who is planning my funeral?!
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Holy shit 
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Not me!
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Broooooo That sounds like one pickle there
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I just wanna rant right now
Summary
I’m tired of people walking all over me and I’m tired of being the one crying and left with scars. I’m just done. This past week have been hard for me. I have closed everyone complety out , I have been putting fake smiles on my face like I’m Ok when I’m really not, I have closed all my emotion and everyone out, 3 days ago I told one of my friends that I’m straight cause she liked me as more than a friend and I told her I’m straight and then she goes telling me go fuck one of my bestfriend who’s on the forum just cause I hang out with him alot and I told her that he has a girlfriend and then she says “then go fuck your other guy friends and have fun dating guys when you could be dating me” and that hurts like hell and then she goes acting like everything ok like what she said didn’t hurt me like hell. Yeah we used to be forum dating but then I said I couldn’t handle it anymore and broke it cause I couldn’t deal with her cursing at me and yelling at me over just some small things and right now I can’t handle her OK I said it. I’m tired of people thinking that walking over me is OK and that I be definitely OK with that cause I’m not. I’m tired of it and then she goes telling shit and lies about me and then later on she acts like nothing happened and I’m just tired of it.
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i wish i had black hair
that my rant
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I have black hair but I wish I had different colored hair like blue or white 
You can dye your haif if you want 
But maybe, your parents will get mad…
lol that why i wish i had black hair
i want a purple/grey ombre but i have this very weird dark brown hair that looks like black hair
and i dont want to dye my brown hair black oof
plus idek if i can pull it off
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Stupid first world rant. Read with damn she stupid glasses.
I just need somewhere to rant…
I am not the best state of mind but I really love the community here so I am here to stay I guess.
This is sort of hard for me to write because I hate telling people how I truly feel because I feel like a burden. My suffering is my suffering, the pain I feel is mine to feel.
Academically I am stressed as well as writing wise.
Well, I am sort of angry at myself - for wasting my time on my story, for revamping a pile of crap into polished crap. I cannot believe it. What a joke, I do not know what I was thinking -_- As you can see, I am very hard on myself but I guess it is one of my many flaws…
I have acted on feedback, done all the promoting crap and all that jazz but I should have just accepted my story is just a piece of shit. I put my heart and soul into it so I am angry at myself to be so naive and stupid to write this. I should have stuck to writing poems solely or just not bothered. I should have just left writing to the experts and kept on being a reader.
It hurts and I should have known better. To expose the most vulnerable piece of me to others and I regret it. I regret it so much and I am sorry for wasting people’s time. I am even more sorry for wasting my time. The hours of directing, the thinking and time put into this story was high - the fruition is very little in my eyes.
I’ve felt this way before and I stopped writing altogether for a while. The mere thought of creatively writing made me sick. I couldn’t do it and I feel it now. I feel it and it is a horrible feeling.
I have decided to take a break, as I know if I touch my story I will probably delete it all and label it as a DO NOT READ. Maybe after my break, I would regret that so I am leaving my story be. I cannot even stand to read or go near my story right now, I know it will anger and upset me.
I have so much love and care from the community so the way I feel now is so so damn stupid I know.
Sorry if I come across as pathetic. I know I sound pathetic but I just need a way to release my hurt and anger I guess. I guess I should expect someone to tell me off for this - I vented like this once and was told I am stupid & pathetic, weak because I stumble when I meet failure but I always pick myself back up. However, she told me I was weak minded and I guess I am weak.
Well. If I get any crap for this I will delete my rant/vent. I do not have the energy to deal with bullcrap.
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@Days , I’ve read your story, it’s not crap
we all have doubts, self-criticism is always the harshest
Right now, I’m going through terrible writer’s block, idk if I’m even gonna finish the chapter I’m writing. But I’m going to take a break from it, so I can fall in love with coding my story all over again
Your problem may not be writer’s block, but whatever it is, a break will make you feel better
Maybe your problem is that revamping something is boring, the excitement fizzles out. In the meantime, maybe you could write a whole new story? Even if you never publish it, practicing with new ideas really helps freshen your mind
pm me if you ever need to talk or anything
I hope this helped!
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Thank you!
I am really attached to my story but I am just going through a rough stage at the moment and I feel like my story will slip through the cracks, I guess it happens.
Just coding in general seems like a chore and writing in general makes me fed up. I just am done with it but again, thank you so much for your reply 
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I feel the same honestly. The idea of writing excites me, but as soon as I open up the portal I close it straight away. It almost makes me cringe.
I promise it gets better, but if you feel like you’re done with writing for good, then that’s fine. I’m sure many people who have read your story will be disappointed, but I’m sure they’ll understand
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Thank you, hopefully I am not done for good but I know if I write right now, I am going to just quit for good.
It is a weird stage to be at, to look at the portal and just want to close it - I have gained some wonderful readers but at the same time, you see these other stories blow up like crazy and you just see your story just being stagnant is not a motivational thing haha.
I am a mess because I am happy that I have made people laugh, and enjoy my story but I am just kinda thinking - is there really a point?
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There’s always a point.
Sometimes it takes longer to realise what it is lol
Reads are hard to gain for most people. I know it sucks, but the more you write, the more reads you gain, right? Idk. Some stories blow up overight, it’s crazy. You just gotta keep advertising i guess
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Yeah I see some stories blow up like crazy and I just think wouldn’t that be cool if that happened to me? Well, I accepted that it will not happen.
Maybe after gaining motivation again I will start promoting again as at the moment I am in the sort of mood of “If you want to waste your passes and scratch your eyes out, please read my story.” which is not exactly the known as good advertising haha
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Take a break, dude
This happens to a lot of people. It does get better, but it does take a while for things to improve…
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Yeah I am taking a break haha - thanks for listening to my rambling, I just need some time 
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Anytime
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Ok here’s a rant
School is a pain. I open up to one person, ONE. PERSON and I get close to the too. But then they go around and hurt me. He was my best friend. And he ditched me. And I hated it.
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Sounds funny, but… wow. 
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