You're opinion needed

So I have this idea from one of my favorite games called Bendy And The Ink Machine (BATIM) if you don’t know what this is it is a game from kindlybeast check it out it’s awesome. However there is this character called Alice Angle who is obsessed with becoming “perfect” to the point that she will kill just so she can be “beautiful”. I kinda wanna create a character like that but I don’t know if this seems to much of a cliche? what do you think?

3 Likes

You are make a good story to read and love to.i thank it be good story to read.

i love bendy too, i even have an alice cosplay

anyway, if you wanna make that story go for it, could be an interesting horror or thriller

1 Like

thanks ! and and alice cosplay? awesome!! I love her so much!!

mmm youd need a strong goal and motivation for her

Well her mother was someone who would push her to be very pretty she would force her to go to do modeling at a very young age. the mother would always push her and say that she isn’t good enough. one day she got into an accident or she got murderd (I’m still not sure which one to go for) if she got into an accident she would have had a terrible scar on her face/ body and her mother would call her ugly because of this. she becomes obsessed with becoming beautifull and eventually lost her mind. She became even more obsessed to the point as to where she makes a deal with someone. you will become beautifull but to remain this way you have to collect other peoples youth this is what she does and soon she finds out that magical people can make her younger and prettier for a much longer time. because of this she will collect their souls by murdering them and with special rituals

this isn’t compleetly thought out yet but this is kinda were I want to go to what do you think?

1 Like

Why would the mother push her? Is it to see her dreams through her child?

Think about the impact this will have on the characters/story. Though I think you should go for the accident.

Maybe it’ s not just the mother, it’s the people saying she needs to be prettier too.

How does she find that magic exists? When does she get so desperate that she will do anything?

How long? Is this infinite? How would this impact the story? How can they make her prettier for a longer time? Is there a spell or concoction to make that happen?

1 Like

I had something in my mind similar to this, it’s a great idea imo.

I don’t think it would be cliche, I mean I haven’t seen a lot of this.

This is great. Go with the accident. Would totally read this

1 Like

This idea is awesome! And I love BATIM. Such an awesome game!

Tips:

  1. Make sure the story doesn’t just evolve around her mother wanting her to be pretty. She would need to be told by several other people to properly get influenced.

  2. Think of a good way for her “ugly turning point”. If she got murdered then how is she alive to want to be pretty? An accident or a misfortune would be more applicable.

  3. Make sure to develop the story slowly. Don’t jump straight into the plot. Common mistake:

Mother: You are ugly.

Girl: tff?? I need to be pretty now I’ma kill everyone and be obsessed with the image of being beautiful.

Mother: No you ain’t.

The end.

Just make the story go along gradually.

(That was a poor example lol)

Most importantly: Have fun!

1 Like

That would be amazing !!! Like you could give your character a modern twist and OOOOOOO THIS ISGONNA BE SO GOOD and then you could make the name like /enter first name here/Lawyer :joy::joy::joy: or something like that, I dunno and cliches are a good thing to have because … No story,movie whatever is complete without a cliche !

i like it

2 Likes

Yeah it is not just the mother but her mother has a big impact on her life because her father died (He was a soldier in a war and died there) social media is something that pushed her as well. She found out that magic exits because one of my characters (male or female I still don’t know who to put here) walked up to her to “Help her become beautifull” claiming that there is a way to become perfect considering that she isn’t. Him/her would show her that magic exits by using magic and showing what it can do. if she uses a normale persons soul she can only be younger/ prettier for a very short time ( an hour or so) if she uses magical peoples souls it can be for around a month or more because the magic contains something that keeps youth. now this isn’t possible for just any magical creature either this is only possible if she uses the souls of wizards( that just what I’m going to call them right now) who practice blood magic. this is a magic that is very rare. you can’t fight with it but you can create impossible things (still need to think more about this) however because they have this magic they have a special soul

to be able to remain beautifull forever she need to collect the soul and the magic from my MC. who has a special soul. Why? I don’t know yet this part still need more work

if there is a spell to make this happen? yes however this also needs some more work

I think it sounds kinda interesting. As long as you give the character depth then I don’t think it’ll be cliche.

1 Like
  1. yes social media would be something that has a great impact on her because of all the people who post those pictures on the internet. but keep in mind that her mom would not let go and be a normal kind. she wasn’t alllowed to play outside for example because then her dress would get dirty or something like that (still needs more work )

  2. well I was thinking with her murder that I would use some kind of magic that would bring her back to life but to me this also seems so basic? like it is a fantasy story so let’s just make a character die an bring her back to life so yeah I’m more going to the accident or misfortune side maybe something that went wrong with an operation. for example that she wanted to make her self prettier with medical help but this failed terribly (I’m just gonna say it again because indeed it still needs more work)

  3. No no no no noooo nothing like that I hate it when people do that just because someone says it once characters shouldn’t immidently become obsessed! it takes time before that happens it takes more then just her mom to do this I was just thinking maybe something of betrayal from her friends or something like that but no not the “I got called ugly once let’s just change my whole apereance” it’s just not logical to me

1 Like

I think that this is a very good idea. However, what would be her entire drive? I understand she wants to be beautiful, but, as you can see in the description, she’s already achieved that. What changes in the story? Like, what’s the major turning point in this story? Because this alone is good, but you also need this conflict whether it be Character v. Character, Character v. Themselves, etc, etc,

Yeah there is where I’m getting stuck. one thing is for sure she has lot her mind so it doesn’t matter to her anymore it it seems logical. she will face the MC and his friends however I’m thinking about killing some of the friends of in this fight against her. this way my MC will change from being a guy who believes everything can be solved by just talking into someone who will use his fists. I know for sure that I want in this fight something big to be revealed about the MC maybe his true family or his brothers dead ? like I said still not sure. I also don’t know if I really want to have her dead at that part she could still be of use when the final fight starts against the he/she character that gave her the magic. however I want to make her cruel someone you hate but at the same time can understand where it came from.
it all still needs more work and this story will have 3 if not 5 seasons

1 Like

Ok, so you want to have someone relatable. Think about some people who are obsessed with beauty, or have been peer pressured and about their experiences and how they dealt with it whether it be in a positive or negative way that way it seems more realistic

1 Like

How do you make your own outfits

first press this button


then this one

then scroll down and add clothing

you can choose male or female clothing

here you can choose which character I hope this helps you a bit

if you want to ask people about this I suggest to make you’re own forum

and thanks you guys for helping with you’re opinions

that is a great idea I often think about some teenagers or a movie that I watched to get some more details for this character but like I said alice angle inspires me a a lot because she is truly obessed (in my eyes) with beauty and she has done some terrible things in the series

1 Like