A very naive Amber gets herself involved in a prostitution ring having no idea all of the drama it will bring.
I am interested in a read for read if needed. Honest feedback is appreciated!
WARNING: Sensitive content
Great story so far the plot is interesting the only things I would do is speed up the zooms because they are a bit slow, working on your sentence formatting just because it doesn’t flow that well. There is also a lot of narrating so it feels like your just being talked to the whole chapter, remember characters can have conversations too! Make sure you are also being consistent it really helps to know the beginning and ending of your story, for example you said the main character was celebrating her 19th birthday then it says the morning of her 17th birthday. But overall I love the backgrounds and I can see your trying the first story is always the hardest.
Thank you so much! It is my first story but I will work on that right now but is the chapter length fine?
I would make it just a little bit longer you really want to grasp the reader and have a good cliffhanger so they can’t wait to read the next chapter.
Okay so im gonna add a little bit of chapter 2 in there then leave it at a cliffhanger
Hi! Thanks for this thread these are my story details xx
Author Insta: @bonniedundee.epi
Title: Game Of Disguises
Brief Description: Two best friends have fun by disguising themselves as other people and attend luxurious and fancy events, but what happens when they find themselves in the wrong place and at the wrong time?
LGBT inclusive + Advanced Directing
Hey! I’ve created 2 stories so far, and I would love it if you’d check 'em out!!
Author Name: Giselle Crescent
Description: Being the daughter of Zeus isn’t easy. Add responsibilities and your mother having cancer topped on with a forbidden temptation to a boy who can rock your world , literally. CC
The Ember Moon Pack
Author Name: Giselle Crescent
Description: You’re an average highschool girl. What’ll happen to your life when you get kidnapped by a pack of Hybrids that claim that you are their sacred Queen? CC, ChoicesMatter, 5Endings
Sorry about how long it took me to get to you but honestly there’s not much to say except your story is nothing short of amazing I love the cover art, and the directing is flawless. The only thing I would really suggest is to show a little bit more of the conflict in the first chapter the length is perfect but the first chapter is meant to really grab you although I was interested by the intro I was a little confused afterwards it looked like I was just following someone’s life and couldn’t really wrap my head around what the problem was. But otherwise I love the story keep up the good work!️
Again sorry for the wait I only had time to read DEMIGODDESS I love the story so far the only feedback I have is a little petty and it has to do with the phone, I feel like it looks a lot better as an overlay with the persons phone background if your going to show text messages but again that’s just my opinion also with the opening it was very choppy with the intro you seemed to be going for with how quickly things can change I feel like you can make it more dramatic and no I’m not talking about with zooms I feel like a common mistake episode writers make is that flawless directing is what makes the story when in reality your story should be able to intrigue readers whether it was done with an all black background all the way through. But otherwise great story I will definitely keep reading. Keep up the good work! ️
I’d love a R4R!!
Story: BLACK BETTY
Plot: Betty is a small town girl with big dreams of becoming a rock star. Navigating stardom, relationships, fans, and parties…Will she make it or break it? CC
Thank you so muchh!!!
Thank you so much xx
The cover is amazing it definitely drew me to the story however I would so something different for the smaller cover just so that the size fits better and so it’s something different although I know it’s a little hard to find someone to either do that cover or to make it yourself. I’m also loving the outfits you have no idea how irritating it is when I am reading a well directed story with the tackiest outfits (unless there is a set reason behind it.) I also love all of the comedy. I don’t really have much to critique, will definitely continue with the series. Great job!
Thanks so much!! (I totally get the outfits thing, drives me nuts haha). I’ll check yours out in a bit!! I appreciate the feedback sooooo much
Just read the first 3 chapters of your story! I love it so far. I’m going to keep reading. Nice job!!