You can link your story down below and I will read it if you want.
I would greatly appreciate a review
I’m also down for reading unpublished stories!
Would also appreciate it if you guys could provide me with feedback on mine as well!
Description: A simple question from a stranger has led you to the hopeless yet exciting mess you are in now. Will you use your own experiences throughout the story when making choices?
Read the first episode and I did like where you are going. I don’t know if you are planning a CC in the second episode but if not I suggest you do though! I think it makes the reader connect more with the MC.
As for the flow in movements, I noticed that Brian stays in a laughing position for quite a while. You could put him in a neutral position as it is more natural.
Goodluck with writing the rest of your story!
The directing is good and I like the storyline, can’t wait for more episodes
I really loved how you gave the option to customize each character! As for the story line, love it. Can’t wait to read more! Also think you did a good job with the flow, everything was really smooth.
Keep it up!
What’s the link to your story?
I had fun customising the characters and can’t wait for the story to progress.
Hey I was actually wondering, do you think I should make the first episode longer or just leave it how it is?
Hey^^ I’d really like someones opinion on my story before I publish it. I hope some of you can give me feedback
Story: Wild one
Description: Being woken up in the middle of the night and forced to flee her home country, Tala soon has to face a new life, an old love, and a part of herself that she hasn’t yet discovered.
Episodes:2 (and the third kind of half way)
Your story seems really interesting. I think the MC’s personality/sensitivity would be more relatable if you showed it (for example that old man sitting alone thing) instead of letting the best friend describe it. That way the reader might get a better connection to your story. But otherwise everything is really well thought out. I like the plot idea and the directing is good I hope you continue writing and eventually publish your story^^
I’ve just read your story and I really did not expect the whole wolf thing, I liked it! I think your story line is great so far and it really invites to read on (if you’re interested in this genre). At least I know I will continue reading. I also liked the eye color changing of Theo. However in the Q&A there was a question where it said something like how Theo/Tala’s children don’t look a like. For me it was kind of a spoiler since Theo actually didn’t decide on the whole claiming her thing so I didn’t want to know the answer. As for grammar, you did a pretty good job on it considering English isn’t your first language. Anyway I hope you will continue writing, can’t wait for more episodes! Oh and for your first story, I thought you did well!
Thanks for your feedback! Will definitely think about putting that in!
The question is actually about their parents/family, not their children. I’ve coded the customisation templates to change the parents of Tala (Karl and Linda) alongside her and the family of Theo (David, Arya and the twins) to change alongside him. I’ll go and check my wording on this question, thank you for pointing that out^^
But otherwise thank you very very veeeeery much for your feedback. I am really surprised that you had so much positive stuff to say, that makes me kind of proud
It’s a really big compliment for me that you want to read more