Hi guys. So I’m in a weird situation and I need help. There is this guy who is very rude to me at times and is in my “friend group” that consists of 12 people. I don’t think he knows he is being rude, he is usually nice. However, he thinks we’re all so close and that he can say whatever he wants but he says some hurtful stuff. To me at least. He once straight up,in my face, compared me to my 2 best friends saying that their bodies are much better than mine and that I look like a wood log basically was saying that I have no curves (I’m naturally skinny af). One other time I was joking around with my best friend and I asked her what should I do about the guy I like and he heard that and went:“Quit it, he doesn’t like you anyway”. He doesn’t even know him. So,yeah he just straight up insults me all the time. These were just two examples of what he has said to me. He already knows how low my self-esteem is and he is making it worse. He really frustrates me sometimes but I don’t want to talk to him about it or argue with him as he will then tell my whole “friend group” about what happened between us and I don’t want them talking shit about me…Is there any other way I can fix this?
Look, At the end of the day, you gotta live your life. You gotta live about what you do, say. Dont let anyone walk all over you because now they’ll think your a weakling or soft. You gotta put your foot down at some point in your life. If you lose some friends, then you lose some. That means that they weren’t real since the beginning. You lose some & you win some. The boy probably likes you that’s why he told you that your crush wouldn’t like you. You can’t be a pushover all your life. You gotta set boundaries to make them respect you. And in order to get respect, that person gotta be able to give it. I would tell him to back off. I be damn if I let someone disrespect me in front of my face and friends!
You’re 100% right. It’s just…hard. I never was an outgoing person so speaking up and defending myself aren’t things I’m used to. I’ll try. Also, about the crush thing, haven’t really thought of it that way. It’s…interesting. Thank you for replying. I know the episode forum isn’t the best platform to publish this, but I really have no one to discuss it with lol.
Your welcome! I’m was never an outgoing person too. But, I had to learn that I can’t let people push me over. You gotta speak up for yourself. Otherwise, you’ll get used to it & let them take over your life
I think you need to make a decision, to stop being their friends or you can confront them about it and then decide to stop being their friends,
I’ve actually experienced this before, and it’s quite scary.( for me) I lingered on this idea for ages, but then I finally told my friend (who had consistently insulted me but laughed afterwards like it was just a joke), and at first she was quite dismissal about it, so I started going to the library, sitting myself, making more friends, etc, but after the new year I guess she reflected or something and she was a much better friend and we are still friends 