Story Reviews! (Honest Feedback)

requests
mustread
community

#1

Hi! I’m Abbie, I’m training to be a copy editor and proof reader and I’d love to read your stories! I’ll read however many chapters you’d like me to read (max of 8) and I’ll give you constructive criticism and feedback on your story. I will talk to you about your cover art, choices, storyline and characters.
Just tell me the name of your story and, if it’s not published, send me a link. My top five review requests I will post recommendations to! Please keep in mind I have a waiting list and so I won’t be able to get back to you right away. My waiting list right now is:

@The_Saminator
@RainbowCat
@JannahJackson
@mystique_writer
@Fatima.s
@Kalani-Santino
@Turtle_Cat
@MayLaugh
@MissLibra
@Owlquest
@S_Unique


#2

Title; Flight of Passion
Author ; Jadlyss
Chapters ; 1-4 are out!
Genre ; Romance
Description ; In honor of her father, Ashlynn applies to the high school of their dreams! Once she reaches the steps into Thompson Aviation, she faces an obscurity…It’s an all boys high school
Covers;
SMALL

Ch1-3
Ch1-3.jpg1200x1656 1.47 MB

LARGE

oie_eoNb82gTbgPL
oie_eoNb82gTbgPL.png965x642 585 KB

episodeinteractive.com

The Best Stories Are Worth Sharing: Flight of Passion


#3

Thank you!


#4

I’ll get back to you ASAP


#5

Okay! I hope you enjoy it ;D


#6

Title: Oblivious
Author The Saminator
Chapters: 1-4
Genre: romance-comedy
Description: When socially awkward Leanna gets noticed by equally awkward Kai things can’t get more awkward, can they?
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6516385127464960
Small cover:
IMG_20181010_095210_605


#7

Can you please review mine?
It’s Dreams and Nightmares by Dreamer
There are 15 episodes published until now, please read as many as you want/as many as you can :slight_smile: I could really use someit feedback on more than justa the first three episodes.


#8

Hope you wouldn’t mind checking out my story as well… although Thriller may be over…Halloween is still around the corner haha :smiley:

My story: Thriller: Tribe of Malapinchi
Author: Jannah Jackson
Genre: Thriller
Story style: All the 4 episode styles: LIMELIGHT, INK, Classic & Spotlight (for all 3 styles)
Description: Toss into a land of the sun, magic, lies and dark secrets. Can you make sense of the havoc you were tossed into and save everyone before it’s too late? CharacterCustomization
Episodes: 5/6
Instagram: @jannahjackson
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5909308359180288

Tribe%20of%20Malapinchi%20Cover%202


#9

Title: Teacher or Queen?
Author: Mystique
Genre: drama
Style: Limelight
Chapters (published): 10
Description: After years of searching she had finally found them. Can she get close to them?
Her destiny is about to change forever. What will she choose - who will she become?
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5874052041146368


#10

@episode_girl23
Hey, hope you check my story if you don’t mind❤️!

Title: to the stars and further
Author: fatima
Genre: romance
Story description:Living a normal life will no longer be an option. You are a star and a star will find you.
Link of story: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/4520226729099264
Instagram: @fatima.episode1
image


#11

Would love for you to review mine :blush: i have 5 episodes published thank you

I will be your Romeo by Kalani Santino.


#12

I would love to!

Genre: Adventure/Fantasy/Comedy (If that makes sense)
Title: Save Me, Hero!
Author: Turtle Cat!
Plot/Summary: After powerless Hero moves from a town where everyone has superpowers, she gets kidnapped by a group of fugitives who are forcing her to join them. What will she do?
Style: Ink
I published this a few days ago, so it only has 3 episodes
Cover:

HERE’S THE LINK!


#13

Hey girl… this is my story <3

My Story:
Author: May Laugh
Title: Trouble Twins
Instagram: maylaugh_episode
Genre: Romance (and a little comedy, too.)
Style: Ink
Description:
Danger. Passion. Love.
Always standing up for each other, going through thick and thin. That is what these twins are all about. But can they really master every chaos together?

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5334870588784640

NEUES%20COVER
NEUES COVER.png900x638 333 KB


#14

For the cover art, I really like both of them. But I feel like the two styles of the large one and the small one don’t really go together. I think it would be best to pick one style and have them both done in similar styles. But you can do whatever you like with your cover art, so you choose. Now, on with the story!

NEGATIVES -
It might be a good idea to jump into things more at the beginning, it’s a little slow.

  • This is just me being picky here, but when you’re doing “This story uses sound” and “choices matter”, is it possible to make the writing fade in and out faster?
  • In the eyesight test, perhaps you could be more specific about two things: that you shouldn’t type spaces between the letters, and instead of saying “what letters am I pointing to on this line”, just put “what letters are on this line” so that the reader knows they don’t have to just type the first letter.
  • I don’t know how far apart in age Ashlynn and Jasper are, or if Ashlynn is super-short, but I feel like Ashlynn and Jasper should be closer in height. If Ashlynn is just short or they’re far apart in age, please correct me.
  • I like how you get to do your hair and makeup for the exam, but afterwards they reset to the original, and not how you customised it at the very start. Why don’t you put something like “I asked you to do lipstick and hair for the exam. I’m now going to ask you to choose the lip color and hairstyle you had before… or you can even pick a new one if you want!” and then put the template for choosing hairstyle and lip color.
  • I would like if you could chose your outfit for the date

POSITIVES -

  • Firstly, I really liked all the fading effects. It’s these little things that make the stories nicer to read!
  • Major points for all the details. Most writers just get on with the plot but you added in tiny details to make it more interesting for the reader.
  • I liked the little intro to the character, and the overlay of the phone hitting Wilson xD . <3 the effect when Rick is drunk and all the lines are distorted! That’s really clever. In fact, could you tell me how to do that? Also, when Wilson hugs Ashlynn in the first episode, how do you do that? Are the arms an overlay?
  • It’s pretty awesome how you did the exam with the things Ashlynn had to remember.
  • I LOVE the artwork in the first episode, who did that for you?
  • I really like how you took care to get a phone background and text bubbles created.
  • Really good music and sounds

MISTAKES -

  • When Rick says “fifteen minutes past by” in the first episode it’s actually “passed”.
  • When Ashlynn says “mechanics” she doesn’t do an animation

OVERALL -
This was a really good and original story. You’re a skilled writer!


#15

I’ve got quite a lot of requests already, so I’m doing my stories in this order - one every day (not including halloween)

@The_Saminator (tomorrow)
@RainbowCat (Sunday 28)
@JannahJackson (Monday 29)
@mystique_writer (Tuesday 30)
@Fatima.s (Thursday 1)
@Kalani-Santino (Friday 2)
@Turtle_Cat (Saturday 3)
@MayLaugh (Sunday 4)


#16

I would love honest feedback My story: Trust the Love
Author: Misslibra
Title: Trust the Love
Instagram: misslibra3582
Genre: Romance (and a little comedy, too.)
Style: Ink
Description:
Trusting in love is easier said than done.
Stubborn Cassie and serious Jackson find themself is the battle of finding true love
Go along with this intense and impactful love story.
Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/6188648946335744

https://discourse-cdn-sjc1.com/business4/uploads/episodeinteractive/original/3X/0/2/023c82fbb1e42947b982e6b919f5fbc5178c4343.jpeg


#17

Thank you so much for your honesty, I’ll keep all your tips in mind!
And as for the hug— I just copy and pasted limbs then made them into overlays :slight_smile:
For the drunk animation I just blurred the image and set it’s overlay opacity to .5 :joy:


#18

I would love an honest review :grin: keep in mind I’m still learning :joy: I’ve posted 7 chapters :grin:

Hope you like it!


#19

Hey, I would love for you to check out my story and give me some feedback.:slight_smile:
Here’s the details to my story in case you want to check it out.

Author: S_Unique

Title: The Four Horsemen

Genre: Fantasy

Style: Ink

Description: 4 Sins. 4 Angels fell. 4 Horsemen rose. A curse was casted. And the battle of good vs evil is about to begin. CC/ Choices matter

Link: http://episodeinteractive.com/s/5482099054608384


I would love for you to read 8 please.:slight_smile:


#20

Review on:
OBLIVIOUS by The Saminator

Cover Art and Splashes -

  • nice cover, I would normally say it was basic but it really fits with the genre and theme, and the facial expressions are just… xD

Effects -

  • nice zooming effects

Characters -

  • I like how much alike Leanna and Kai are
  • Well-thought-out personalities
  • The character Abigail is hilarious. Love her xD
  • Contrasting characters

X - When Leanna first explains that she’s getting adopted, she doesn’t speak as though it’s a big deal, when she’s incredibly shy and awkward. Maybe there could be a kind of “I’M FREAKING OUT” speech?

Plot -

  • charming and hilarious plot that all fits perfectly together

Choices -

  • I like the amount of choices
  • A good many options for the dressing games

Spelling and Grammar - All good

Overall I could barely find mistakes with this story. It fits perfectly with the genre and I will definitely be recommending it in one of my posts!