Sufferjng from Over-protectiveness!


#1

Okay so I really wanted to adress this issue and also I would like to know what other people think of the same.

I kind of ran away from my house and I live with my older brother who is now 19 years old. And he is really over protective. Like everything I do he needs an answer for it. It is hard to explain why I find it really annoying coz you might say they just care that much but sometimes people need to lay back a little. :sweat_smile::sweat_smile:

I don’t need help. I can take care of myself and if I find that I can’t then I will ask you to help me myself won’t l? Having mostly all guy friends I observe that most of them feel like it’s their duty to protect us when it really isn’t.

It’s one thing to care about someone and worry about them but a whole another thing to annoy them by dwelling over pointless things.

What are your thoughts on the topic?


#2

I think that you are lucky to have a brother who is always there to protect you… My brother would left me under a buss and wouldn’t even care LMAO


#3

LMAO it’s not even funny when he gets over protective. You really don’t know how irritating and annoying it gets. It’s like you have no freedom.


#4

I understand that maybe just talk to him about it and discuss it with him.


#5

Yeah like he would listen. He says and I quote “You are small and young. You don’t know what is best for you. I do. And so I am going to do what I can to protect you.” Like dude when I need you I will ask you myself. You don’t need to hover over me all day.


#6

I get you. Actually my whole family is. When I was young, I wasn’t allowed to go to a park. I can only go if I attend a mass and stroll afterwards. If I’m not home till 5:30 pm to 6 pm my phone got a lot of calls. I’m not even allowed to go with my friends. All I do was school, home , school , home. It sucks you know. I don’t even understand. I have a younger sister and an old brother. But they have more freedom than I do when I was in high school my father got angry when my brother teaches me how to bike. He said I’m a girl and girls do not use bikes. But u know what? They bought my little sister a bike. Like wtf? Now, I can’t find a job (I’m a fresh grad though) I have a lot of opportunities outside my hometown even received a call from a big company. But I turned it down although I want to because my mom gets sad if I’m away from home. I tried to talk to her about that but she’s using reverse psychology on me. And because I’m a soft-hearted daughter I can’t say no to her.:sob:


#7

Finally someone who understands me!


#8

It’s tiring. But I never lied to them. I never secretly go to far away places without their permission.


#9

I actually did. I mean when I lived with my step mom and dad she jsut won’t let me go anywhere and my dad always agreed with want she said. I used to sneak off just to piss her further. Eventually I got tired and ran away when it got too much. Now I live with my older brother.


#10

I can’t relate to this topic that well as my family’s mostly chill and my brother isn’t over protective at all. However, my parents are very loving and don’t want to see me get hurt. They know I can handle myself but if something or someone was causing me serious distress, I can let them know.

One thing my parents don’t want me to do: walk out at night.

I did it once and my mom got mad, but I kinda just brushed off her concerns and told her not to worry. However, that was kinda rude of me as she was just worried : /

Now that I’m a bit older, taking walks at night is something that I’ve done a few times, although these days, I’m too lazy to go outside even.

I really should though.

I can relate to running away, I’ve done that before and it was one of my worst memories ever. I hurt my parents so much and will always regret doing that : (


#11

I never regretted it. I think it was the best decision I have taken. As it was there wasn’t anyone in my home I would ever miss. And then again after running away I went to my brothers house coz he is the only one I loved the best so I guess I would never regret that.


#12

Oof girl it’s kind that he wants to protect you but I getcha the whole overprotection is really…overwhelming. My whole family is like that especially with me. I think it’s becahse things that happened in the past, but then I was just a little, sweet, innocent girl. Now I mean I’m still sometimes sweet but do me wrong and I will be mean. I mean I can protect myself 100% but some people don’t get that.

Also a ex crush I guess friend of mine thinks it’s his job to know alllll my crushes even though he didn’t like me back :joy: it’s like I can’t like a dude but him :woman_shrugging:t5:


#13

Totally same!!! I can definitely relate.

Oh man LMAO.


#14

Right! I mean I love the care and whatnot but not being able to even hang out with my friends and blah blah or date and tracking me on my phone but still not letting me do anything it’s honestly getting tiresome and I can’t wait to be 18.

Also ikr! Like he didn’t like me back I guess but thinks he has the right to know who I like and when I don’t tell him then he gets soooooooo annoyed!


#15

Lol I feel like he is taking my freedom away. And no amount of reasoning can stop this over protectiveness. And yes. Can’t wait to be 18. Though there’s still a lot of time in that. LMAO. But I hate it when there is a ban on something I love doing.

And yeah. Like dude if you don’t like her back then you can’t blame her for moving on from you. You can’t expect someone to just adore you or something lol.


#16

My dad is kind of like that. But he allows me to do things(not everything). He just wants me to call him and talk to him like EVERY SINGLE MINUTE. I know it’s annoying, but you should try putting yourself in his shoes. I have an older sister, and when I was younger I used to worry so much when she went out. I became paranoid. Still kinda am. He just wants to protect you. The only thing you can do in this situation is prove to him you are capable of taking care of yourself and speak to him about it if it gets too much. But I get where you’re coming from, it’s pretty frustrating.


#17

I take karate. I can knock him down any minute… what else can I do that would male him believe I can protect myself?


#18

Right I’m sorry about your brother hopefully he knocks it off soon because that’s really annoying.

Right! That’s what my bestie said as well and it’s just so weird.


#19

It totally is weird! Guys and their egos.


#20

Lol. In that case, I don’t know…show maturity and responsibility I guess?I don’t know your brother, but maybe it’s not that he doesn’t trust you.Maybe, he doesn’t trust others(I hope you get what I mean). That’s what my dad always tells me at least. If that’s the case then, uhh, there’s not much you can do. Tell him how you really feel about it.