Thoughts On My Mafia Story

Hey guys ! :heart_eyes:

I’m currently writing a Mafia story called ‘The Rosiria Twins’ & I would love some feedback on it ! I am also doing a lot of research on this story, to make sure that it is as realistic as possible, and also to make sure that it is portrayed correctly.

- description

You and your twin are both heirs to the Mexican Mafia, but only one will descend to the throne. To decide who gets to be boss, your both assigned a mission… get rid of the heir to the Italian Mafia - Emilio Acerbi. Who will be victorious? You, your twin, or Emilio?

help with wording the description - @thewritingtomato :blob_hearts: :blob_hearts:

i would love some feedback & ideas on my story ! There are a lot of plot twists & surprises along the road of my story ! also i would love it if you guys would lmk if you would consider reading my story ! :))


i would definitely read this! A lot of people say that mafia stories are overrated and been done too many times, but i love them! as long as they are acc well written.

My biggest tip would be to make your characters (the twins+ any other main characters) really unique and relatable. By this i mean making them have weaknesses, goals, hobbies. Just really plan out your characters don’t just make them ohh i’m in a mafia don’t mess with me i’ll mess you up mate rahhhh you feel me?

But yes i would read it, lemme know if you need anyone to proof read or bounce ideas off of!
Best of luck :heart:


omg thank uu ! & yes i will definitely make them unique with their weaknesses, goals, hobbies, & etc.

thank you ! :blob_hearts: :pleading_face:

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I like them but there are some things that turn me off completelh.
First when the guy is like u can talk with no one and then he is like Imm sorry but I’m a bit overprotective bc this world is really hard and blah blah blah, I get that they have to be mafia and they’re not gonna be that tender but I mean she must learn about self defense and stuff. Also I kind of prefer them when they don’t see the MC and they are like wow I don’t know what it is but I like her, I like it is when it’s gradual and when they already have a relationship and they know about each other. But this id just my opinion, Im surr you’re story will be amazing :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Yea I totally get this! I just wanted to let you know that the MC & Emilio will not end up becoming a couple, but there will be a lot more romance in book 2 !

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Ohk! Sounds good :heart_eyes::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:
Prettt unexpected tbh :joy:

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thanks & yea, at first i wanted them to fall in love haha, but then i changed my mind since there’s literally NO WAY that they would end up falling in love :joy: :joy:

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Mmm sounds interesting :eyes::eyes:
Can you tag me when you publish? :see_no_evil::see_no_evil:

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ty ! & yes ofc i can !! :heartpulse: :heartpulse:

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bumpyyyyy hehe

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