Then adopt a child
My boss fired me from work
Then adopt a child
My boss fired me from work
Set your boss on fire so you guys are even!
There is a murderer in my house.
Then move the house so the murderer is no longer in it.
I need to graduate but I failed an exam
Graduate, the take the exam
My brother won’t listen to me
Talk to your sister
My dog ran away
Take a stone as a pet, and call him Henk. Your new pet won’t run away this time.
I broke someone’s car.
Fix it
I forgot my password
hire a hacker
i ran out of food
Steal your neighbors fridge.
I got ghosted.
become a ghost yourself
my computer crashed
Call daddy pig
I forgot how to breathe
Swim.
I’ve got no money.
Break your arm.
I ate something too spicy.
Buy a panda!
The bathroom is taken.
Burn it, and make it look like your dog did it!
I am too lazy.
Tell your Llama he has to continue.
I’ve got nothing to wear.
Sing a song of Whitney Houston.
I’ve got a headache.
That’s okay—just read all the okay stories now.
My wife changed her status on FB from married to widowed. Should I be worried
Call your health insurance.
I’ve got a bad day.
Don’t have a bad day
I’m hungry