Would you read this story? is there anything i should change?

I’m currently working on a story and I’m not sure if it’s good so I need someone’s feedback and help.

Cara’s mom gets a phone call that her old-time friend is moving back to town, so Cara’s mom (Audrey)
asks Cara to show her friend’s kids around town. Cara gets into a love triangle and can’t seem to get out of it (Isaac) (Noah) (Xavier) although their sister seems to despise Cara for a valid reason. Throughout the rollercoaster, Cara finds out they’re vampires, at first, she freaks out but then she takes it well. (there will be a lot of plot twists and great adventures.)

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Hey girl,

I have a few questions…
It’s definitely good…
I’m really curious so I should read it out of curiosity!!! :wink:
Why are you doubting??
Is this your first story??
When it is… Try to make writing fun for you…
'Cause I am also writing (several stories) and I got bored after a few episodes…
But don’t give up!! If you need more advice, help or you are stuck with something…
You can always ask me, you can look for help at the Episode-Guide or you could watch the Episode-tutorials of Joseph Evans at Youtube.com (they are very useful, too :laughing: )

Love A-W

Thank you, and yes this is my first story and i’m overwhelmed if i should write about this because maybe people will think its basic or its probably not interesting. Do you think i should change something because i would much appreciate feedback, thank you!

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Hey,

No, I shouldn’t change much… It sounds really interesting to me… So, don’t doubt about it…
But I should also give info why the father isn’t in the picture…
(Because most readers will be curious about that, too… :wink: )
Do you have choices in your story?? You still have to question yourself if you want to make it more difficult for yourself with choices or not… (Because it will be more difficult to direct if you have choices…)
My weakness and a lot of other writers weakness is directing…
For scene directing and moving characters watch the tutorials from Joseph Evans or read the Guide on Episode…

Love A-W

The father is going to appear later and i’m going to include choices.

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Hey,

Personally, I admire writers with choices, because they have the courage to put some choices in their stories…
But for me… I write my stories without choices, because that makes it easier for me… (sounds lazy, but I’m not… :joy: )
I had several test-stories with choices and every time the stories didn’t end well like I wanted… :zipper_mouth_face:
What I like to learn from writing is actually putting multiple choices by each other… (like those Q&A after every episode in some stories).

I understand you don’t wanna give info about the father, now… :wink:

Love A-W

I respect how you write your stories and btw if you ever publish a story tell me!!! I would really like to read it:)

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Hey,

Tysm!! I already have 3 stories… :wink:
Read them…
The first two stories I wrote: ‘Little Star’ and ‘The door is open…’ are in both styles INK and LL…
They are completed already…
My last story ‘The search of Thomas f*ing White’ is only in LL.
(Because in my opinion the characters are not as funny or pretty if they all should be in INK… :wink: )
I still am continuing writing that story (I want to make 50 episodes…)
And I also started writing another story independent from those three stories: ‘Bounded minds’.
Still not published and not finished…
Feel free to read them… You find them under my episode profile: AngelWings.

Love A-W

I will very much check them out, thank you btw:)

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You’re welcome!!
Don’t hesitate to ask some questions if you’re stuck with writing… :wink:

Love A-W

Did you make a cover for this story? Because I think that what attract the readers more .i loved the idea of the story . don’t stress yourself cause the first story is the first experiment and the beginning .for me i love the vampires stories and i am looking forward to read it .:heart_eyes::smile_cat:

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Thank you! I’m still working on the cover, what do you think would be a great idea?

Seriously I don’t know . what do you think about something similar to this

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I used some outlines and draw the rest . sorry i put a
name “where am i” i wish i could write astory but i am studying so i only draw and give a name :rofl::rofl: i hope you can use it in something by make some changes :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts: you can ask someone who make cover too.

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Moved to Share Feedback since this is about story ideas. Make sure to check out our Forum Tutorial for more info about creating topics, and feel free to PM me if you’ve got questions. :wink:

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Sorry i am new :sweat_smile:

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No worries, it happens :grin:

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thank you!

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