Hello, I have a story that I worked really hard on and can you redears review the story upside down by MCMPLL please I’d really appreciate it and I want honest opnions. Thanks
Hey! Do you have a link?
I don’t really know how to send a link sorry, and thank you
That’s fine! The link is working! I do a review and if you want, you can read 3 episodes of mine
Story title : Sandy and her Quadruplets
Author : R.J.
Genre : Comedy
Description : How can she survive with noisy and disobedient quadruplets? Will she finally find the father of her sons ? Here’s the crazy life of Sandy and her quadruplets!
Here’s my review! I’ll be honest and my goal isn’t to hurt your feelings :
- Your story is interesting! I love the description in the beginning (when she’s talking about her past). I also love that she’s a nerd that is not stereotyped (example : the girl with the glasses, old clothes…). I think it will be a good idea if the reader can change the character hairstyle when she becomes Deliliah! I don’t know if it’s possible to change Roy or Luke hairstyle because I was a little bit confused (they look alike lol) but that’s hope to you
- It will be more interesting to see the reaction of the others teens the day after the party. Example, Lia hear Lee talking about Delilah to his friends, same for Stella.
- Be careful with the grammar, there was a lot of mistakes. I’m not going to focus on this subject, because English isn’t my first langage (also in my story, there’s mistakes that I’m trying to fix )
- The directing was fine. There were some scripts errors (example in episode 2, Lia said in the dialogue car_sound_off) and in the last episode, there were 2 musics playing in the background and it was disturbing.
- I found that the chapters were too long. Personnally, the length of the last chapter was perfect!
That’s all I have to say! I hope that my advice will be useful! Keep it up!!
Title: The Man inside the Gang Leader
Episodes: 3 (ongoing)
Genre: Romance and Action
Plot Summary: The gang life is the only life that Blaire penelope has ever known. No-one really ‘falls in love’ so when the gang leader falls for her,she doesn’t know what to do.
& it’s also lgbt+ friendly meaning that you can choose your sexual preference. I’ll do read for read and review for review just comment. Thank you. I’ll read yours soon.
Thank you very much I’ll use your advice and fix everything.
I read your story too and im planing on continue to read your atory I love how you build the tension and don’t reveal a lot of information, it’s very interesting.
No problem, thank you
I read your story and my notes are:
1)Great plot but you move to quickly to the next scene. I think it the would be nice if you’ll make the scenes a bit longer.
2)I love how you gave the readers a choice with who they want to be.
3)You give style choices and customization which is great!
4)I like how you explain the situations.
I liked your story!
Thank you so much! I’ll keep yours in my favorites so I can read the following
It’s my first story , check it out —>
Story name —> Choose!!!
No. Of episode —> 3(complete)
Story description —> You always wanted a chance!! Ting-ding!!!You get one ,but will you succeed or face defeat??? (No cc)
Hope you liked it😉
Totally going to read your story
Perfect! I’ll read it and give you a review!!
I read your story and here’s my review (my goal isn’t to hurt your feelings) :
- I like the concept. It’s really cool that we have 2 differents endings depending on the choices we made!!!
- The FIRSTNAME and PETNAME doesn’t work. You need to fix that!
- Be careful with grammar because there was mistakes. Same for the script!
- Sadly, the chapters were too short. It will be cool if it was longer. The reader must feel that the character hates the routine (example : she can make a burnout and starts complaining to her brothers about her life (unlike her bros who love their life) and she decided to run away. After that, she starts sleeping and the dream starts).
The idea is great but it will be better if it was longer! You need to develop the characters : What’s her relation with her brothers? (who she likes or dislikes the most?) Where’s her parents? What are the brothers personnalities?
That’s all I have to say and I hope that my review will help you
I’ll do review and you can read mine if you want too (but I don’t force you lol)
Here’s the link of my story if you’re curious:
I read the story and here’s my review (my goal isn’t to hurt your feelings) :
- I love the fact that we have many choices! Good job about that!! It’s really fun that we have many situations. On Episode, it’s rare to find stories like that!
- Sadly, the chapters are too short. You need to focus more on the story! It will be nice if it was longer, more actions.
- The description of the characters is well detailed! Really nice!!
- The directing was fine but there was a bug at the club when people were dancing like they don’t all appear at the same time.
That’s all I have to say! Good job and keep it up !!! I hope that my review will help you!
Thanks for reading it , I am bad at grammar but I started learning it …about character – I totally goona work on it…
Thanks for review
And no you don’t hurt my feelings , thanks for guiding
thank you so much! I’ll fix that