! I’ll message you as soon as i’ve finished. :heartpulse:


#9

Thanks again! :two_hearts:


#10

Hi. Here’s our newest story, a Fantastical contest entry. :wink:

Story Title: Fantastical: Falling From Grace
Author(s): Episode Royalty (@Queen_Faith & @BLUE2109)
Genre: Fantasy
Style: Limelight
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes

Can we submit more than one review of a story from the same authors (different story, same authors)? :thinking:

~ :snowflake:


#11

That’s fine :blush:


#12

Hello. Here’s another one of our stories, which we’re trying to get more reads on. Thank you! :slight_smile:

Story Title: Surviving Love
Author(s): Episode Royalty (@WinterMoon05 & @Loversdelight)
Genre: Drama
Style: INK
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes

~ Winter :snowflake:


#13

Hey. Thank you for this! Here’s another one of our stories, again which we’re trying to get more reads on. :smile:

Story Title: Thorns
Author(s): Episode Royalty (@WinterMoon05 & @Liz_jc)
Genre: Drama
Style: INK
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes

~ Winter :snowflake:


#14

Hi, I’d love a review!

Story Title: Reformed
Author Name: Cordelia M
Story Genre: Romance (would appreciate advice on this actually… am considering moving it to mystery)
Story Description: Reformed bad girl falls for bad boy who reminds her of her past - cliché, right? But what if Violet isn’t truly reformed? What if she’s secretly still badder than Carter ever was?
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/4696324662099968
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes (please be as brutally honest as possible/necessary!!)

Thank you so much!
Xx


#15

Story Title: Lost Boy Lost Girl
Author Name: MrBitPlayer
Story Genre: Drama
Story Description: A lonely girl next door and troubled boy come closer together as challenges bring out the worse and best in them. [CC] [+perspectives+]
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes, I don’t mind one bit. First impressions are key important.

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6253275339161600


#16

Hello @roniepisode !!! This is my first story on Episode! Hope you will like it :slight_smile:

Story title : Sandy and her Quadruplets
Author : RJ14
Genre : Comedy
Description : How can she survive with noisy and disobedient quadruplets? Will she finally find the father of her sons ? Here’s the crazy life of Sandy and her quadruplets!
I will be extremely honest is that ok? : Yes, because no one is perfect ! ( Just want to say sorry for my grammar. I’m correcting the mistakes :confused: )

Link : http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5337323130716160


#17

Hey, thank you so much for creating this thread!
Title: Love Has No Color
Author: Brenda Adams
Genre: Drama
Style: Limelight
Chapters: 4
Description: Naturelle is finally able to attend public school for her senior year. She ends up meeting a charming boy that has dark family secrets What happens when those secrets get revealed?
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5700092797779968
image
Honesty is okay.


#18

Hi, @roniepisode!

Thank you very much for creating this thread, this is very kind of you! Constructive criticism is exactly what I am looking for!

If you are interested in reading a story with several mini-games and where CHOICES REALLY MATTER then, please, give my story a try. I promise, the story will keep you hooked :blush: Episode advocates recommended! (which has made me insanely happy. Go check their account for awesome recommendations if you haven’t yet!)

My story details:

Name of story: H & V: Fate
Author: Alex Af
Genre: Thriller
Episodes: 4 (completed)
Summary of story: Young ambitious journalist hunting down a powerful tycoon who has made a fortune based on lies. But who really is a villain here? Choices matter.
Link to story: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6548486212681728
Instagram: @episode.alex.af


#19

Fantastical: Worlds Collide
Story Title: Fantastical: Worlds Collide
Story Genre: Fantasy
Story Description: Judith is at an all time low life gets better but how?
I will be extremely honest is that ok?: Yes


#20

This is so nice of you! Here’s my story info:
Title: Over Before You Know It
Author: Lizard
Genre: Drama
Description: You and your best friend make a suicide pact to go to the Grand Canyon and end it all together. Will you both really do it? Or will it be over before you know it?

It’s okay if you’re honest.

My instagram: @lizard.episode
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6584190301765632