Someone Help Me Continue My Story!

It’s called Swimming With Lust
I had help, but they won’t respond.
I’m on Episode 3.
Here’s the link:

The story needs some work

You need background characters
When she got to school they automatically went to lunch.
I felt some music was needed.
The plot didn’t get me into it

Where did you get that cafeteria background?

2 Likes

Hi so I read your story ^^

I hope this can help:

- Episode 1:

  • Use @transition fade in/out in color in time
    *Be careful when your characters are speaking, use @CHARACTER faces right/left so they look to the right person.
  • More background characters.
  • Spot directing in the party scene.
  • Size of your character, some could be taller or smaller.
  • overlay “crowd” in your party scene is weird, don’t put that, use backgrounds characters.
  • overlay “body” after the murderer is too small…
  • you can ask an artist to make you splashes (intro, outro, mature themes…)

- Episode 2:

  • overlay “blanket” is really weird on that scene, I have one if you want?
  • Place your overlays correctly in your scene with the reporter.

In general:

  • What is the plot?
  • Who are they?
  • Where are we? Period? City?

You need to work on that because I didn’t get the point of your story…

4 Likes

Thanks! And the blanket overlay would be awesome!

1 Like

So do you know the insta of who made that cafeteria bg?

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1 Like