"When a guy picks on you, it means that he likes you" rant

I am pretty sure you are all going to agree with me on this one (I know one of the users make a point about this on the unpopular opinion thread about this) but I feel like I need to get this off my chest because I have been in these situations myself.

I don’t understand why people assume that if a guy bullies you, it means that he has a crush on you. That is the dumbest s**t I’ve ever heard in my life. It’s stupid because:

  • It gives girls the idea that being abusive in a relationship is cute when we all know that it’s not acceptable. There’s nothing cute about abusive relationships. That also includes the male victim.

  • Telling someone that the mean guy likes them makes the person traumatised and lose respect for you

  • No one finds it flattering when they have a creep stalking them online or in real life

  • It even sounds dismissive in a way because he does not like the girl

This glorification and romantisation of bullying needs to stop.



I need to go, but I’ll post a full blown mini-essay about this later :heart: :joy:


I can’t wait to read it. I just need to vent tonight because I have been feeling so out of place lately…


agree 100% it is the worst thing to say. i was told this so many times when i was bullied by the boys on my school and i hated it


I bet. They must have been awful! Have you told the authority about this?

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This was said SO much to me as a kid… When I was much younger, some boys were absolutely horrible (insults, violence etc…) to other girls (rarely it was towards me) and the excuse?

"They just have a crush on you" :expressionless:


I can’t stand it when people come up with that stupid excuse. Like there’s nothing cute about that. Like when I was picked on by some douchebag in college (12-13th grade in the UK), I was so lucky the authority took this seriously when I told them this guy and his friends were picking on me for no reason. Other idiots I used to be friends with came up with the excuse, “That’s because he likes you. You should be grateful that you’re getting all the male attention.”


YES ! Yes ! yES!

I’ve never really had many issues with boys for most of my friends were male until secondary school (high school) .

I still to this day truly hate a few boys in my tutor just as much as they hate me . And the one thing I’m sick of hearing is

"they just like you"
It’s a terrible excuse for me to not kick their ass in my opinion and is just insane .
I don’t find anything romantic about irritating me or annoying me . It just leads to me cursing for the devil to come at their door and knock them out !


:laughing: If I run someone over, it’s because I like them.
crush here I come :wink:


It’s so freaking annoying when they say that. Now you mentioned it, I remember I reported this idiot at the university I went to because he kept stalking me since college and it was a disaster. When I wrote the complaint form about what he was doing. At the meeting, I was talking to the student council and luckily the man took it seriously but the woman next to him said “It’s because he likes you” and man I lashed out on her. I was yelling about how much I can’t stand Asian men and so on even though the man who was interviewing me didn’t give a damn because he accepted my preference in men.


How many complaints have you had to file? I tend to just not bother with it and carry on with life but gosh , you must be glad that the man took your word for it !

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I hate this so much.

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It was a four page complaint form I had to sign. I wrote a super long essay on how he was stalking me since college til my final year at the university I went to.

First of all, when I was in my second year of college I was talking to someone about why I left Islam and he acted like I was a bad person for leaving the religion and treated me differently telling me that I shouldn’t wear clothes that show my figure and s**t. I made it clear to him that I’m not interested in him but he kept bothering me. I thought he really stopped bugging me after I finished college. But at university, it got worse because he kept stalking me when I was on my own or with my class mates.

I thought I wouldn’t see him again after a few encounter with that douchebag until that one day he bumped into me again, I got so mad that I told him to go away in front of the other students in the campus. So I went to the principal and told him everything. He sympathised with me and suggested to go on the university website to fill in a complaint form. So I did and e-mailed the person who takes care of this.

When the guy who interviewed me at the student council office, I was lucky he took my side so he gave me a panic alarm to use if he comes near me again.

But the next day, there was an update. The woman that I lashed out on, interviewed him few days ago and told me that apparently he wanted to be my friend because I was “having a bad day” pfft that was total rubbish! He was stalking me because he wanted to shove his beliefs down people’s throats.

After the meeting, the douchebag never spoke to me again.


I agree I feel like it’s saying if a guy hits you its because he loves you. So domestic violence is ok? No one who loves you would hurt you!

I got bullied at school by some boys who would make me feel really uncomfortable and do things I hated making comments about my body and jokes.

So did these guys fancy me? No they sexually harassed me! Anyone who hurts you in anyway does not love or respect you!


You’re a former Muslim?


Yes I am.


The fact that a creepy "crush " digs down into religion and stuff is just awful . I swear that woman who you lashed out at probably didn’t have anyone when she was younger or is just a true son of a gun


Exactly. Now you mentioned that, remember that stupid girl named Romina who made a video saying that if a guy hits you, it means that he loves you. Like WTF!

No one should be sexually harrassed. It’s not pleasant at all.


And the fact that people say that is stupid. Is it ok for a guy to touch me when I never asked for it and try to kiss me? No! It’s not ok! Molestation is not ok!


That’s interesting.